How do I get my husband to help out more around the house?

@CRSunrise (2981)
United States
December 2, 2008 7:19pm CST
What can I do to get my husband to help out more around the house? He's not chavonistic(sp?) or anything like that. He's just lazy. I've asked him at times, and he does help. However, if I don't ask, he doesn't help out that often. We've been married more than 6 years, and together for like 8 1/2 years. You would think he would have picked up on a few things. Any ideas or hints that'll help? Maybe I need to give him a swift kick in the butt. :-)
1 person likes this
5 responses
@kykidd (6812)
• United States
3 Dec 08
We all would like our husbands or boyfriends to be more helpful without us having to complain. And to me that seems to work, but then it causes friction between the both of you. Or at least I don't think it makes us females feel good if we have to complain just to get the man to do something. Perhaps just making comments or compliments more often when he does something. It seems like my fellow tends to be more helpful when I thank him for the little things he does. Then again if he doesn't do anything, it is hard to get the opportunity to compliment him. I think this is the most positive way to get help though. Good luck to you and have a good evening!
@CRSunrise (2981)
• United States
3 Dec 08
Oh, I've made comments. It doesn't exactly cause friction, but when I try to talk to him about him helping out more, he sighs, and says something like, "I know, I should help out more." BUt it doesn't exactly help out any.
@808nala (640)
• United States
4 Dec 08
I feel very fortunate. My husband does almost everything around the house. We sometimes have to race to over to the sink to see who will get to wash the dishes or run to the dryer to see who will fold the laundry. I'm pretty sure that he's so good and helpful because of his upbringing. He saw his father do all the cooking and some of the cleaning when he was a kid so it's normal practice in his family for the man to do at least half the stuff around the house. Anyway, to answer your question, I think you have to be very direct with men in general. They don't think like women. They don't respond to hints like women do. Especially if it's something that is not enjoyable for them. They will pretend that they didn't see or hear you hinting.... but, if you ask for help and give specific tasks for him to do, he will most likely do it for you..... at least in my experience. Good luck!!
@shymurl (2765)
• United States
3 Dec 08
thats the million dollar question LOL. I husband and I have been married for almost eleven years. Sometimes (not very much) he will help but for the most part I have given up on asking him to help me. He will usually ask me when i'm almost done if I need any help, and he gets mad when I say no. oh well. good luck to you.
@relundad (2310)
• United States
3 Dec 08
Husbands and male partners are just oversized kids....if you don't assign the chore it doesn't get done, period. So you sit him down and have a nice little chat. You say that all of the housework or chores is becoming a bit much and you were wondering if you guys could split the load. You ask if there is any of this heavy load that he would be willing to take off your hands. Asking for help, means that you NEED him. What man wont take you up on that offer?
• Malaysia
3 Dec 08
im always do like this..if he wanna do something, i will try to help him all my best..so i keep talk if i gone, who want to help you to solve your problem..so it will remind him to help me if i need help..but you must know it cant happen suddenly..it just like to keep him remember what we done for him..