Team zit destruction, thank you  

I went to the dermo-ma-doo-da-tologist last month, and he stabbed me with needles and now the thing's almost gone. It certainly doesn't hurt anymore. And by the time I got to Kimmel, their crack make-up staff was able to make it disappear like a plate of cocaine in Ann Coulter's dressing room.

I've always been very proud of the cynicism, world-weariness and general, pissy-punk attitude of most of the responders. Gathered 'round me, ye disaffected!

But these last two days you all turned into a pack of concerned, sweet Jewish grandmothers. And nothing brings a tear to my eye faster than someone who's screen name is "PussiesCryRape" admonishing me not to get the compress too hot, or I might burn my punim.

We're going to make it. Each and every one of us.