I just have to rant!
@beautyqueen26 (16030)
United States
July 13, 2007 1:47am CST
Just got online and it's almost three A.M. First time I've had a minute to get online all day. I spent the day caring for our kittens and kid, and finally got some time to drop by to post on My Lot. And, wouldn't you know it, the hubby woke up from his two hour nap and poked his head into the door to see what I was doing.
I know that he's going to want to boot me offline and spend the next seven hours surfing the Internet. He's got a little vacation time off from work, so now I never get to spend time online.
He stays up all night and way late till morning most times and then sleeps all day. It's driving me nuts. Then he gets really sarcastic and snippy if I say anything and I mean ANYTHING at all about him staying up so late.
And, even after spending all night on the computer, he expects to be able to randomly get onto the computer at any hour of the day or night, even if I'm working.
And, if I tell him to wait, he sulks and stomps out of the room, and won't speak to me for three hours.
Amd, then he acts like he doesn't understand why I'm not making money at My Lot anymore. I don't know why it's such a mystery. He's hogging the computer when I'm awake and after I go to sleep. I just don't have time to post anymore. Thus, no money.
I guess I'm just ticked cause he should be doing something more useful with his vacation time than surfing the Internet. I'd like to hit the beaches while the weather is still good, but by the time he wakes up at six PM, it's way too late. And, we had been planning to do more with our home business so we could have a little financial independence. As is, that's not going to happen. I just don't know what I am going to do with that man.
5 people like this
15 responses
@mummymo (23706)
•
14 Jul 07
Sweety I understand exactly why you need to vent - men can be really irritating and insensitive - even without trying to be can't they? Maybe he has something weighing on his mind and I would try and find out if that is why he is behaving this way. No matter what though you can't let him away with making you so unhappy and you have to sit him down and explain how he is making you feel - you are exhausted and need some help - it is time for him to stand up and be a real man! xx
1 person likes this
@beautyqueen26 (16030)
• United States
14 Jul 07
Thankyou mummymo, for your words of encouragement. Sometimes I am better at expressing myself with the written word than verbally. I will have to change that!
@carlaabt (3504)
• United States
13 Jul 07
It sounds like you need another computer! My husband would probably do stuff like that if we only had one computer, too. I do several different programs that pay online, so I spend a few hours online everyday. My husband will sometimes say something about having to take care of our son in the evenings so I can finish stuff up (especially if I have a deadline for one of my articles). But if I don't work a lot online, he complains that we aren't saving enough money. I think men just think that since they work OUTSIDE of the home, their work is more important, so they should be able to do whatever they want during their off time. They don't consider the fact that we never really get any off time, especially if we work as well as taking care of our children and pets.
1 person likes this
@beautyqueen26 (16030)
• United States
14 Jul 07
Thankyou so much for bringing that point up. Yes, it's true. Some men just imagine their jobs are more real because there is a definite paycheck attached.
Working online is more like a sales job that pays strictly commission. There are no guarantees. Except if you stop, you don't get paid.
@cynddvs (2948)
• United States
13 Jul 07
I was wondering why you have been so quiet lately lol. Normally you are posting discussions like crazy. Guess you'll have a lot of catching up to do when your hubby goes back to work. Sometimes men just don't get it. I would tell him to keep himself awake and on a normal schedule for a couple of days so you can enjoy his time off together and go hang out at the beach or do something fun. I know I am dying for a mini vacation and hoping my fiance can take a few days off soon. I would love to be able to take a weekend to go to the beach.
1 person likes this
@beautyqueen26 (16030)
• United States
14 Jul 07
We talked about it later, and he is going to try to do something like that. We just have to work out a schedule so he can have some fun online and I can get some work done. Thanks for the suggestion. And, yes I will have to play catch-up all over the place. LOL! But, I'm getting lots of house work done lately, so that's not a bad thing, I guess!
@tinamwhite (3252)
• United States
13 Jul 07
I can understand you feeling "put out".....surfing the net is not really my idea of a vacation...LOL
Plus the disruption to your work has to be irritating, my friend....I wondered where you had been....even in my fog...I noticed your absence....
He will return to work soon and life will mellow back out...you will be able to meet your quota, once again....
1 person likes this
@beautyqueen26 (16030)
• United States
14 Jul 07
Thankyou my friend, for asking. You are so sweet. I've been taking a little time off from My Lot to spend with my daughter and husband.
My little girl is growing up way too fast and I am missing all the best parts. There was some sadness in our lives the other day and I haven't stopped crying since. I feel as if I've been dragged over ten miles of bad road. The experience made me realize that I can't afford to lose a minute with her or him.
And, sometimes I might be mad at him, but he doesn't feel the same toward me. So, what am I really mad at?
Please drop by anytime you need to talk to someone. Or, send me a private message. I'm a really good listener. Be well. And, take care.
@DanaMark (807)
• United States
13 Jul 07
I'm sorry to hear how things are going for you. I'm sure you look forward to your husband being on vacation. Vacations are for doing things you normally can't do. It sounds like his idea of "things you normally can't do" is different from yours. I hope before his vacation is over you will be able to enjoy something together.
@beautyqueen26 (16030)
• United States
14 Jul 07
Thankyou very much DanaMark! I guess I must have been pretty mad at him. I'm OK with it now. I was just venting. Thanks for dropping by.
@gr8life (6251)
• Malaysia
13 Jul 07
Hello beautyqueen26,
It seems that you were very angry when you typed this discussion. I can understand why you felt that way. I guess most guys are like that. You can see me here on My Lot because my husband is not around at the moment. If he is at home, I don't even have a chance to put a finger on the keyboard!
No matter what we have done, they always think that they are more tired, more hardworking and more things to do compare to us, women. In fact the truth is, we are multi-taskers and all rounders!
1 person likes this
@beautyqueen26 (16030)
• United States
14 Jul 07
Isn't it the truth! As women, we have a full plate when it comes to taking care of the family and earning a little extra money. I get around to posting on My Lot in my spare moments. I don't just hang out all day. I've got a little kid to take care of. And, it's not like anyone else is volunteering to help with the housework. Well, actually my three year old is pretty good about helping out. So, when I get a half hour alone online after she goes to bed, I want to spend that time doing something fun.
I am sure we will work out a schedule that will give us both some time online, so that we can also spend time together as a family. Maybe I will just wake up earlier than everyone else.
@gabs8513 (48686)
• United Kingdom
19 Jul 07
Well Sweetie no disrespect to your Husband but I think he needs to grow up and start taking his responsibilities more serious
He should not be sleeping all Day he should be spending time with you and your Children
I do hope you can get through to him
@mkirby624 (1598)
• United States
13 Jul 07
It sounds like your husband seriously needs to grow up. He sounds like a college kid who stays up all night and sleeps all day. Very immature.
@Marie2473 (8512)
• Sweden
13 Jul 07
I would definately also wanna rant if my bf acted like this. If you both are off now you should be conentrating on doing stuff together to feel the love again. Like us aid - going to the beach and stuff like that.
I would go crazy if he slept that long and stayed up all night.
1 person likes this
@AmbiePam (85448)
• United States
14 Jul 07
I'm so sorry. It sounds like you are having a really hard time, when you should be able to relax and enjoy being with your husband on vacation. That is, if you want to be around him. No where does it say you have to be, LOL. I wish men were more open in communication. Perhaps if he truly listened to why and what is going on, you both would be able to enjoy his time off. As it is all I can say is I'm sorry, and I really hope things get better. : )
1 person likes this
@cynddvs (2948)
• United States
13 Jul 07
I was wondering why you have been so quiet lately lol. Normally you are posting discussions like crazy. Guess you'll have a lot of catching up to do when your hubby goes back to work. Sometimes men just don't get it. I would tell him to keep himself awake and on a normal schedule for a couple of days so you can enjoy his time off together and go hang out at the beach or do something fun. I know I am dying for a mini vacation and hoping my fiance can take a few days off soon. I would love to be able to take a weekend to go to the beach.
@Perspectives (7131)
• Canada
15 Jul 07
Hi again beautyqueen26
Personally, I think ranting is a great way to blow off steam...better out than in.
I am unclear about what you and your hubby do..but whatever it is the dynamics feels a little lop-sided in the equality department.
My hubby has been feeling a little 'wife-deprived' this past month because I have spent a lot of time...Mylotting. However, we are chatting about it and he can see how much fun I am having. Also we communicate ideas for a living through my free lance news reporting, workshops, life coaching etc. He is also a computer specialist and we also work from home. My keying speed has improved, I've made great contacts, earned a few sheckles and I am enjoying many stimularing conversations. So...we are okay.
Anyway I am wondering if there is a way you can sit down together and figure out a goal-setting, goal-getting agenda? My hubby and I each have our own home offices and computers so sharing time is not a problem..becasue we don't have to. With only one system mabye you need to sit down and figure out a schedule..he has a few hours in this segment. When the time is up you ring a bell...and boot him off. Visa versa for him if you are cutting into his designated time.
We learned the hard way how easy it for the personal and business life to merge without some structre and planning. It worked for us...hopefully you will find a solution..and still have some time for fun in the sun. Keep us all posted...and good luck with busines ventures...wishing you every success!
@magicalmerlin (1623)
•
13 Jul 07
I do sympathise with you. We are a bit the other way around here. I am trying to understand making money from the internet and the other family members think I am just 'playing'. They have to throw me off to get a go themselves!!! I will show them when it all comes to fruition. Then we can spend our time on the beach whilst my downline members make money for me!!! Would you like to be one of those!!!
