Specific Role

I use to be a very independent woman where I would do everything for myself and I frowned upon people who are totally dependent on others. I was in a relationship for 4yrs and we were married even though it did not seem like a marriage but it ended. I remember during the relationship I would get asked to get him some water or something from the fridge and I would say you have 2 legs why can't you do it? I always got upset when I got asked to do things from him and maybe that was a downfall in our relationship.

I have a new friend and I took some things I learned from my old relationship and implented them into this one. I cook, clean, do his laundry and I take away his plate when he is finished eating and I seem to get a different response. Now he is just spoiled by all the attention and sometimes won't help me do stuff around the house that he thinks I can handle. I grew up in a single parent household so I was never around a marriage or like two people in love I guess you would say. I know I am a woman and everyone thinks that they should just cook, clean, etc but is it really wrong to ask for help for the other partner to do something? There is a role in every relationship and I am just trying to figure out how to play it correctly before I miss out on someting great just because I am so stubborned..