difference of opinion
difficult topics
discretion is the better part of valor
discussions
heated exchanges
Don't start nothin', won't BE nothin'?
By gardengrrl
@gardengrrl (1445)
United States
June 3, 2007 7:23am CST
I was looking for friend's discussions to comment on last night, found one from a person who has taught me a lot about how to be a better myLotter. It was abortion from the prolife perspective, which can be a dangerous topic to weigh in on. I read the discussion, which quickly deteriorated into namecalling and other undesireable things. Fool that I am, I put my two cents down (abortion from a naturalist's perspective), which received a quick and mildly snarky rebuttal. I had carefully crafted a firm but not mean response, and the dang discussion was deleted as I wrote. GRRRRRR!
I was thinking about it later, and I realised that all the people who had been sniping back and forth in that deleted discussion seemed to know each other, to have debated this issue heatedly in the past, and they seemed to completely lack respect for each other. The person who began the discussion felt abused and belittled (had every right to!), even though they seemed to know what response they'd get before they started.
So, my question is, if you've spoken to a topic a number of times, know it tends to generate heated exchanges, and you are absolutely not going to change your opinion on it, why start the discussion? If you know you're going to end up with your feelings hurt, why go there? I'm not endorsing censorship, I'm only talking about giving yourself a break! Sometimes its best to let it rest, no?
2 responses
@Destiny007 (5805)
• United States
3 Jun 07
I agree.
There are some things that I will not talk about...religion being the main one. There is just no point in discussing it.
There are things I hate talking about...politics, gay issues, child support and custody issues, and abortion.
I went from a 7 to this 4 in the space of a day and a half after voicing my views in a gay related discussion.
I have firsthand knowledge of child support and custody issues...been there, done that, and took a royal screwing that I will be another 4 years paying off.
People don't want to acknowledge that the system is flawed and unjust towards the noncustodial parent.
I just plain hate politics period.
It is frustrating and maddening, and is very close to talking about religion.
Even with the facts shown, people will stick with their beliefs, and to be perfectly honest, prior to joining myLot, I had become so disgusted with the political system that I completely dropped out.
I should have stayed out, because nothing has changed.
I have a very strong belief as to right and wrong, and have found that there are very few discussions that agree with my belief system.
I have even had problems with a simple conversation on caring for a fish tank.
On top of that, some over-educated idiot actually posted that if you don't have a PHD to back up your opinion, then the opinion is without merit...or words to that effect.
Frankly, I don't need the aggravation, because nothing anyone says is going to change a damn thing in the world.
All most of these discussions have done is raise my blood pressure and royally annoy me, and I really don't need it in my life.
Far too often I will answer a post carefully and as precisely as possible, and the next thing I know somebody will either take something out of context, or come up with something so far out that the only possible response is a liberal application of blind unreasoning violence.
I haven't yet decided what I am going to do, but like I said, I don't need the aggravation.
So yeah, I tend to agree.
1 person likes this
@whiteheather39 (24403)
• United States
3 Jun 07
Great topic. I agree with you. I have a couple of friends and some of their discussion I do not respond to. I read them and as I usually do not get around to posting until most of the discussions are a few hours old (this is an exception)they are already at the nasty stage. I know they will probably be deleted or even worse I will make an enemy who will attempt to sabotage me (already experienced that 3 times with a stalker). However I can't keep my mouth shut when it comes to illegals and immigration I always get hot on these subjects.
1 person likes this



