Should i be upset with my daughters Principal??? I am so upset!

United States
September 28, 2007 1:14pm CST
OK so my daughter is in the first grade. Shes six years old and loving it ! She isnt daddys little "princess" shes daddys little "slugger" so to speak... well since school started back up my daughter doesnt get to see her dad AT All mon-friday, due to his work schedule coinsiding with the school schedule, except for a quick kiss in the morning... and he goes in and kisses her when he gets home from work. So saturdays are our family errand , birthday parties, fair beach what ever days and sundays are "daddy daughter days" they go fishing and do yard work, he helps with her homework, they make dinner together etc etc. He also does the bed time reading adn tucks her in.. Now before school started as far back as i can recall maybe since she was old enough to walk each night before bed they had a specail time together.. they would run around the house throwing rolled socks at eachother, tag, and "fight time" were they would wrestle etc etc. well since school started my daughter has been extra whiney .... last sundaythey were playing around and she fell off the couch and hit her cheek on the coffee table.. he went to apologize but she threw drama fit said "you hate me that hurt leave me alone" and she went to her room. i went in to make sure she was alright, well not even 5 minutes later she was asleep.. i didnt even realize it was so late! well i went out to the living room and he asked if i was done so he could go talk to her, sorry shes asleep.... well he felt so horrible he wroote her a note.. its said " gabby. i could never hate you, you are my most favoriteset person in the world, i didnt mean to hurt you in the living room, im sorry, wake me in the morning beore oyu leave for school. I love you, love daddy" well she was so excited she took her note to school wiht her favorite toy in her little pocketbook , i didnt htink it was a big deal she takes all her "specail things" to school with her.. WELL she came home crying freaking out... screaming and yelling its not fair its not fair.. i asked her what had happened.. she told me her teacher took her note from her daddy away and sent her to the office, asked her if her daddy beat her, told her he was going to go to jail!!! There was a cop there that took a picutre of her cheek "just incase something bad showed up" they told her. and then put it in her file . I didnt get a call, a note or anything telling me this had happened that day. First of all they had no right taking a picture of her face did they? and even so there was nothing there not even a red mark? Who are they to tell my 6 year old that her daddy is going to go to jail ??? BUt more so WHAT DID THE NOTE SAY THAT WAS SO HORRIBLEY WRONG?? im so upset.. i complained to her teacher, made them give my daughter back the note... of course they photcopied it and put it in her file. they told me this was standard procudure... Now my husband is afraid to play with his daughter! Everytime she falls or bumps into something he makes me check to make sure she didnt scrape her knee or bruise herself!! Its so sad...
7 responses
@lilybug (21107)
• United States
28 Sep 07
I think that the school had a right to be concerned, but I also think that they should have called you and asked you about it, and let you know what was going on. I feel bad for all of you esp. you husband who is afraid of playing with your daughter now.
• United States
28 Sep 07
i can understand to an extent precautin measures... BUT there was nothing in there that implied he beat her.. and there was no mark on her face to substaine anything... shes 6 they shouldnt have threneted her dad in jail.. and yes i feel horrible for my husband as well
@lilybug (21107)
• United States
28 Sep 07
I agree that they should not have said that to her.
@ravinskye (8237)
• United States
28 Sep 07
Wow. Its really sad that things came to that. I would be upset that the school didn't call you. I think I would even consider going after the school for all that. I can't believe they told her that. And the sad thing is some kids understand about abuse and use it against their parents to get what they want. (not that your daughter would) I've heard kids already tell their parents they would turn them in if they didn't give them something.
• United States
28 Sep 07
Yes i know... its terrible.. well she has atempted to use that one me, if i yell at her she will say " dont do that the cops are gonna get you" Or i grounded her from outside yesterday because she came home with a "being disrespectal Note" and she said " no i dont want to be grounded, dont hit me you will go to jail... " i was like i sent you to your room how is that hitting you?" im soooo very curious as to what else was said to her, it seems to me there is more to it then waht i am being told... shes just totally not herself since then
@SViswan (12051)
• India
29 Sep 07
I understand the school being concerned (what with all the child abuse cases we hear). But this was taking things a little too far, I think. The teacher could have talked to your daughter about what happened (before assuming that her daddy beat her) and taken a decision according to what she said. The next thing that they should have done is talked to you or your husband to let you know that they knew and were concerned about your daughter's safety. Whatever the situation, the teacher cannot tell the child that her father is going to jail. They should have handled the case without having it affect the child in anyway. I think you should talk to the school and let them know the outcome of their 'standard procedure'. Daddy's scared to play with his daughter and if they think that's okay.
@tanjam420 (228)
• United States
29 Sep 07
i cant believe they did that to her..and you.. i would be very angry with the school myself.. well you have the note back, so i would go the the school board and tell them what went on and make it clear that they didnt even give you a cll about anything befor ethey went as far as they did. hopefully something will be done from that end as well. also let them know that your husband and child are afraid to play. and that is putting great stress on all of you. the schools are always saying they are protecting the best interest in the child, well this is in the school boards best interest to get this taken care of and go for disiplinary actions on the principle and the teacher who blew it out of perportion.. that is what i would do. i have called the school board or district a few times.and have got some results. give it a try... and i hope things get better for all of you.
@aowaow (1516)
• Indonesia
2 Oct 07
the school rules is in right place, we cannot doing just we like to do when kid is studying at school. Rules are meant for everybody's sake. the wrong is the person who take the note and give a wrong implementation to your kid, by scaring her. She is just a small kid, their mental is very vulnerable. This is unacceptable to me, kid psychology is very fragile, they didn't like us adult. We still can see things by looking at two sides, but kids are different. Once they are implanted with scary stuff, they will swallowed it in a piece, and it will need sometimes to heal before they find it out in their journey of life. I might complained this stuff to the head-school, not seeking his/her apology. Just at least, told him/her find a right teacher for a right place.
@smileymom (169)
• United States
29 Sep 07
i think before they came to thier own assumption they should've called you and asked if there was a problem. for them to take your daughter's note away and making her think her daddy is going to jail. they should've called you to come into teh office and talk about it. the whole take a picture of a cheek i think that was probaly the only right they had and maybe not because they did it without your consent.
@mamasan34 (6518)
• United States
29 Sep 07
I think the school right to be a tad bit concerned about the note. I mean look at it from a strangers perspective. If you would have read that letter and didn't know the family, with dad saying I am sorry I hurt you in the living room. That kind of jumps out. Regardless, I am very shocked that you didn't hear anything of it. It was very wrong for them to say that her daddy was going to jail in front of her! That was totally wrong and I would request to speak with the principle and the offending person. That is unacceptable. While they have a concern that should be dealt with, that was totally inappropriate to say in front of your child!