People that dont drive

Australia
March 13, 2008 9:25am CST
I will need your honest oppinion on this guys. I am 27 years old and I dont drive if I can help it I never want to drive. I have problems with my eyes its something that operation or glases wont fix. Technicly I could drive acording to the tests that the licence people do but I have dificulty judging distance, lights are too bright and just looking at another car's headlights makes my vision worse not to say what sun light does and I cant wear sun glasses as I cant see properly. Now I get lots of comments from people things like "oh you are not trying or everyone has an issue with light or you will get used to it" lots of coments hurt as it is not because I have not tried I have and I simply dont feel safe behind the wheel I put my self in danger, put my son in danger and people on the road. Am I selfish for not driving? What do people think of people that dont drive in general?
7 people like this
13 responses
• Philippines
13 Mar 08
I don't drive either, and I am 25. I do wanna learn, though. I don't have a car, and when I do, I would, of course learn how to drive. I don't see why people would give you hurtful comments, just because a person doesn't know how to drive, doesn't make anyone less of a person.
3 people like this
• Australia
13 Mar 08
the thing is I have learned how to drive I had few lessons before I had my learners permit but I noticed how many problems I had driving and gave up. I have been told that my son will resent me and be shamed of me for not driving that hurts the most.
2 people like this
• Philippines
13 Mar 08
If you are a good parent, then I don't think your son will resent you just because you don't know how to drive. The reason is too shallow. Is your son that shallow? I don't believe that. I mean, you are concerned about him, and I am pretty sure that he will understand.
2 people like this
• Australia
13 Mar 08
my son is only 4 he dosnt care about it at all.
1 person likes this
@raijin (10373)
• Philippines
13 Mar 08
For me, I don't drive because I don't own/have any car. I wish I could, hopefully one of these days I'll be a student driver. There are drivers here in our country which are blind, believe they only rely on their instincts. They even drive public transportation vehicles, have professional licenses and can veer through congested roads and streets without even having or causing an accident. I guess people resort to this type of work, for their means of living.I envy them, as much as they earn my respect. I don't think that you're being selfish here, you're just thinking of other people's safety like the one's you love. Maybe someday you can overcome that fear you have inside, just try learning how to drive once in a while for you will never be sure where you'll need it in case of emergencies..
• Australia
13 Mar 08
I belive what they have is legaly blind which is different from been blind. I am not scared of driving as such I cant drive with what I have Imagine walking and thinking there is 5m infront when in fact there is 2. with smaller distances its even worse. or looking up and there is a car coming the other way and you look up at the lights and not been able to see properly for 30 seconds.
1 person likes this
@Sissygrl (10914)
• Canada
13 Mar 08
I dont drive and i am 27 as well. I dont think you are selfish!! i think you are being cautious like i am, and i always say its better safe then sorry!! If you dont feel comfortable doing it then dont do it :) I am scared to drive because of all the crazy people on the road. It would just make me stress out way too much. It sucks not being able to just get up and go anywhere.. but it make my life less stressfull this way ;)
2 people like this
• Australia
13 Mar 08
lots of times I wonder how it would be to just get up get in the car and drive to the shops instead of waiting for my husbend to drive me there. If there wasnt the added stress of the other drivers that drive like lunatics I might get a licence and drive short distance where I know there is not a lot of traffic.
1 person likes this
• Canada
13 Mar 08
I am 30 and I don't drive but my husband is always at me to do so and my Dad always wanted me to the thing is that I went for five road tests and wasted a whole bunch of money on lessons and I just don't like driving!!! I admit, there are times I wish I could but I really don't like driving and don't think that it is for everyone! My Mom has never drove and she will be 60 in the summer.....There is nothing wrong with not driving Many people have hassled me over this and I get very upset when they do....I definitely understand where you are coming from! ~Heavens~
1 person likes this
• Australia
13 Mar 08
yes lately everyone has been on my case as well expecially my husband they just dont get it and I dont think they ever will. My father is ok he is legaly blind so he understands how I feel.
2 people like this
• Canada
28 Mar 08
Congratulations on the BR heavenschild!
1 person likes this
• Canada
29 Mar 08
Thanks Mom and thank Violeta! HUGS ~Heavens~
1 person likes this
@cher913 (25865)
• Canada
14 Mar 08
well i dont drive and have never got my license - when i was younger, my parents fought over the car, so i wouldnt have had a chance, then we had no money to get my license, now i have a lot of problems with my knees... who really cares what others think? i live in a city and can take the bus for free (i use a quad cane) so who cares?
1 person likes this
• Australia
14 Mar 08
you are right but when people play with my emotions it gets to me.
1 person likes this
• Canada
28 Mar 08
I too have problems with my knees, among other health issues, so driving for me now would be out of the question. I'd be a hazard on the road, and although people 'still' hassle me about this, I know what's best for myself, and the safety of others. At my age, I think I've finally learned to just ignore people trying to force me to do things I'm not comfortable with.
• United States
27 Mar 08
I dont drive either :( I think its very hard not to drive today esp if you have children but I guess the fact that we still get our kids where they need to be without driving makes us stronger people? I do want to drive but have no one to teach me so maybe someday it will happen for me but right now at 22 Im ok with it, its just alittle annoying sometimes
1 person likes this
• Australia
28 Mar 08
you are right 110% it is hard not to drive say 50 years ago public transport was the main way of geting everywhere. So it was more regular and everyone used it. Now if I want to use public transport to take my son to school (its about 4km away) I have to walk 1km to get to the bus than catch 1 bus that will take me to about 1lm from the school and then I have to wait for another one or walk there. Its a joke it would take 1 hour to get there.
1 person likes this
• United States
14 Mar 08
don't lissten to the people who tell you that you SHOULD drive for any reason. i used to drive 1500 miles a week or more and i liked to drive. But now i am older and can still drive but don't like to drive great distance from my home or in city traffic. I let someone else drive if possible. My wife learned to drive and can drive very well but she insist that I drive on vacations and any trips either local or long distance. The problem is on the whole is I am suffering from fatigue and sleep apnea and also I cannot handle stressful situations very well. I have been involved in accidents that were out of state and it is not fun to be hit by another car. In the end you and only you can judge your own feelings. If you lack the confidence is one thing but you have other issues with your eyesight that must be considered. I would get the advice of a professional in these matters not a layperson. Good luck. I still drive but think you would be doing yourself a great injustice in driving.
1 person likes this
• Australia
14 Mar 08
my doctor tels me that only I can judge if I can drive or not he said that I should never drive anything but car and this was some years ago.
1 person likes this
@SViswan (12071)
• India
14 Mar 08
In fact, you are not being selfish at all....you are being sensitive to the safety of your family as well as the other people around you. I wish others were as considerate as you...and didn't drive when they are having problems. Lots of accidents could be avoided. Well, I'm 32 and can't drive...not really can't...I've never learnt....my mom and granny stopped me at 18 when I wanted to and then my hubby comes up with all sorts of excuses for not letting me learn. I'm not sure how good I will be...but I can't say till I try....and if I pose to be a danger to ANYONE, I, like you will not drive.
1 person likes this
• Australia
14 Mar 08
my mother got her licence when she was almost 50 and I am proud of her. My father is legaly blind (he lost one eye and has problems with the remaining one) so before that he had to drive us all in that state but he is confident and in all these years driving he never had a crash. I have a family friend who was in the same situation as you she sort of wanted to drive but her husband was against that. So she did it in sicret and once she got the licence she told everyone.
1 person likes this
@ayou82 (3460)
• Philippines
14 Mar 08
Well there are some people who have that fear of driving. Theres nothing so wrong if you dont know how to drive.. Just imagine a guy who is in military but so chicken to drive or learn how to it is because he dont feel like learning it he wants to be the passenger instead.
1 person likes this
• Australia
14 Mar 08
One thing that freeked me out the most was when I was working I was told that if I have licence I would have to drive the work cars and mini bus or they can let me go. I worked in the disability industry.
1 person likes this
@wisedragon (2330)
• Philippines
14 Mar 08
Have you tried laser treatments? Maybe it will help, I don't know. Anyway, if you are having problems with your vision then you definitely shouldn't drive. Even with a normal vision it can be difficult to drive during bad weather or in the dark. And why would it be selfish not to be driving? You're even helping protect the environment by using public transportation. And with oil prices out of control, that's even more important nowadays.
• Australia
14 Mar 08
The problem that I have had to be fixed by the time I was 7 or 8 at the latest but my parents didnt notice how bad it was. What I have is a condition similar to lazy eye where one eye takes over for the other eye. You know when we see the vision is devided 50/50 but in my case its more like 75/25 so when one eye takes over you have problems. Imagine having 2 good eyes and you put glases infron of one and try doing the normal things that is how I see but since it was from birth or maybe from the braind damage I had when I was little my brain dostn register that there is something wrong and I dont know any better.
1 person likes this
@lucy02 (5017)
• United States
14 Mar 08
No you are not. It would be much more selfish to drive and put other's in danger. I have trouble at night and don't drive then if I can help it. I also don't drive on the interstate in big cities cause I freak out. I have a certain amount of driver anxiety. I take antidepressants and it helps but there are still times and places I will not drive.
1 person likes this
• Australia
14 Mar 08
I understand that there comes a point in life when you have to make a decision. I belive I would have to drive one day as much as I dont want to. I have told my husband in that case I would have to get the smalles car in the world so I can see every angle around me but I will only drive where I feel safe and short distance and only when I have to. You see even with my issues they dont have a problem giving me licence they think I am fine they dont care if I kill someone.
1 person likes this
@dreamy1 (3815)
• United States
13 Mar 08
You have a legitmate reason I think. I would not want you to drive either if it comes to safety. I would not want you or other people to get killed because you can't see well. If you did not have a vision problem and there was no reason other than you didn't want to then I would think a lot differently. I know two older people who never learned to drive. For me driving is freedom. You don't have to depend on anyone to get around you can get up and go whenever you want. But in your case I think you made the right decision. If you explained to reasons why to people who might question you then I think they will see that you are right.
1 person likes this
• Australia
14 Mar 08
Some people dont mind not driving so people should not judge them for that. untill few decades ago it wasnt that big of a deal anyway. I have explained my situation about 1 million times and I still get the looks when I say I dont drive I still get the comments or "you are joking" thing what is so unusual about it I dont need to drive to survive.
1 person likes this
@lingli_78 (12841)
• Australia
13 Mar 08
i can't drive as well and i am never confident behind the wheel... so i let my hubby drives me everywhere i want to go or take public transport... i agree with you that it is much safer... we don't put other people's lives in danger as well... so it is a very wise decision from you and i don't think people should make hurtful comments about it... just ignore them...
1 person likes this
• Australia
14 Mar 08
Thanks my fellow non driver its nice to have reasuring words.
1 person likes this