Do you let your kids attend Birthday parties empty handed?

United States
February 6, 2008 7:42pm CST
My daughter is invited to a birthday. Party it will in fact be a sleep over. The parents will be picking her up and dropping her off. Now you all know I am not too free with my daughter. She is however new to school and having fun. I don't let her go to any party empty handed. So Now I am wondering why I would have to spend more money. I already bought her sneakers and her Valentines gift to give out. Along with the same persons birthday coming a week after v-d. So he gets two gifts in one month. Should I let her go with a juice purse Or $20.00 or with a nice card and a smile or nothing is needed. I think a cute purse would be nice. :) Thanks for the help.
8 people like this
16 responses
• United States
7 Feb 08
It depends on your daughters age. I limit my 12 year old to a $20 spending limit getting her friends birthday gifts but my sons who are 5 and 6 are limited to $10 for gifts. Even if I can't find them a gift in that price range I get them a nice card and a gift card to a toy store or some where like ice skating or something like that.
4 people like this
• United States
7 Feb 08
Thats very nice of you. :)+
1 person likes this
@KrauseHome (36733)
• United States
7 Feb 08
Well, I feel that when you are invited to any type of party or Celebration, if it is for one certain individual, the best thing to do, is bring a present for the child involved. I feel it would be Rude to not have a present, but at the same time, I do not feel price should play an important part either. Just make sure it is something that you know that child would like and appreciate.
• United States
7 Feb 08
I think all 13yr olds love cash.
1 person likes this
@Rozie37 (15499)
• Turkmenistan
7 Feb 08
You said, "He gets" two gifts in one month. What would a guy do with a juice purse. I hope that was a typo.
2 people like this
• United States
7 Feb 08
Oh your so funny. I guess I said it wrong. She is invited to sleep over a girls house. Then there is this young boy who has two gifts to receive one for valentines. I bought already..then his birthday a few days later. :)
1 person likes this
@lucy02 (5017)
• United States
7 Feb 08
Lol, I was wondering the same thing. Glad you cleared it up.
1 person likes this
• United States
7 Feb 08
Oh i definitely don't do that. Kids look forward to the gifts, not the food, especially kids of today. I just wouldn't feel right sending me children to a party without anything. Even if i just put a few dollars in a card, that would make me feel better personally.
• United States
7 Feb 08
Your so right I would not want to send ME children to a party empty handed. LOL Your so funny pm me.
1 person likes this
• United States
7 Feb 08
I am somewhat confused...so you already bought the birthday person a gift? If this is the case i would just give a nice card and a treat(chocolates/cookies). I wouldn't let my kid go with nothing, just because it's embarrassing. Well good luck, I hope they have a great party!
2 people like this
• United States
7 Feb 08
I bought the valentine gift already.. The two birthday gifts are not bought yet. A girl at her school and a boy at her school. :)
1 person likes this
@sminut13 (1786)
• Singapore
7 Feb 08
it feels uncomfortable going empty handed somewhere you've been invited. it might be different here and there but still, for me, my son's 5. so when he's invited, i usually tend to send some money in an envelope with him for the birthday child as that is most necessary and easy. also, they always tend to inform us late so can't go and buy a gift. but if the children are quite young, i think buying a gift with reasonable price would be better as children tend to look forward to gifts rather than money. $20 is also too much i feel but i don't know how the rate is there so i can't say much on that. hehe but do give something rather than going empty handed. that would be kind of embarassing.
• United States
7 Feb 08
Thanks very much I am thinking of cash as well. $25.00 in a envelope..
1 person likes this
@cherriemae (3374)
• Philippines
7 Feb 08
my child is only 3, when she's attending birthday parties, i let her bring some nice presents for the birthday celebrant, i dont let her give money..sometimes, if i will go with her, i will buy some gift then she's the one giving it to the celebrant..i think, it's the thought that counts, but it's better to bring something..
2 people like this
• United States
7 Feb 08
yes I am with you here. I find my daughter never gets gifts. It's a good thing I always go over board or she would feel real bad. One party last year she got two nice gifts. It was a pool party at our house. I miss Florida and those pools. :)
1 person likes this
@whittby (3073)
• United States
7 Feb 08
I think the purse might be nice, but your daughter would know what this particular girl would like as far as the purse goes. she would know if the girl would use it or like it maybe? You can't go wrong with a gift card inside a card. I try for inexpensive cards around $1.00 if I can find a cute on. I think a $15-$20 gift card inside the card is appropriate if you can afford it...whit
• United States
7 Feb 08
yes I can spare it. I am finding it too costly becasue its three gifts this month plus. Rewards my daughter has received for a job well done. I am going to ask her to find out about the purse. :)
1 person likes this
• Australia
7 Feb 08
I would feel uncomfortable going to a birthday party empty handed. May be a small present would be good.
2 people like this
• Canada
7 Feb 08
I always send my daughters with at least a gift card. If we don't know the child that well and are unsure what to get her, we get a gift card so that they may buy what they would like or what they need. I put a limit on the amount too depending on the age of the child.
1 person likes this
• United States
7 Feb 08
no i do not that isnt right to show up without a gift
1 person likes this
@Debs_place (10524)
• United States
7 Feb 08
My son always had well to do friends, I always seemed to be behind and not able to afford much. My son made origami frogs that we wrote Happy Birthday on --- saved money on the card. Then we got an inexpensive gift that the kid would like. One kid got 3 geodes - total cost of $4. Mom - said it was his favorite gift, could not wait for the kids to leave to get the hammer to find out what the inside looked like. No one got him rocks for his b'day and he loved to collect rocks. THink out of the box.
1 person likes this
@crazynurse (7489)
• United States
7 Feb 08
I always tried to send my children with a small gift when they were invited to a birthday party. The birthday child gets really excited for their special day and I think it is a kind gesture. When times were tight, I would often get a card and enclose a McDonalds $5.00 gift certificate booklet in the card (what child doesn't like going to McDonalds?!) or a movie ticket or pass to a local store that rents videos or a free movie rental certificate from Blockbuster. These weren't as expensive as a twenty dollar gift but the birthday child did receive something from my child.
1 person likes this
@Gemmygirl1 (2870)
• Australia
15 Feb 08
Well, it's hard because you spent money already but you did infact spend the money on your daughter so buying a gift for a friend's birthday isn't a big deal - more so because a birthday is far more importnat than V-day so you might have to choose your gift days wiser in the future :) I guess something like a purse & perhaps a lockable diary or maybe a little gift basket with things like hair accessories etc would be perfect - you can make them yourself & they don't have to be expensive. Good luck but i'd feel rude & awful if i went to a birthday party empty handed.
@chrislotz (8200)
• Canada
12 Feb 08
No, a gift is enough. I think that the person who has invited her over might feel insulted if she brought something else, besides a gift. The person giving the party will take care of all the refreshments so don't worry about it and don't send her with anything else. This is just my opinion.
@SViswan (12071)
• India
12 Feb 08
Well, it's not the child's fault that they were born close to Valentine's Day....lol I wouldn't send my child empty-handed....maybe a small gift...something smaller than what I would have given if the birthday didn't come close to Valentine's day. Or maybe a bigger gift and a card on one of the occassions.