What position do you take in your romantic relationships?

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I have been rethinking the position I took in my relationship. In the beginning of our relationshop I did everything for my man. I cooked, cleaned, made his appointments, I even took his shoes off when he came home. I did these things to show him that I was a woman who takes care of her man, her whole family. I wanted him to see that I had his back. Well, I think it worked too well. Its now 4 years later and he has gained fifty pounds because he doesn do anything. I have tried to talk to him but it seems to come out as if I dont love him as much as I did in the beginning. That is the farthest thing from the truth. He is my world. He keeps me solid. I still want to do things for him, but when I want. He will literally wait until I come home to fix something to eat. That bothers me. I want him to need me not rely on me to live. I try to stop doing things and he thinks I am trying to leave. Our relationship is great. I have seen alot of terrible things come out of loving relationships. I was very careful when I chose a mate. I researched my soul and his personality and it worked. I love him so much. I dont want to lose him. I just want him to do things for himself sometimes. If I am sleeping or out, make a sandwich. Am I alone in this ladies? Or Gentlemen? What position do you take in a relationship?