Do You Ever Feel Caught In The Middle Or Torn...
By MrsFairWells
@MrsFairWells (921)
Turkey
June 26, 2008 1:06pm CST
My sisters and I have always been close and I love them both to death. They are a second and thrid part of me, that's the way I feel about it anyway...
However, I noticed now as we have gotten older and we're all married, our relationships have all changed. Where we used to be able to speak freely with one another, now it seems like I have to watch everything I say because I'm afraid I will offend them and there will be yet another fight on our hands.
I love them both and I love their husbands and YES, I'm not going to lie, there are things that get on my nerves about each every one of them and I KNOW it's vice versa and sometimes I even vent it to one or the other sister but I love them non the less and I love hanging with them and being in their lives....
It just feels like lately that we can't just chill out and all get along without someone having a problem with one or the other. Why can't things just be simple and why can't we all just love one another for who we are and have our vices and get over it. It's me too as well, not only them...I just wish that things could be like when we were kids where we may have fought but we remained close and we never thought about it much after the fight was over and done with.
So, I guess my question is, why do things have to change when we get a family or our own and why does it have to be a competition, even when we don't mean for it to be? Is it just human nature and should we vent and get over it quickly? What's your opinion on this one and do you have similar relationships and issues in your family? How do you deal with it?
1 person likes this
2 responses
@mommyboo (13174)
• United States
29 Jul 08
I'm not sure. I think that some people grow apart after they grow up and start families, especially if you move away. When you're kids and together all the time in the same house with your parents, it's kind of hard to get away from each other. You almost become friends by default, and enemies whenever one of you irritates the other or takes something that belongs to the other, etc.
I love my sisters, my baby sister is getting married soon and we are flying up for her wedding. I don't stay in very good touch but she works full time and she and her fiance have been planning the wedding and also remodeling their house - by themselves. My other sister... she and I are very different. I feel like I have lots in common with my youngest sister even though we are 12 years apart, but the one who is only 2 years younger than me that I spent a lot of time with, we just see the world differently. I'm looking forward to seeing her and my BIL and my two nieces but I know that if we were not sisters, we would not have purposely become friends. I know that sounds odd and I've thought about that over years, and I have always felt that just because you're related to someone does not mean you have anything in common, that you will agree about anything, or that you have the same ideas and priorities in life.
1 person likes this
@MrsFairWells (921)
• Turkey
29 Jul 08
I love how you put that "when you're kids and together all the time in the house together and become friends by default, and enemies whenever one of us irritates the other or takes something that doesn't belong to the other."
That makes so much sense and I actually, surprising have never thought of it that way but it's so true sadly. That would explain why once we get out on our own, we all kinda go our own seperate ways and are not as close anymore.
As of right now my sisters and I are not speaking to one another and sadly, I miss them but my life is peaceful and I don't miss them as much as I thought I would. There's just been so much that has gone on between us all in the past that our relationships have really been extremely damaged by it and throw some husbands into the mix and it's just one big mess of disorder. Hopefully in time things will work itself out though...
Thanks so much for your comment, I really appreciate it more than you know....
@pioneer2009angel (135)
• United States
28 Jul 08
Yes, it does happen between sisters, we just seem to not want to get along even if we are sisters whether of blood or beliefs. But anyhow we need to make sure that life is better by simply hanging out, like having all the men in family ship in to help with kids and making dinner for the group. If you wanted to do something maybe a trip to a spa or spending a nite with them at a fancey hotel would be somethng you can set aside like riding a limo to a hotel and just enjoy spa service and get a big room ect. It may be expensive, the best way to communicate is just tell them what and how you feel, keep in control of your words. It difficult, even though you guys are all married and have husbands it maybe be best to arrange time for one another like meeting up at the store or park where the kids like to run like crazy.
1 person likes this
@MrsFairWells (921)
• Turkey
29 Jul 08
That would be awesome, accept I don't think our husbands would want us away for them even for the night. They say they can't sleep without us besides them :-P
However, it would be nice to perhaps eventually spend a day together, just us sisters and do something fun...
