With bared breast I say,

Secret keeping comes very easily to me. That's why it's a secret, people don't want you blabbing it all over the place LOL I am a very private person as well. Most of my friends know very little about me, they know only what I choose to tell them. My life is my life :)

I'm thinking this is in response to rj's discussion about the tags on pm's and what else can happen when people's privacy is violated? Otherwise someone's been reading your diary and I promise it wasn't me! LOL I'm pretty much an open book. Sure I have secrets and things I keep totally to myself. You have to have known me for a long time before you know me well enough to be trusted with my innermost thoughts. I think only Annie has that privilege. But she has literally pulled me back from hell, so there's really nothing she doesn't have a right to know. I know how to keep a confidence and I know how to be discreet, but I'm not comfortable being on the receiving end of someone's 'secrets'. Now I'm being totally and brutally honest here. This is because I'm so open about my own life. Not all the things that go on in my head and heart are available for public consumption, but there is nothing about the 'facts' of my life that I won't share if it will help someone else, or they are just curious. I try to live with respect for myself and others and I respect a person's 'need to know' in order to foster understanding. So sometimes I slip. I may reveal something about someone I know - not with malice, but because I've been honestly asked and I give an honest answer. Later I sometimes think"Sh*t, should I have said that?". But I never ever reveal a confidence that has been stated as a confidence. When asked I will say "Let me check with so and so and get back to you on that". Everyone has and needs a sense of privacy - it's what keeps our sense of ourselves intact as individuals. We need to know that we are 'safe' being who we are - the good, the bad, and the ugly of ourselves. We need to feel that we can trust but when that trust is broken, it not only affects relationships - no matter what kind they are, but it affects our sense of self and that is too precious a thing to mess with. I would never invade another's physical privacy - look under your mattress or read your diary or the like. But sometimes my mouth can run away from me when I'm in a convo with a trusted friend and that's a failing I work on all the time. Must be the Catholic guilt that makes me think I'm more guilty of it then I really am though right? LOL Because when I really think about it - I'm pretty good at keeping secrets that I know are important to someone and if their friendship is important to me, I know I can be counted on. Hells bells this is a lot of words to say a simple thing. Do you understand what I'm saying nova, or have I run off at the mouth again and just confused you?*sigh*

Secret is secret no matter what. My privacy is sacred. I keep all secrets and I demand others to do the same. I wouldn't forgive anyone to search my personal items. Diary is very personal and no one should attempt to open it. My personal bag and my cell phone are my properties and I consider it very private. My desk, my documents and my closet belongs to me. Everyone needs some privacy in life and some personal space. I also demand my personal space and my safety zone that no one should cross.

Nova, Remind me to NEVER get on your bad side! Actually, I'm pretty much the same way...I hate when someone makes assumptions (like my conversation last night!) about me and they only know half the story! I tend to keep my private life private...if I chose to share something with you, I fully expect it to be private and confidential! But if I'm talking to you about an issue I'm wrestling with (to get another opinion), I will change names or minor facts to protect the innocent. I will keep your confidence, and I expect the same (similar issue going on with my real estate agent...I know both of her sons and daughters-in-law who now know ALL of my financial problems--just NOT what I needed to have going on right now!)

I am totally with you on this one Nova, a secret is a secret and I also never lie, just miss bits out. An example of the missing bit would be when my mum used to ask who was at the youth club I would quite happily tell her every name but miss the name Michael out as she didn't like me with him, howver if she asked a direct question 'was Michael there' I would say yes. Even if I am no longer friends with someone if they told me something in confidence whilst I was friendly with them I won't tell ever even if they reveal some of mine. As far as myLot goes people are free to be as open or as secret as they want really. Some people are very open about their personal lives whereas others keep discussion topics on current affair subjects. I believe that most people on here are honest except the ages in some of the profiles but they have placed them as a silly age to show that age doesn't matter. I'm 45 and mine says 45. Good discussion topic by the way. Ellie :D

privacy is a big deal to me.. always has been. i dont like the gossipy he said she said bullsh|t, and im rarely catty.. and when i am? its because the gossip being relayed has to do with me specifically. this type of drama fest has recently touched down into our lives yet again. im really not very pleased about it. yes, i can keep a secret.. but i wont lie for anyone either. so if the secrets told to me, are things being kept from others.. and theyre being lied to, and they come to me directly and ask a question.. i will tell the truth in regards to it. so it is best to not include me into some scheme of deceptions.. while i wont broadcast it.. i wont hold it either if its going to make me a liar in the process.

i am so not good at keeping secrets. I just have a big mouth. I have to tell someone! That's just my nature I guess. I could probably keep a secret for a little while but I will eventually have to let it out.

Nova Darlin, I totally concur with you here. There are parts of me that I keep locked up tight in a treasure box bound down with links of chains forged from hurts and living. These things I never share not with anyone. They are mine and mine alone. I dealt with them at one time then put them away. I would never snoop into someones personal space like a diary. With one exception I would and have my boys. There are times a parent needs to know the secrets a child is hiding, I have gone through their desks, computer, their dresser drawers, back packs anything I needed to do to find out what I needed to. This stopped after they were adults. I would never ever do that to them now. Nor would I tread upon a friends privacy. Yes Nova Darlin I am faithful and just to secret keeping. I will die with the secrets buried in my heart.

Nova i have to say I agree with you and I know that i can keep anything other people tell me in confidence just that - confidential. It is not my place to tell anyone else their secrets and i would never do so unless they were in danger and needed real help. As for my own secrets well then I cannot for the life of me keep them secret! lol Weird how I have such different standards between my secrets and those of other people isn't it? Hugs xxx

I agree with you, when someone tells me something that they don't want told I respect their privacy. That is something that I hold dear also. Have a great day!

Yep I can keep a secret and I really do treasure my privacy if I tell you something and I find out that it is spread over god's green earth then I'm less likely to tell you something else and more likely to get even more secretive and guarded. I think if someone wants something kept secret and just between the two of you it has no business showing up here. Also if you open pandoras box and spill secrets on the lot be prepared to face the rath of the person who you have just hurt and lost their trust. Sorry Nova that it has taken this long to get to you. I promise I'll try and keep up with your posts. LOL!! I have to go night night now or else I'm going to be crap when I wake up with my daughter tomorrow. LOL!!!

...ssshhhh! can't answer your question.....the answer is a secret.

I'm the exact same way, go figure. It's a good way to be too. The analogy with the diary and asking an important question is brilliant. Most people wouldn't be prepared for what they would find. But that should teach them not to go into people's personal things. My mom read my journal when I was a teenager. Saw all my poetry and deepest thoughts, then went around and bragged what a good writer I was. Ughhh...none of it was meant for her. Until recently, years later, I never wrote a single thing in any journal. But now, I do. I wasn't letting her take that away from me. I would never look in anyone's journal, not ever. I wouldn't want to know what some people thought of me anyway if I made it in. LOL The way other's perceive you can be hard to take at times. Hopefully they love me but you never do know. Like you, I'm unshakeable on this issue as well. I felt violated when it happened to me and I wouldn't want to put anyone through that.

I can't tell you because it is a secret. But I do feel that if I am trusted, or trust, then I/they have no right to spill unless invited.

I am like you. Most of my life is an open book. I will tell people that I trust anything they want to know about me. I have very few secrets. I feel like, if I let you into my inner circle, if you have become close enough to me for me to feel comfortable telling you certain aspects of my life, then you must accept the whole of me. If I tell you a particular aspect of my life, and you look at me as though I am crazy; if it changes your view of me, I'm not embarrassed. I feel like if that is the way you react, I have made a mistake in telling you that information, and as such have learned a very valuable lesson about you, and will no longer consider you as part of my inner circle. I don't have many secrets of my own, but if I am told a secret I will keep it as such. There was something that my sister told me that she did last year, and at the time she told me not to tell anyone. Two months ago she brought it up in the car riding with our mom. She asked if I had told her already, and of course I said no. If someone tells me something to keep in confidence, unless I feel its something that will bring harm to someone, I will keep that secret. If I do tell someone something I wish to be kept under their hat, rarely that I do, I expect it to be done as such.

I am usually an open book, but I also do not share every last crumb of my being. If someone shares a secret with me, their secret is safe forever, and if I do share a secret mine has to be safe forever too. I do treasure my privacy and hold it close. I do not ever go through someone else's diary. that is like breaking and entering to me, robbing someone else of their privacy. My son is always saying if you do not want everyone to know your secrets do not post them on the internet, how very true.

Hi Novataylor, I ask people not to tell me their secrets, due to my add, there are times that I have a hard time discerning what part of what someone told me was a secret and what part isnt. So its easier for me to just not know. As for my life, there are very few people in this world that I feel comfortable sharing my inner most secrets and I trust them completely. Hugs, Tianna

I think life is too short to be telling stories and not respecting others privacy. A true friend would not do that. I do treasure my privacy. If you open someones diary you better have a good reason for doing so and you had better be ready for what potentially could be in it. I live by the golden rule. Do unto others as your would have them do unto you.