Temper
By jhoannapena
@jhoannapena (342)
Philippines
July 5, 2007 4:17am CST
Its not easy being a parent to a child who is very active. How do you control yourself when your child is not obeying or listening to you?
I need advise. Please!!
3 responses
@wmaharper (2315)
• United States
5 Jul 07
well, I think the key is to take some time for yourself. you cant spend every second of every day with your child, and expect to be at your best all the time. Children will wear you down on occasion, they can be loud, disrespectful, messy, sticky, rude and frustrating all in the same moment! (of course they have many wonderful attributes too!) See if you and your hubby can take turns (or a friend with children) and you watch the kiddos for a couple of hours one week, and then he/she watches them the next for a couple of hours, so you can get some much needed "me-time". Also, with whatever discipline technique you are using, stay consistent! Use it for every offense and don't be hesistant, or your child will pick up on that, and take advantage of it. When you notice YOUR temper beginning to flare, call for an immediate time out for everyone. THe kiddo goes in her room, you go somewhere to calm down. Also, deal with the misbehaviour immediately, instead of waiting to deal with it until you can't handle it anymore.. That way, you won't reach that point as easily. As a mother with a previously horrible temper, I know how hard it can be to deal with children who are disobeidiant, and simply won't listen, but you must keep yourself in control in order for the situation to not get out of hand.
1 person likes this
@jhoannapena (342)
• Philippines
6 Jul 07
"Me-time" that is something I wish i can do. I always bite off my husband head when he forgets to discipline our daughter. He is a spoiler and I am the disciplinarian. Therefore, that makes me the bad person sometimes.
I don't think my husband knows that I need sometime for myself. I only get those when my daughter is sleeping and sometimes he distracts me. Being grouchy and grumpy should have given him a hint that I need some time off.
Don't you think?
1 person likes this
@wmaharper (2315)
• United States
6 Jul 07
well, although i think my husband should get the hint when I follow behind him picking up the dirty clothes he throws on the floor, he doesn't. (;
YOu really just need to tell him. The beauty of this arrangement is that there is something in it for both of you. I would approach it like this, "honey, I'm really tired, and I'm beginning to become overwhelmed. I don't want to resent our duaghter or take anything out on her, or you, and I really need a break. How about if we take turns, because I'm sure you could use some time away as well, and once a week we each get 4 hours (or how many ever you want/need) to ourselves to do whatever we want and go wherever we want?" He may surprise you and be as excited about it as you are, then you can go do what you want (no errands allowed, it is simply your time to do what you would like. You will come back home with a new appreciation, and when you get home, your hubby will have a new appreciation for you, TRUST ME! Last time we did this, i left around dinner time, my hubby was amazed when i returned. He said, how do you do it? You manage to keep both boys occupied AND make dinner? It really has shed some light on what I do.. and they wont understand why they need to be strict with discipline, or why you need a break unless they have a chance to expierence it themselves!
Good luck! I hope you get a much needed break.
@kristypants (305)
• Canada
5 Jul 07
All that you can do is take a deep breath and remain calm. When you show that they're getting to you, some children will just do it more because they like the reaction. Also, follow through with the same punishment for the same offence, EVERY TIME, and then they'll know that they can't get away with anything. Good luck!
@rapolu_cs (1184)
• India
5 Jul 07
Kids are kids an dthey change with their age and their behaviour changes with the time or with their mood and my kid is not the one who doesnot listen to me and he is very obidient to me and till now never faced such situation and i think you make her obey you by convincing with your sweet words and tell her that you are going to give her a gift,or chocolate. Hope this would work,all the best.
@jhoannapena (342)
• Philippines
6 Jul 07
You're lucky you for having an obedient kid. Honestly, I tried that but it doesn't always work.
Maybe its the voice? What do you think?
