I think I've just learned a mylot lesson
By kbourgerie
@kbourgerie (8780)
United States
February 23, 2008 6:14pm CST
In several discussions recently there have been mention of various sitations which have occurred recently on this site. "One word answers", "bashing", things of this nature. In these instances, I have said "Well, gosh, that hasn't happened to me, I'm sorry you are going through this particular situation" or something to that effect. Well, having said that, next thing I know these individuals find their ways to my posts. First of all, I'd like to give every credit in the world to those who have pierced their own tongues in an attempt to keep cool. I honestly, don't know how you have done it. What I'm wondering is by responding in the manner that I have, that I was unaware of these predators, do you think I gave them an open invitation to do the same to my posts or do you think they just take turns with all of us as they see fit? I couldn't imagine coming on this site as a new poster and being that blatantly disrespectful. My suggestion to these would be mylotters is to sit back and read each discussion thoroughly before you respond. Not to begin posting here by attacking the person posting unnecessarily until you are much more well established. Chances are people will not take it kindly and in turn will not give you the chance to earn the respect you'd like to be given. I understand that there is always going to be a difference in opinion on many subjects, but to just come off initally as unkind and hateful is not the way to get started on any site regardless of the subject matter.
11 people like this
19 responses
@gabs8513 (48686)
• United Kingdom
24 Feb 08
There are a lot of them on this Site
No you would not have drawn them to you they would have found you anyway
There is a lot of it going on again
I just wish it would be looked into deeper as so many People are being done wrong by this
@wolfie34 (26770)
• United Kingdom
24 Feb 08
and vile too, I had a disgusting response today from a newbie, a total attack on me, I have asked Mylot to remove it, but 9 hours later it's still there!!!!!!!! I am angry because discussions are pulled so damn quick by trolls and yet a respected member like me complains and nothing is done grrrrrrrrrr
2 people like this
@kbourgerie (8780)
• United States
24 Feb 08
I've noticed it quite a bit too and I don't like it at all. I just can't tolerate rude people.
2 people like this
@kbourgerie (8780)
• United States
24 Feb 08
You of all people Wolfie deserve respect. You always post good discussions and respond in the same manner.
@sid556 (30953)
• United States
24 Feb 08
I am in 100% agreement with you. I, too, sometimes am not very detailed with my answers. some topics really don't require much response. Still, I do not answer with..."good" or "lets talk" or something silly like that. As for the hateful attackers...I haven't dealt with them but i have seen it. Even when I disagree with the person, I try to be respectful. I think reporting them and ignoring them is the best way to get rid of them. Responding to them ( and I have in the past) only seems to fuel them up even more. Some people seem to thrive on negativity.
@kbourgerie (8780)
• United States
24 Feb 08
I understand what you are saying, but in the instance that caused me to write this post, it just was so unnecessary, had nothing to do with what I posted and was extremely hateful to Americans. I have a problem with that.
1 person likes this
@balasri (26537)
• India
24 Feb 08
I have gone through a situation like this a couple of times here. A forum is a place where you can throw a hypothetical question on any issue to know the response from various corners. As the discussion maker has every right to ask anything under the sun the responder also has the right to have his own opinion on that discussion. Underline opinion. Not a personal hatred towards the person who raised the issue. If you have any opinion, underline opinion you just post it. If you don't have any please forget it and keep moving. It is as simple as that. The problem is with the immaturity. Most of the people from some places do not understand what a forum is and they are in a hurry to be personal trying to show off their English typing knowledge. It is really a sad situation.
1 person likes this
@kbourgerie (8780)
• United States
24 Feb 08
I absolutely agree that everyone is entitled to an opinion, even if its one that I don't agree with, but to respond in a manner that doesn't have anything to do with the post and is completely hateful is unnecessary.
@wolfie34 (26770)
• United Kingdom
24 Feb 08
I was hit today by a newbie who left something rather upsetting, I am not religious and don't want other people lecturing me on my activities thank you very much. I am a little annoyed that if I do a discussion that is inappropriate my discussion is pulled so fast but when I report a disgusting response nothing is done about it, unless Mylot hq is not open on a Sunday but I find that hard to believe. I tend to ignore nasty, vindictive responses but this one is pretty foul x
1 person likes this
@kbourgerie (8780)
• United States
24 Feb 08
Now you've got my interest peaked, which discussion was it? Have a look at the discussion I posted about the customer service skills of employees. First page about half way down and you'll see what I'm complaining about.
@arkaf61 (10881)
• Canada
24 Feb 08
I have been lucky so far, but I have witnessed some cases like you are mentioning. And I do completely agree with you, people sometimes come out as if they're mad with the world and us as well. And no, it's certainly not the way to get started on any site.
1 person likes this
@kbourgerie (8780)
• United States
24 Feb 08
How can you come on the site, be hateful and expect anyone to take any of your posts seriously? I don't understand why anyone would think they could get away with that.
1 person likes this
@arkaf61 (10881)
• Canada
24 Feb 08
I used to think that it was probably younger kids, still immature and still learning their social skills.But when I checked the profile on some I found out that it wasn't only younger kids - at least not according to the profiles.
I guess what I learned among other things is that I have to remember that immaturity is not only something that had to do with age, and that even adults often lack social skills:)
@ctrymuziklvr (11057)
• United States
24 Feb 08
I've read quite a few responses to my discussions that I don't appreciate and I usually just go right by them not even rating them. If they are going to be mean and bash me then they don't deserve any rating as far as I'm concerned. I think there are some people who join mylot just to be mean and it's just in their nature.
2 people like this
@raijin (10345)
• Philippines
24 Feb 08
I thinks it's the way they post their opinions, as sometimes it's also hard to choose the appropriate words to use in expressing ourselves. Also, there are moments or situations where some people are just out there to ruin your day. As if, they don't care nor think of what they say and just continue on doing what they want no matter what the results of their actions may end up into.
I have seen a lot of those and shared some as well, but I always make sure that my opinion is based on what I know and not because I want to step on someone else' point of view.
The thought of contributing on this community is what I always put in mind, I don't have to rude nor negative just to tell the world that what they are doing or thinking is wrong..
1 person likes this
@p3halliwel2005 (3156)
• Philippines
24 Feb 08
You are so right in what you say.People have different points of view in each discussion that we make. We have to respect ech others opinion even if it's not the opinion we expected to have or like. This is a discussion we are doing and we have positive and negative sides to it. People just have to learn to understand that.
@kbourgerie (8780)
• United States
24 Feb 08
Different points of view are ok, thats what makes the world go round. I have no problem with that. I do have a problem with hate.
@Sissygrl (10909)
• Canada
24 Feb 08
If someone answered my post with only one word, then i try to initiate more of a conversation with them, but they usually dont answer!! I think they are under the assumption that they get the same earnings per post no matter how many words or the quality of their posts! Boy they are mistaken!! I usually give them a - after a while if they dont answer.
The rude people. I just either ignore their response, and leave it unrated, or if its REALLY rude which i've never really had since coming back, i'd give them a - and not respond to them but just move on to the next one ;)
@kbourgerie (8780)
• United States
24 Feb 08
I don't ever give a negative rating, but you better believe I did in this case.
@maddysmommy (16230)
• United States
25 Feb 08
Aargh those type of responses irritate me but I still walk away. I have on occasion answered back though because they have caught me in a bad mood LOL
@kbourgerie (8780)
• United States
25 Feb 08
Most things I can handle, but every once in awhile a comment will evoke a strong response.
@kbourgerie (8780)
• United States
26 Feb 08
You are probably right, just the luck of the draw or the first post he saw that he felt he could be so ugly in.
@xXxMikesWifeyxXx (3072)
• United States
24 Feb 08
Honestly, i think they join the website just to do so.
because they know we go by ratings now. word has gotten out. they just wanna come in here and cause trouble. it is funny to them.
And now that i think about it. what is that website called.ytmnd? they make it a habbit to find websites like this online and do things like this.. to get a responce, these youngsters get a kick out of it.
ive experienced it while wokring on chacha.
so anoying!!.
@gerald_lian (2188)
• Australia
24 Feb 08
I had this experience of posting an answer to someone's discussion sensibly and logically. Unfortunately when I checked back later to see his response on my answer, he said that my answer was retarded and I was a moron. I feel that this is unacceptable because once you start a discussion, you are expecting people to answer to it and give credit to them regardless of their answer because they actually took the time and effort to come up with an answer. Why post a question or discussion when you are just going to attack the person who answers? I hope these type of mylot members are banned from the site.
1 person likes this
@kbourgerie (8780)
• United States
24 Feb 08
Thats pretty much how I feel also. If you can't give an opinion in a kind manner then you shouldn't be here. There is no reason for hatefulness, no matter what your opinion.
@clowdine (1402)
• Philippines
25 Feb 08
While many faithful mylotters whether introvert or extrovert communicate and meet minds, sadly some people are abusing mylot. They have found a new bullying ground and a vacuum to their insecurities, frustrations, and bitterness in life under the cloak of "opposing views" and freedom of expression. They simply defeat the purpose of mylot's noble task which is to channel people in intelligent discussions that will benefit everyone in the process. They never realize that there is always a better way to disagree without being rude or sarcastic.
@RebeccaLynn (2256)
• United States
24 Feb 08
This has been going on for a while on Mylot. There aren't many people who will do that but there are definitely a few.
I don't think they are truly newbies either. They have been banned for one reason or another and come back under a new name to carry on their hatefulness.
I found out the hard way that it is a mistake to get into it with these people. Just go about posting and completely ignore them. They WANT you to argue back. Don't do it. You choose to get upset at what they have said. Don't. Just pass them by and keep enjoying yourself. There are far more kind, caring people on Mylot than there are bad apples. Happy Posting!
@kbourgerie (8780)
• United States
24 Feb 08
The one that I felt justified in responding to has yet to see fit to give another answer. LOL. Thanks Rebecca.
@ESKARENA1 (18260)
•
24 Feb 08
I wonder if such disrespectful newbies are in reality banned users coming back under a different name. It would certainly explain the way in which they target individuals
blessed be
@kbourgerie (8780)
• United States
24 Feb 08
I don't know why they would have reason to target me though, I've never had a problem with any member here as far as I know.
@drannhh (15219)
• United States
24 Feb 08
I don't understand why a myLot member would think it OK to bash someone for giving one-word answers. Seems to me that would be between myLot staff and the one-worders and if it really bothered them they could report, but bashing should be just as much a violation as one-wording in my book, probably much worse. Some people do not have much else to do, apparently.
@kbourgerie (8780)
• United States
24 Feb 08
I guess not, but if you have a negative opinion, at least share it in a post that it is appropriate to and not just any willy nilly.
@asawako48162 (3321)
• United States
24 Feb 08
Yes,there is all kinds of people in the forum but most of them I see are normal and just want to have fun, pass the time, or make friends and a little money.
When I post I try to think like how would you tell a friend or family member what you are thinking on any given subject.
Thee are always going to be people who will be "spoilers" and "immature" types who will do their best to cause trouble. You get these everywhere..Even when going to church people will say the dumbest things to you and then they wonder why you don't want to come back? Well sometimes I am more thin skinned then others and I try to ignore these negative types as most people on here are nice...like you..
Keep up the good work. The blue star and the red stars usually don't have the bad post..but the lower you go on the star number the more problems that seems to come up..correct me if I am wrong. Thanks ..have a nice day.
@kbourgerie (8780)
• United States
24 Feb 08
Thank you for your support, encouragement and friendship as always. I don't stand for alot, but I am patriotic to my country and the particular comment I refer to was hateful in regard to Americans and in my book completely unnecessary.
