Alarming child behavior

She is actually very active and loves to play outside. She is also a very good dancer. However, she just has this idea lately of not eating much. One good thing though, we told her that junk foods are bad and fattening and she never touch another junk food since then. Though its good but I find it not normal really because she is just 5-years old for pete's sake and I expect her to want junk foods no matter what. I will sure find a way of telling her what you suggested. Thanks very much for your idea and response.

Oh I do agree with you beautyqueen that we really have to be sneaky and that is just what we did. Seems funny really when I think about it because she consumes a lot of milk everyday that she would never really get thin. If her growth hormone is not working up, I doubt if she would even look thinner. We do let her eat other things such as cheeze, apples and a lot of fruits especially banana and let her take food supplements. I am confident that she is never lacking in nutrition. We did consult her pediatrician about her dieting and he told us that it is okey as long as she consumes milk by the 'gallons' and eats a lot of fruits. For her carbo diet, she also eats spaghetti which she thought doesn't fatten her up.

Hello cdparazo, As a mom of a similar aged girl, I am very shocked by your nieces new obsession with weight. Certainly, you are right to be concerned. It is possible that she is picking these weight messages up from TV as the other person mentioned. My kid is super picky when it comes to food, and we struggled for years just to help her put on the weight she needed. So, she's always been naturally skinny. And, while most moms struggled to get their kids to eat less, I had the opposite battle. It was real hard to get her to eat anything, at all, and she began to lose weight drastically. Just normal kid pickiness, you know. But, it was still worrisome. One of the things that I found that can work for a kid that just won't eat, is to sneak calories into their food. So, she knows that junk food is fattening. But, does she know that sour cream has lots of calories too. What about cheddar cheese. Or, pecans. Tastes yummy, but very high calorie. Maybe her mom could put a dollap of sour cream or handful of cheese on her soup. Cheese sandwiches are the perfect opportunity for more calories. Or, incorporate a tablespoon of pecans into a fruit salad. She's going to eat the fruit salad because she imagines that it's low calorie. Fruit always is, right? But, the pecans or nuts, will provide the calories that her body is missing from other foods. Regular milk is very high calorie. But, it's very healthy too. When it comes to kids you have to break the rules and be sneaky sometimes. Especially concerning matters of health. You simply can't let them get away with not eating. If her family is very weight concsious and use lots of skim milk and low fat foods, maybe the little girl could have regular non-diet foods of her own. When my daughter went through this phase, she would only eat a few bites of food at every meal. So, every calorie counted. I would add extra butter and cheddar cheese and even an egg into her macaroni cheese meal. So, even if she only ate three bites, it would be sufficient calories. I'm not suggesting that you encourage her to eat sweets, but there are really good foods that are not low calorie, that will keep her from losing weight. What about traditional lasagna, or spagetti. Not low fat. Not low calorie. If talking to your niece hasn't helped her, have you or her mom considered counceling. Some kids just need someone outside the family to speak with. And, automatically assume that everyone inside the family circle is biased toward a certain point of view. So, of course they won't listen. An outsider will have a fresh voice and perspective. I hope that you do not take what I am saying wrong, and understand that I am only speaking from the point of view of a mom who has been through something similar. My kid wouldn't eat either. Not anything. Ever. But, we got through it. Please be sure that your neice sees her pediatrician as he or she will know how to advise best on this matter. I wish you and your family the best. And, hope that things work out for everyone.

You could be right. She went to a Montessori school with my daughter but she stopped right in the middle of the year. She just tells us that she doesn't want to go to school anymore and refuses to budge even with our prodding her or even bribing her just to continue to go to school. Her teachers are really very good teachers who just let her be in instances that she doesn't want to participate. I don't know if she was ever being teased since her teacher never mentioned it. Thanks for your ideas and comments!

I'm sorry to say that teachers are not always aware of bullying or teasing because the children are afraid to tell them, in case of further retribution and the playground supervisors can't be everywhere and see what every child is doing. It's a sad fact, but that's the way it is. If only you could get her to talk about it, she might be more open in future and not feel that she has to cope with the problem alone, by the only way she knows how... not eating.

I do agree with you that most of the time the teachers are not aware of what the children are saying or doing. However, in their school environment, the teachers are more focused.But still the possibility exists. I am just thankful that she doesn't know that with the amount of milk she is taking everyday, she would never really get as thin as she may want to be.

My daughter eats a lot more compared to my niece though she is maybe thinner. She got it from her father side. We do work on the food factor and try to give them healthy food on a day to day basis. Thanks very much for the compliment and for sharing!

My daughter is so skinny too that it also worries me. But her pediatrician assured me that it is okey since my daughter doesn't get sick and in fact quite healthy. I can't even remember when did she catch any colds. The last time I brought her to the her pediatrician was when she had a fever but it was due to her teething and it was years ago already. As to my niece, I am confident that she is getting the nutrition that she needs because we are quite sneaky when it comes to feeding her. But just the same, she still thinks that she is dieting.

Maybe she does. But her mother and I don't talk a lot about our weight problems at home. It's the opposite in fact. When we are at home, we seem to be more boisterous eater because we cook what we just love to eat and indulge ourselves since its not always that we get to eat what we want to eat. I guess it could be from the cartoons that she is watching when we are not around. I have told my sister already what cartoon s she should not allow my niece to see because they really are not good for kids. Your suggestion sound wonderful and I will tell my sister about it. Thank you very much!

Thanks very much for your very encouraging words and compliments. I believe that with all the love that she gets and with all of us helping her, she would really turn out okey in the end. Thanks again!

I hope too that she would get over it soon. We are doing the best that we can to make her realize that she is fine as she is. Thanks for responding!

She doesn't actually lack projects. She has lots of books, drawing materials, DVD's to watch, cousins to play with and even some computer games. But when its eating time, she just don't eat much and tell us she is not hungry or just won't eat.

I am really alarmed by her behavior and what she might be thinking but I know that she knows that she is loved because we are quite demonstrative when it comes to expressing our love for her. Thanks for responding!

I am really surprised how many girls at that age are now conscious of their weight. I asked around and I was surprised by the answers. I just hope that as parents, we could really reverse such way of thinking. Thanks for responding!

Thanks very much for your inputs and suggestions. We do try our best to reverse her way of thinking. We have already started screening the cartoons that she watch, telling my daughter and her grandparents to never even tell her that she is fat and if somebody calls her fat, they should be corrected right away. She is about to have her booster soon and we plan to call her pediatrician in advance and ask him to tell her that she is okey and not fat since she would believe whatever her pediatrician tells her.

She does watch cartoons that feature teenagers such as Sabrina or Kim Possible and those 4 detective school girls whose title I forgot. So we now limit their TV time. I told my sister to, to specify what cartoons what her daughter should only watch since we are not always around. I also had the same experience as you while growing up and I grew up being told fat and called a pig by my playmates. I had already told my daughter to never call her cousin fat because when she was asked if she called her cousin fat, she did own up to it. Honestly, I now think that it could be the fault of my daughter too who may consider her fat because she is just also so thin. We also called the attention of my parents who are always with her to never call her fat or even healthy. So both reasons that you have mentioned may actually have influenced her somehow. Thanks very much for your very helpful input and thanks too for sharing!

More likely. She is a pretty shy child. I also suspect that she wants to look a certain way like my daughter who is thin. I hope she gets over this soon. Thanks for responding!

My sister and I have the same built with my niece so she isn't the heaviest in the family. However, my sister and I have been called fat so many times and in her presence by our much smaller and thinner relatives. We are all helping her to overcome her way of thinking and I hope she would come to realize that she is so okey the way she is. Thanks for responding!

I am actually afraid that it might turn into a teenage obsession. My daughter is into gymnastics and is very slim. I know that she wants to dance and even do some gymnastics. I even suspect that she is on diet because she thinks that she is too fat to join. I heard her say once that she wants to be like my daughter and I immediately told her that she is just fine. As of now, we are giving her food supplements and even appetite enhancers so that she would eat. However, she still doesn't eat but just drink lots of milk. Thanks for your thoughts and suggestions and for responding.

I am not yet ready to accept that she got that from us because her mother and I may be concerned about our weight were not that worried about it. Our diet is limited to eating the right kind of food and not really about eating less. Maybe she got it from her cousins too. I just hope that she would get over it. We do give her vitamins and food supplements everyday and she drinks a lot of milk. However, I still find it not normal for a 5-year to control herself in terms of eating the food that is supposed to be yummy for them.