Evolution of a Soccer Coach

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Year 1 My kids have asked to play soccer, and I am in line with a bunch of other parents waiting to sign their kids up. As I approach the table, one of the women in charge, Diana Wagner grabs me and says (what I know now is her infamous line) “We Need You!” Ok I have not volunteered for ANYTHING since my first child was born (and I know my offers to finish the last piece of cake don’t count). Besides, I don’t even know this woman. So of course I get ready to politely decline, but there was something in her smile, something in her eyes that let me know that if I didn’t do this, I would be missing out on one of the greatest experiences in my life. So, instead of no, I said, “What can I do?” “You can coach!” She told me emphatically. Excuse me? OK, I played soccer when I was a kid; sure, sure I could coach. Tell that to my first team! I arrived at the soccer team fully armed (just about the only thing I did do right). I had grown up in a single parent home and I remembered my mom rushing home from work to get me to soccer practice only to realize that I’d forgotten my shin guards and water bottle. Determined that no player on my team would have to miss out on practice I purchased 3 additional sets of shin guards and a case of water. I was ready! Or, so I thought. As I watched my team play a rousing game of kickball (at least they were kicking the ball, right?), I realized that even though I played soccer for a few ideas I had no idea how to coach. I hopped on the internet and learned EVERYTHING there was to know about soccer, even learned that I might want to plan the practice beforehand, details, details. Year 2 Back at the sign-up tables. This year my name is already on the coach list (hey I’m a pro now). Diana Wagner again grabs me, “We need you!” I’m on the coach list, what more does this woman want from me, my blood? But, the smile was flashed again. The words “What can I do?” Fall out of my mouth without my permission. “You can referee and help out at uniform night.” I sit on a bench with a small group of volunteers who have given up their time to learn how to officiate a soccer game. Unfortunately, there were not enough referee manuals to go around. They had underestimated Diana’s smile. I was one of the few who did not receive one, because I had coached before so of course I knew the rules, of course I did. Back to the internet. On uniform night I find myself in a sea of blue and yellow as Diana and I alone pull out uniform after uniform. Looking around I wonder where all the other volunteers are. “Do you do this all yourself?” I ask. “No, you’re helping me!” She smiled. She was right, and I smiled too. My first game as a referee and one of the coaches comes up to me and says, “You have no idea what you’re doing, do you?” Caught! My cover as soccer expert has been blown. But, I am a big believer in learning from doing so I went out there and fumbled away. Believe me BOTH coaches were sure to point out what I did wrong. But, rather than taking their criticisms to heart, I listened to what they said and learned. Okay, there are corner or goal kicks when the ball goes out of bounds near the net, got it. I never made that mistake again. (And if you believe that I do have this piece of property with a quaint little bridge... oh yeah, we’re talking soccer). Year 3 I am behind the registration table. Diana’s reach stretched through the telephone before soccer season even began. “We need you!” I swear I could see that damn smile. I am 6 weeks pregnant with my 6th child, so of course I decide I am going to take it easy this year – no refereeing. I will however, help with registration, help with uniforms, coach two teams, paint the fields, and be the coordinator for the U5 league. Being the soccer diva that I now am, I make a demand. I want an assistant coach for my U11 team. Someone has to run on the field with them during practice. I forgot to remind myself of my inner diva demands as I ran alongside the kids (5 months pregnant) on the one and only practice my assistant missed. Oh yeah and I forgot about the no refereeing thing. Details I tell you. Year 4 Diana Wagner was diagnosed with cancer the prior year. Because of her failing health, she again flashed that smile and said, (albeit a little quieter) “We need you!” I promised soccer would go on without her. Diana lost her battle with cancer on March 10, 2006. When Diana said “We need you!” I thought she wanted me to help HER. I know now, that she wanted me to help THEM – the children in AYSO. I am now an official Soccer Mom!