Was it good for you?

I grew up with a lot of cuddles and kisses . My Dad threatenesd me with his miners belt ( he never used it ) the taught me right from wrong and did my homework with me , they taught me all I know , I gave my sons the kisses and cuddles to andbrought them up the same way , they got a smack if needed though and it ddin't do them any harm , I still have my Mam and Dad who now both have Alzheimers's , I look after them in their own home and we are still all best friends , I would wish that everyone would grow up in a home like I did , lol I can stop now pal xx

I had a most lousy childhood. I never got encouragement, help with homework, cuddled from anyone other than my grandmother and I can't remember hearing the words, "I love you". It was hard growing up and at times very lonely but I am forever grateful now. My past has taught me many things. One of my parents worked very hard and I took that as good advice and followed it through. I learned how hard it was feeling not loved and I turned that in the opposite direction. I already knew how wrong it was to have three or four kids and not enough love to go around, so I chose to have only one. The lord blessed me with a little girl some 35 years ago and it was then that my life got good. I worked hard but I raised her as a single parent. I never missed a school function, I always encouraged her, I always had time to hear what she had to tell me even if I didn't like it or agree, I cuddled her always and to this day I have never went one full day without telling her "I love you". We live in different towns and both have our own lifes therefore there are many times we have to talk on the phone, but I will not live even one day without her hearing "I love you". I was never afraid of my parents but I never knew if they really wanted me or not, I thought not for the most part. When you think about this, everything we know we had to learn from someone else. I learnt to be a loving caring parent and I credit that to a poor situation I lived by. Happy New Year MsTickle.

Well, always being overweight most my life didn't help in the self-esteem portion of my life it set me up for a pretty lonely life of only having a few friends. I still have low self-esteem. I learned to value myself by my weight and what I could do and what others thought of me. My mom had me on diets alot growing up nothing seemed to work though. I think I was the only kid at school at a young age packing a salad to school at the time and diet everything. My tried to help me. Well, my step-dad was hard working and always thought us kids should work on the farm just as hard as he did we had so I had alot of chores outside and inside of the home. I learned to cook by the time I was 8 years old. No I wasn't given alot of freedom possibly reason I married by the time I was 16 years old. My mom was more easy going then my step-dad who I went toe to toe with him a few times but got knocked around for it. Mom was always trying to protect us. I don't really remember my mom whipping me actually I don't ever recall getting whipped till my mother got divorce from my dad and married my step-dad 2 years later. She is still trying to leave him but she can't make it alone with no money,education, or car and health problems. My mom helped me with my school work I made C's more often then not until I had a teacher actually sit down to explain it all to me then I started making better grades. I can't do the new math they have nowadays for kids. So I know she had to have been struggling to understand the stuff I was doing especially the math. Yes, I was loved and cuddled as a baby and young child till step-dad came he was strick and never cuddled us. My mom told me many times I was a great kid till 13 then I got a little rebellish because I was tired of it but getting my jaw knocked only made me hate him which I told him when I was 17 that he couldn't hit me or mistreat me no more because I was married and if he touched me I would call the law and that I hated him for the stuff he put me through. It has took about 10 years for me to even start forgiving him for things he put me and my family through and I had to do that for peace of mind and for God.I used to be able to turn to my mom for anything but lately she has changed, now I cannot. She used to be my human diary I could tell her anything and everything and not have to worry about being judged. She was my best friend growing up. My friends loved my parents especially my mom. I miss that alot.I think the way she is now hast mostly to do with her being diabetic and having had a brain tumor and health problems. Do You know how lonely it is in a world with no friends or family to turn to? Yes, I am still married but it is not the same. My husband doesn't hit me or drink thankfully that was 2 things I told him before marriage that he couldn't do. And that was 17 years ago. and he hasn't.

I always new I was well loved but my self esteem was still very low. I don't know why. My parents were very loving and helped me all they could. School may not have helped me as I was considered a 'slow learner'. Since leaving school I have found that I was never a slow learner I just couldn't keep my mind on what they were trying to teach me. Nowadays this would be described as a 'grasshopper mind'. I would begin a subject and start reading and find something else more interesting. My parents encouraged this sort of learning but schools never did. It wasn't until I had my first child that my self esteem began to rise.

My self esteem was HORRIBLE as a child...in fact pretty much nonexistent...through my teens and into my 20s it was like that as well and actually got worse from childhood on...The turning point for me was in my mid 20s when I started this final shot at healing from all the abuse...by the time I was into my early 30s there was and is no stopping me LOL...Of course I have moments and times when I still feel less than but I think everyone has days like that ya know...Back then it was ALWAYS feelign like hell and hating myself etc..

Hello Doll, My Da was a hard working man..wo9rked a 40+ hour job and had his own business that he worked at late into the night..My Ma was a stay at home mom that never even drove a car..She wouldn't leave the house without discussing it with Da prior..She was there waiting when we got off the bus..We helped with chores,and we always had supper on the table when my father got home so he could eat and go out to work... My parents did not help us with our homework..that was our job!..We could ask for advice but had to work it out...Like I said it was our job!...I never remember being hit except one time by my Granmama because I spoke french which was one of her tongues but we were not allowed to do or say anything foriegn because she took such pride in being an American( she married an American and thus became American!) I was not afraid of my parents but I was afraid I might make them sad if I did the wrong things but still did them anyway.. My parents were good salt of the earth folks..Kind..always lending a helping hand..poor but always had something for someone poorer then we..good people..honest people..Their word was good as a sign document and a handshake sealed the deal..the likes that do not live in this world anymore! I could have turned to them when I was in need but I always stood on my own two feet! xoxoxoxo

I had a pretty good childhood, my parents were (and are) allways very supportive of me and there when I need a helping hand. I can turn to them with any problem I may have and they will do anything in their power to help me. They consulted me in hard times and gave me freedom to explore the work. Helped me plan my homework but after that it was my own responsibility. They provided the neccesairy invironment for me to learn. They were a bit to protective I guess, I had a hard time building up my self esteem. They tried to get me better socialized in lots of ways; inviting kids from school, taking me to playgrounds hoping I would feel more comfortable talking to other kids when they are around, etc. But hey, you can't get everything right as a parent + you are a human being yourself so you won't be perfect either no matter how hard you try. All in all I consider myself very lucky.

I was an only child, in fact a miracle child, as the doctors told my mother she couldn't and mustn't have children because of her condition she had at the time, so I came along, I was loved and yes, spoilt more so by my mum, dad didn't have much time for me, and it was always mum who I turned to, looked towards and respected and admired, it was mum who made me the person I am today, and I owe so much to her. I could always confide in her, she is also a friend to me as well which is important. If I needed advice, anything she would be there. Always is to support, guide and love me.

Until high school I lived with my parents. It wasn't an easy life but it wasn't the hardest either. I was kinda naughty so my father beat me up a lot. I was very good in school so my self esteem was pretty good, and it remained this way until this day. When people around you appreciate you, it's just natural to feel this way. My mother helped me with my homework when necessary. My father is unable to do that being really stupid and drunk most of the time. From high school I had to leave home (there is no high school or college there) and the control from my parents decreased to none. I tend to solve my problems without turning to my parents.

my parents were very scrict and the put me down on everything i did unless we were in front of people and then they played the act of loving parents. then when i had a daughter of my own they then treated her like i wanted to be treated and trew it in my face. so needles to say i dont talk to my parents that much.

I think most of my development of character is done through the help of my parents, my education and all. My parents have been very encouraging all through my life. But now adays sometimes i feel they are not so much encouraging me to get ahead with my career the way I want it to be. They want me to settle down and then see what happens in life. But I am little spectical about it as it may ruin my career .

well now ms tickle I will tell you the truth.I loved my parents with all my heart until they passed away, how ever they knew nothing about my homework,I was on my own ...My parents did work hard, i can say that..They were not strict at all, mother did not have to be strict , she had the perfect plan and that was she scared me of everything, so i never did anything wrong because i was scared too..no i was not punished, i was scared into minding..I was loved yes , by my daddy and my mother..I was not afraid of my parents.I was stuck right up under my mother shirt tale...She watched me like a hawk.If i got cut, she would doctor me because i might get an infection and die..I could not go swimming because i might drown..My mother had lots and lots of fears, you would not believe the fears she had, and she transmitted them all to me...I was very sickly when i was a child, if i was not sick my mother would find something wrong with me....I was a lot older when i finally matured...It was years before i could leave my Mother and be my own person.I knew my mother had all the answers...I lived real close to my mother until i was older and my Mother was 88 years old when she passed away and i was still always right there for her and near her..When my husband wanted to move , i had to stay close to my mother, we were very close...I miss her and daddy a lot, but i realize that mother had some fears and a lot of things she passed on to me, but she could not help it..my mother was a good mother and my daddy was a good daddy..

I wouldn't repeat my childhood for anything in the world. I was blessed to have a loving gentle step-mother who raised me but Daddy's rules stood firm. An example of the self esteem I grew up with was my father telling me at the age of 15 that I'd better hold on to my looks because I didn't have anything else going for me! I was a straight A student and very well liked by teachers and fellow students but ..... what my father said stuck with me for years into adulthood.

I was fortunate to be blessed with wonderful parents(not by birth) who spoiled me rotten, Ms Tickle. Although my uncle was overly strict, my aunt somehow managed to maintain the peace between us as I grew into my teen years. They were always there for me and If I wanted anything that was in their power to give me I only had to ask for it. They taught me much about life and how to be a good person-and my uncle even helped me with schoolwork sometimes.

wasnt afraid of my parents nor did I turn to them much for help. I just worked it out the best I could and went on from there .

I have to say my parents were good to me. They have done the best they knew how. It could have been much worse. I know they love me and have been there for me. Still, I suffer from a lack of self-esteem. This has been my problem forever. Thinking I am not worthy or as good as others. It is all nonsense, because there is no one to judge us otherwise. All of us are deserving and worthy of the best in life. It is getting to believing that that is sometimes difficult.

I think I am lucky to have got very nice patents. They have been very supportive all throughout. They have helped me in growing up as a human being. My mom was strict and at the same time provided me all the freedom so that i can learn from it.My mother mainly was behind my study and career. My father also likes me to grow uo the ladder in life.

Now that i have a family of my own, i learn to value myself, my family, my children, my life. When i was growing up, my parents were not there for me, so i learned to be independent and i learned things in life the hard way, but i have to say i manage well. Now its my time to nurture, its time for me to give love and shape the future of my kids, i intend to them lots of love, a love that i never had and have always wanted...but i will never change anything in my past because it made me who i am right now.

My self esteen didn't develop very well at all MsTickle. I can already see by the comments already that you've opened up a can of worms here, this discussion is going to be very interesting to all of us! My mother raised my 2 brothers and me on her own, and we lived with my grandparents. Things were hard for her in those days financially, and my granddad was very mean and controlling with my mother. However, I was a happy child in spite of never getting cuddles and kisses from mum, no story-telling at bedtime, and no encouragement from her or my grandparents. I wasn't scare of mum, but I had a healthy fear of her! She never hit us - a look from her was enough to bring us to tears! I was brought up with the attitude "speak when you are spoken to" and "children should be seen and not heard". As a result, I grew up with very low self esteem, quiet as a mouse, and very introvert. Mum never came to school to parents meetings, and it always upset me; I thought she didn't love me, because she knew school was important to me. I never had any help with my homework, I had to struggle through it alone - but that made me want to learn more, and I ended up being an A grade student! I vowed I would not bring my kids up this way, for I feel I missed out on such a lot of affection.

Although I am an introvert, I have a pretty high self-esteem because my parents were really encouraging and supportive of me since I started going to school. Since, I was the eldest, I was given enough attention. I also did well in school which made my teachers notice my positive traits. Although I have a high self-esteem, I do not belittle people. I respect everyone no matter what their status in life is.