I Think I'm Going to Become A Homosexual

By JJ
@myklj999 (26930)
May 17, 2008 12:25pm CST
No, not really. But it just amazes me that many people think that this is something that others just "decide" to do. I personally have never met anyone who just decided one day "Hey, I think I'll be gay now". I don't think there is a "cause" of being gay; I think some people just simply are. And that is fine with me. I've met many different kinds of people in the strange and slightly bizarre journey that we call life; most of them, even though they have different beliefs and values than I do, are still just basically pretty good people. But the point of all this rambling (and to make this an actual discussion) is: do you think that being "gay" is a choice people make, or that they just are? And I promise not to rate anyone negative unless they start all the name calling and junk like that.
13 people like this
16 responses
@foxyfire33 (10009)
• United States
17 May 08
Yep, I'm going to become a lesbian on my birthday this year! It sounds like fun to be harassed and ridiculed and discriminated against! I also can't wait to be shunned by some of my church going friends and family! I hope you all understood my sarcasm. Being gay is not a choice just like being dark skinned or left handed is not a choice. It justs happens and is not a flaw. Yes people can choose to experiment, but their true orientation always was and always will be there...some people just have different methods of reconciling that within themselves.
6 people like this
@Adelida2233 (1008)
• United States
17 May 08
Lol. You certainly got my attention with your title(but I'm assuming that was the point, so great job). My dad is gay, and he and I both do a lot of volunteer work for the LGBT community. I do not think that being gay is something you just "become" one day. I think many people may see it as that way because they had a hard time with the coming out process and are now able to live like they want instead of feeling like they are in hiding. Like I said before, I was getting ready to flame you just for the title of your article. Thankfully I actually read the rest of what you wrote, that would have been embarrassing. :)
@inked4life (4227)
• United States
17 May 08
I have a bunch of gay friends and they all laugh at the notion that this was something they chose. As they said, why would they choose a life where they are universally shunned, beaten and given fewer opportunities than heterosexuals. Anyone who believes it is a choice really has to take the time to talk to a homosexual or 2.
3 people like this
@jerzgirl (8058)
• Gloucester City, New Jersey
18 May 08
Exactly! No one chooses a "lifestyle" that can get you killed (as has happened in some areas of the country).
1 person likes this
@wooitsmolly (3613)
• United States
18 May 08
Of course I don't think it's a choice. People who say that are ignorant, sorry to say. Okay, I'm not sorry. I just think the whole "omg ur gay u chosed to sin. god hates u, u know? plz stop being gay" thing is pointless. It doesn't turn anyone straight and when people try to change because they are so afraid of going to hell, they just end up effed up from it and scarred for life.
@sweetdesign (5151)
• United States
18 May 08
Well actually I have met someone who decided to be gay for awhile. Actually he kept changing his mind. He also went through the "I'm a transvestite" stage. Now he is married, to a woman and has 2 kids and says he is not gay it was just a phase he was going through. On another case I knew a lady who had been married for 15+ years woke up one morning decided she didn't love her husband any longer and got a divorce and started dating women. Said she had never had feelings for women before although her twin brother was homosexual she never felt she was till after she divorced her husband. I don't mean to offend anyone and if I do I apologize but I do not believe in the theory that homosexuality is genetic. I believe that we all make choices in life whether they are concious choices or not whether we admit that they are choices or not we all make them.
2 people like this
@myklj999 (26930)
18 May 08
The last line in your post reminds me of one of my favorite quotes: "If you choose not to decide you still have made a choice."-Neil Peart
1 person likes this
@cyntrow (8524)
• United States
18 May 08
That's my favorite Rush song.
1 person likes this
• United States
19 May 08
And it is true.
1 person likes this
@Reesers (1387)
• United States
17 May 08
Whatever thoughts I have in my head right now have already been covered, especially by foxfire. No one in their right mind would want to bring that kind of pain on themselves just for the fun of it. So no, I don't think it's a choice. We have no control over our hearts. We just go where they lead us, whether it's men, women, or both.
2 people like this
@foxyfire33 (10009)
• United States
18 May 08
thanks Reesers!
2 people like this
@II2aTee (2559)
• United States
20 May 08
It really is silly to think gay choose to be gay. My two main reasons for finding it foolish is 1- So you mean to tell me, that every gay person who says they were born gay are liars? We just want people to understand us - we arent trying to fool the entire world. Just because you dont understand how we were born gay does not mean we dont know who we are. I've been me for 26 years now - I think I would know by now if it was a choice. And if it WAS a choice, I would admit it. Why lie? 2- Homosexuality would be EASIER to defend if it WAS indeed a choice. Everyone has lifestyle choices. Everyone gets to choose their religion and thats perfectly acceptable. Someone could decide to live on fast food and weigh 400 lbs and no one says they cant. People get to decide their home, car, career - our entire lives are built on choices. So why then, if some people do in fact CHOOSE to love someone thier own gender, does it all of a sudden becaome everyone business, and everyone gets to pass judgment?
2 people like this
• United States
18 May 08
Nobody in their right mind would "choose" to be gay. It's tough enough to get by in this world without adding the ridicule, alienation and risk of physical harm. People are born the way they are born.
2 people like this
• Regina, Saskatchewan
17 May 08
Most are 'born' that way, some become so by choice. I don't really care how they come to it, as long as they truly believe it's more natural for them than any other lifestyle. Because it is NOT an easy lifestyle by any means. I've known many many gay people (mostly men) over the years, and I'm serious when I say, I want my next room mate to be a gay man.
2 people like this
@cyntrow (8524)
• United States
17 May 08
I think it's great that you finally made the decision to "become" homosexual. I only decided last year that being a heterosexual was the right choice for me. LOL. Yes, it's silly. Who would choose to be ridiculed, beaten, put out by their families? It's a ridiculous notion to say the least.
2 people like this
@Pose123 (21666)
• Canada
17 May 08
Hi myklj999, I'm with you on this one all the way. I have a brother who is gay, and I know it wasn't his choice. I also have friends who are gay and I have no problem with that. I believe that those who refuse to accept the fact that gays are born that way, are those who take the Bible, or some other scripture literally. I'm not opposed to religion, it has helped and continues to help many people, but some just accept what they are told, instead of figuring things out for themselves. Blessings.
2 people like this
• United States
18 May 08
Well, I did. One day I woke up and decided I was going to be a lesbian. It was not difficult at all. I just focused on a different aspect of my nature. Now I'm either, or, or none, it makes no matter because my true love is life, in whatever disguise. You people believe that it's not a choice because you believe in 'victim'. You have 'learned' that unwanted things can 'happen' to you. And, yeah, they can, if that is where your attention is focused. Like, if you're resisting something, your attention is still on it and it has the power to attract to itself more that matches it. If you don't want something you have to take your attention off it, or come to a less resistant position relative to the subject. We all of us contain the seeds of all things in our beingness and what you focus on acts like a prayer and all prayers are answered, so every thing in your life - your body, your relationships, your circumstances, your beliefs - are all a choice that you have made, and are making, with your attention.
1 person likes this
@myklj999 (26930)
18 May 08
Well, I must say you are the very first person I have met that says it was a choice they made. That's why I started this discussion, to get opinions. Thank you for replying so honestly.
1 person likes this
@cyntrow (8524)
• United States
18 May 08
Zig, I must ask; You said you focused on a different aspect of your nature. This would lead me to believe that you are attracted to both genders. Is this the case?
1 person likes this
@anniepa (27248)
• United States
17 May 08
Your title startled me a bit too! There really isn't much I can add to what you and others here have said other than to say I agree totally. I'm a left-handed heterosexual and I didn't CHOOSE to be either and nobody can switch me from either. A good argument for when someone "accuses" a gay person of having chosen to be so would be to ask if they chose to be narrow-minded. Annie
1 person likes this
@foxyfire33 (10009)
• United States
18 May 08
...loving your last line!
2 people like this
20 May 08
If sexuality were simply a choice then why when it gets really difficult for people socially would they not just decide right back again - 'oh actually today I'm going to be straight, no ridicule for me please!' It doesn't work like that because although it can be hard in some cultures to be gay, and with certain people who will not accept that 'way of life' gay people cannot then just change their preferences at whim. That'd be too easy. But then again I suppose you could also say that they shouldn't have to even if they could, and that maybe this is why... Hmm.
1 person likes this
@olivemai (4738)
• United States
17 May 08
I agree! I think people are getting their issues mixed up, if they think there is any choice in this issue at all! We would never say that someone cannot get married because of their race, so why should we say that gay people cannot get married?
1 person likes this
@ZephyrSun (7385)
• United States
30 May 08
Well said. I completely agree with you and get so annoyed when people say "you pick/choose to be gay".