Are you worried about a loved one's obesity?

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This was always a touchy subject with my ex and I. Over the years we were together he gained what I percieve as 150 to 200 pounds. He was a bit hefty when I met him but after a few years he was breaking furniture. Of course the aesthetic matter was a concern with me, my primary concern was for his healthy. Every time I looked at him he would be cramming handfuls of junkfood into his mouth at a time. For example when was eating chips he would not just eat them one or two at a time but 10 or 20 a time, as many as he could cram in there. Crumbs would be flying everywhere. If I said anything he would bite my head off. I can't imagine he was very happy and no matter how I appoached the subject he would just yell at me then give me the silent treatment for a couple of days. I myself would diet even though I needed it a lot less than him thinking that my diet and exercise would encourage him and set a good example. It seemed he ate more at these times. I would say things like, I find it really hard to stick to a program and want to join a group but I am shy to by myself, would you come with? He would say that he had better things to do than join a fat people pity party, so uncool. In the end I left him, not just because of the weight issue but his similar stubborn attitude about other things in life but the whole time I felt so helpless like there is something I could have done to help him. Some different approach I could have taken. In the end I started to blame myself, that somehow I was causing all his misery. He seemed to hate me all the time and I could not figure out why. In the end I realized he was just an extremely unhappy person and no-one had a chance around him unless they catered to his every whim and gave up and him and let him live until he just keeled over from a heart attack or some other weight related disorder. To me that is not caring about someone. Anybody ever been in a similar situation?