When did spiders learn how to become invisible?  |
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 They've either learned how to be invisible or they've learned how to cross into another dimension. :P
Yesterday, I woke up and went to take a shower. When I came back in my bedroom, I was straightening up my bed when I saw it: a medium-sized Eeeeeeeevil (tm) black spider sitting on my bed! My bed! The Holy of Holies! That's not right! Everyone knows that it's against international law for spiders to be on someone's bed. But there it was. It had started to run, but stopped when it saw me looking at it. (Looking at it in abject terror, I might add.)
We stayed in a Mexican standoff, neither one moving nor looking away from each other, for a good 10 minutes. Then I realized I could easily stay stuck standing at the foot of my bed for the next several decades if I didn't make a move soon.
I quickly glimpsed around the room to find something to hit the little ... (insert a word that begins with a "B," ends with a "D" and means the offspring of two unmarried spiders).
I saw a board over in the corner that is part of a disassembled blanket rack I own. While continuing to keep the spider in sight, I got the board and made my way back to the bed. I was hoping to "rack" up a kill, or at least stun it enough to be able to transport it out of the house.
I quickly took aim and ... THWAP! Down on the bed came the board. When I moved the board, I realized with a sick feeling in my stomach that I had missed, or had hit it so hard that it was pulverized into billions of microscopic pieces too small for the human eye to see.
While I was hoping the latter was true, I knew deep inside that the former was probably the case. Except ... where did it go? It didn't fly up when the board hit the bed. It didn't get hit by the board (because there were "evidence." Ewwww!). It was no where to be found. And believe me, I looked. I looked everywhere.
The only possibilities are that it turned invisible or transported into another dimension, or both. :P
Now I dread sleeping in my bedroom, not only because I fear the spider will come back from The Planet of Invisible Spiders, where it's obviously gone, but because I've sprayed enough chemicals in there to kill small Third World country.
What do you do when the spider you were hunting gets away and is still on the lose, able to terrorize innocent humans at will? :P
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The only spider I like |
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1.  inked4life (3357) | 3 years ago |  This always happens to me around bed time...you'll see a spider crawling around and go get a newspaper to whack, come back and it's gone. The end result is that I lay awake for hours imagining the fuzzy little sucker crawling over my skin....yech...gives me the heebie jeebies
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 xphile777 (320) | 3 years ago | I know! Isn't it horrible? What's worse is I can't even charge the little devils rent. They get to terrify for me for free. :P | |
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| 2. shywolf (3828) | 3 years ago |  Oh, I know exactly what you mean! I had this happen to me a couple of weeks ago - when I was sitting eating lunch a spider must have come down from the ceiling, and landed on my tray. Oh boy. I was afraid to move at first, but then I put the tray on the chair next to me, and the spider wasn't moving at first, so I thought that I was going to be able to do something about it without too much of a fuss. But then it ran around the side of my tray and I could no longer see it, and I was afraid to pick up the tray for fear that it would run onto my hand or something!*laugh* And by the time I got someone else in here to look, it had dissappeared. I wasn't sure that I wanted to sit out here the rest of the day worrying that the spider was on the underside of this chair where i sit at the computer, but I didn't know what else to do. Thankfully, we finally found the spider on the underside of the chair, so it didn't completely dissappear. But I know all too well that feeling that a spider is loose in your house and you don't know where!
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| 96vidalias (191) | 3 years ago |  You weren't eating your curds and whey, by any chance?
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| brokentia (7815) | 3 years ago |  that reminds me of a co-worker in Florida that had to call in sick a few days.
They had told us that she had a spider bite and was ill.
When she returned, she had to sit on a donut!
She told us that he was sitting on her porch on one of those plastic chair with the slits in the seat and that they learned the spider had built a nest on the underside of the chair...well, you can guess where it bit her! A brown recluse!!!
Uncool!!! So, for over a year now, I flip my outside chairs over and look. And would you know it, I found a spider a few times!!! I will never sit on one of those chairs again without looking first!!!
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| 3. freesoul (2703) | 3 years ago |  I have no problem with spiders, they are harmless little innocent creatures lol
The can only be annoying when they try to build their little webs inside your home and settle down..anyway (and as you already did) it's enough to just spray the room with a bestride and lock it for an hour or so then air it before you use it a again.. the spider will not survive it.. and no need to worry about the "revenge" of the spiders, you must have seen a bit too many horror movies lol
Sheer up:)
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| 4. sunshinecup (5911) | 3 years ago | LOL, what a story! What do I do? I move. Leave all belongsing behind, it's not worth it! I HATE spiders. Too many legs for me, LOL. | |
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| 5. 96vidalias (191) | 3 years ago | Ahh, I love a good spider story. But I guess you would call this the story of a bad spider. They have always had the power to become invisible. Since you sprayed so thoroughly, just listen very carefully for its tiny hacking cough and you will soon find it. | |
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| xphile777 (320) | 3 years ago | So that's what that wee noise is I hear in the middle of the night. Eeek!:) | |
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| xphile777 (320) | 3 years ago | LOL! You mean you didn't move??:)
I'd move. I'd leave everything, including family members, and run! Eeeeeek!
And why do spiders have to have babies? Isn't there some type of birth control we can give them?:P | |
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| 8. Melizzy (966) | 3 years ago |  I do not like spiders. I do not know why they exist, but I am sure God had a reason for making them. I just don't know what that was. Spiders are creepy and can just ball up and disappear.
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| xphile777 (320) | 3 years ago | I think God was in a pissy mood when He made spiders. I think He needs to rethink His design of spiders and the human female reproductive system. They both could have been done better.
Hey ... is that thunder I hear??;) | |
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| 9. wawaww (68) | 3 years ago |  xphile777 Why, oh, why do lefties (I might have said "my fellow lefties" and I don't mean southpaws) tend so often to eschew a fact-based approach to arguments? Why do they tend toward hysteria, fear-mongering and prurient sensationalism?
I must first apologize that Spider Friday took a week off for the bustle of activity that was Yearly Kos. I felt a little like a male Wandering Spider, seeking shade in the desert heat while searching desperately for...information.
I have gotten many requests to treat arious types of spiders. Among these requests the jumping spiders--family Salticidae--have had a place of prominence. The problem is, it's just too vague--there are 5026 described genera in the Salticidae. And anyway, I wanted to continue my series about spiders with unusual hunting habits.
So I said to myself: let's do both. Today, I will introduce you to the Vampire Jumping Spider --the only spider with a fondness for human blood. And when I'm done, you'll wish they were in your neighborhood--because they're quite beneficial.
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