How do you offer your consolation?
By catmint
@catmint (628)
Singapore
April 28, 2008 12:56am CST
When friends are feeling downright sad and they come to you sniffing, how do you comfort them?
I am really bad at offering comforting words, and I may just burst into tears myself. Neither am I a touchy-feely kind of person so I don't hug someone no matter how close I am to them.
But I realised that what I do best in these kind of scenerios is to make the opposite person laugh. I distract them by bringing up topics or subjects they like or love and cracking cheesy jokes about them. I haven't fail in making my sad friends smile every time. I know it may be for just a moment, but a moment is better than none.
I guess I must first know my friends well enough to know what makes them beam quickly.
What about you? How do you comfort friends who are feeling under the weather?
2 responses
@monishavakil (1019)
• India
2 May 08
oh i am a good listener. most of my friends say i am. well i am not too good in consolations, other then saying i am sorry. i do not believe in sympathy but empathy. i like to give friends the strenght to move on.
@katbalu102 (377)
• Philippines
29 Apr 08
well for me it depends on who the person im consoling, i wouldnt say im a very touchy-feely person as well. but i have friends that im really close to that we hug and do the 'kiss cheek to cheek' thing when we see each other. but then i have friends that dont do that as well. ive had experiences like this and to my close friends if they start crying i analyze the situation not for a long time though. i heard from my sister that hugging a person and letting them stop crying is not really very healthy. i dont know why, i'll have to ask her about it again later on. but i too have that mentality sometimes, i just have to let them cry it out a bit and then when she stops crying i hand my friend a tissue and ask if she is okay and if she can talk. but there are times that you just gotta give her a great big hug to comfort her, because honestly people do need hugs. who doesnt need a hug, its all about 'the human connection' in a way. and then we would talk it out. and sometimes saying nothing would be better. saying its ok. is just the best thing.
