i saw my bfriend's BF from a motel..!!!

I really think that she deserves to know being your "Best-friend" what kind of BF she has. Although I think you really have to confirm that what you see is him and not anybody else or else you might just ruin a relationship. It could be that the person you see is with your best-friend or what. So be very sure that what you saw was really him and with somebody else or it might just be that he slept there alone with for some reasons.

Well let's put it this way:"If the situation was the other way around and your friend new that your partner was having an affair but did not tell you, how would this make you feel?"
Personally I would be mad as hell if my best friend did not tell me about this.

hello janebeth,

Oh, NO BUsted! i guess some or most guys can't seemed to have enough because if they can't fling with the one they love, they'll d on some one else, play around with some one else and have a degree of excitement and pleasure. it seems he will be guilty for the rest of his life until your dbfriend finds out. i believe if you're a true friend you should tell her and probably if she doesn't believe you, the next you see him bring a camera.

Tell her you saw him from a motel and let her decide what she thinks he could have been doing there and if need be to ask him about it.You might save your bestfriend a lot of heartache in the long run.

I also think it's the best way to do is to talk to the boy. I think if your friend had introduced you to him, he will also consider you as a friend. Let him tell her the truth before someone else tell her about his unfaithfulness.

If you can't do that, you can try to talk with her. I think, the best way to tell her is for both of you to sit down and tell her everything. It's not that you are trying to ruin their relationship, but it is to save the relationship. Not only theirs, but also yours with them.

You can try to tell her the truth, by story-telling of someone else's story. What I am trying to say is, tell her what you saw but not telling her that he was him, that you actually saw coming out of the motel with another girl. Give her the story using another person.

I think that will be the starting point of it, and later on, she will think about their own relationship in the picture. She will have doubts, so she will try to investigate and assess her bf.

When after you have talked, and you learned that he did not confirm, accept or "plead guilty", that will be the time you will tell her the whole truth, and nothing but the truth, as your BEST FRIEND.

I've never been in that situation but, if I were, I think I'd rather talk to my friend's boyfriend first and ask him if he truly loves your friend or not. I'd tell him that I saw him at the motel and let him explain why. I'd also tell him how much my friend loves him and how this would tear her apart if she found out.

Maybe he has another explanation other than cheating, although I kind of doubt it from the way you've written this discussion. I'd want to hear his side of the story before talking with my friend. If he seemed to not care about my friend's feelings, then I'd have no choice but to tell her in the most supporting way I could.

When I found out my first husband was cheating on me, I was completely crushed, but I recovered. Your friend will, too, and will even be stronger because of it.

maybe your bestfriend's boyfriend has some business negotiations or other matters which is not form of cheating from a motel, just make sure that you have the right intuition first before telling it to your bestfriend.

That is very true. Love doesn't mean just sheltering a person from getting pained. The truth will surely hurt her but it will definitely set her free. Sooner or later she will find out about her BF's fooling around, either you tell her now or you will just wait for her to discover it, she'll be hurt. You must choose a lesser evil.The earlier she finds out the sooner she'll know what to do. If you love her,don't deprive her of the chance to know the truth. Be always there for her. Goodluck.:-)

of course your friend should learn about this.If she is really being cheated,it's better to know it early than late.if it hurts,it will sooner or later.just tell her about it,and it's her business to decide what to do next.

the best thing to do is not say anything, but get the friends boyfriend and tell him that you have seen him and if he doesn't stop, you will tell her about it, the thing is, she may be your best friend and you worry about her feelings, but if you interfere then you may not be thanked for it, if her b/f does not stop then maybe send her an anonymous letter telling her what he's up to, or try nd get some pics on your phone and send them to her from another number, you do not want to lose your friend so she must not know that you know, but you could take the chance and tell her and see what happens, but i would not tell her because you will be accused of snitching and it may cause arguments between you and her b/f, but do tell him that you know and give him an ultimatum, tell him that if he doesn't stop then his girlfriend will find out....do not jeopordise your friendship by telling her, sooner or later she will find out anyway and she will need you as a shoulder to cry on....