Setting Boundaries With Mom
April 21, 2008 9:20am CST
I have trouble setting boundaries with my mom. She doesn't seem to understand that I need my space and privacy, and she keeps trying too hard to be my friend all of a sudden, like we are buddies. Yet our relationship has been a far cry from that, for I feel she puts me in an awkward position that I never should have been in. To explain, her mother treated her like dirt, and now my mom still looks for that love. Yet I am her daughter, and hence not responsible for her, and she doesn't seem to get that. She treats me like a spouse instead by befriending, beguiling, and manipulating me from my own wants, needs, and concerns. I think she actually expects me to look after her. What should I do? What would you do?
21 Apr 08
Well, knowing what she's doing to you is half the battle! You should probably talk to her about it openly, but if she turns on the tears or tries to manipulate you just ignore it! My mum never was close to me, yet she is always trying to manipulate me and do things I don't want to, telling me "how much she has done for me". I just want to scream and remind her how much stress and paid she put me through and remind her I DIDN'T WANT HER TO DO IT FOR ME! I made THAT much clear when I was younger, for sure!