forgetfulness

@riyasam (16556)
India
January 8, 2009 9:02am CST
i dont know what has come over me lately,but on jan 3rd,i went to bed thinking tomorrow is my hubbys birthday.but on the next day,i completely forgot.i was so embarrassed ,when my father-in-law reminded me.i could see the hurt in my husbands eyes .how can i make up for my forgetfulness and what could be the cause??(plz its no medical condition)
3 people like this
18 responses
• United States
9 Jan 09
I think it is being to busy in your normal life. The way I deal with it is writing myself notes. I think it is not aging it is life is to busy. I think he will forget sometime and pay you back.
1 person likes this
@riyasam (16556)
• India
10 Jan 09
ya,life has become very busy nowadays,noone has time for anyone else.i donot want to be sucked in this rot.my hubby had forgotten my birthday once earliar and i had created a scene.now the tables have been torned on me.
1 person likes this
• United States
10 Jan 09
Well you have loads of making up to do.
@bombshell (11256)
• Germany
8 Jan 09
do you know what? i was like you before,i forget our anniversary and hubby cried infront of me because i forgot our wedding day .but this year set on the phone with the special ocassion and i doubled the anniversary gift to my hubby.
1 person likes this
@riyasam (16556)
• India
8 Jan 09
i am too going to set a reminder on my mobile(i thought i can remember,i didnt want to disturb kids sleep by its ringing.)
@bombshell (11256)
• Germany
31 Mar 09
thanks for the BR riyah
• Philippines
10 Jan 09
I understand your situation. It happened to me once when I forgot about my sister's birthday. Like you, I also remembered her birthday the night before her birthday but on the actual date of her birthday, I forgot. To compensate my forgetfulness, I just treated her and her husband for dinner.
1 person likes this
@riyasam (16556)
• India
10 Jan 09
thanks for your response.he loves non-veg,so then going out for dinner would be a nice idea!!!
@dawnald (85129)
• Shingle Springs, California
10 Jan 09
I do that all the time. I remember something in advance but then when the time comes I get distracted or whatever and forget it. At the point in time that you think of it, it is a good idea to put a reminder somewhere (alarm on phone, online calendar, something) so you don't forget later. You'll find some way to make it up to him, I'm sure!
1 person likes this
@riyasam (16556)
• India
10 Jan 09
yup,i had to go to church the next day being sunday and in that hurry-burry,it somehow slipped from my mind.
@ANTIQUELADY (36440)
• United States
9 Jan 09
u are just like everybody else u have too much on your mind. i know u hate u did this. i bet u can find a way to make it up to him. lol
1 person likes this
@riyasam (16556)
• India
10 Jan 09
thanks for your comment.he has a condition,he wants to go on a holiday.(children barred)
@CJay77 (4438)
• Australia
31 Mar 09
I think we have the same problem of being forgetful sometimes! But thankfully I haven't forgotten my Husband birthday, but I have with my sister before and I'm sure I upset her. Now I have set their b-days in my mobile phone with alarm, so it will remind me when it's time. I'm not sure what could it be the cause, but maybe you can do the same like I do and like your first respond says!
1 person likes this
@riyasam (16556)
• India
1 Apr 09
ya,sisters get more upset(i know by experience).maybe its because we cannot be always with them and they are very much attached to us(its a different relation,one which has no name,but its wonderful)
@winterose (39887)
• Canada
9 Jan 09
there is no answer that that does not involve an aspect of medical, I dont know what the cause is, I don't know you or your life it could be stress, it could be absentmindness, it could be you were thinking of something else that was more pressing on your mind but every thing to do with the mind is medical, so other than that I do not know what to say.
1 person likes this
@riyasam (16556)
• India
10 Jan 09
there was lot on my mind these days.my kid has to get admission,theres interview for that and my sis-in 0law gave birth recently,i have to take care,my kids (aged 6 and 2 resp)donot annoy the mother and child.besides that,we had so many guests,i had to see to their minute details and to top it all,i had to please my in-laws.maybe thats the reason for my stress.
@checapricorn (16061)
• United States
9 Jan 09
[i]Hi riyasam, Ohh....I Guess next time, you need to have some reminders like in my case, I don't like to miss to greet my Parents, hubby, sister in their birthday, what I did, I will write some notes and place it in my table, a very visible place because I know I am always in my table for the day so in that case, that will be the first thing I will do during their special day! In your case, I know your hubby will understand! Just cook him his favorite food and give him anything he will love! [/i]
1 person likes this
@riyasam (16556)
• India
10 Jan 09
oh,he does understand but he feels guilty ,thinking he is over-burdening me.
9 Jan 09
My heart goes out to you. I have been getting more and more forgetful and absent minded as time goes past. Again it is nothing medical... just one of those things. I do stupid things! The most recent being putting the rubbish in the washing basket and the dirty laundry in the bin!! If i lose something we check the most unusual places first now! I have no idea why i would put my purse in the freezer but i do! It has become a family joke now that I am so absent minded and forgetful that no one gets offended or upset! Names are a real pain as I am constantly having to be reminded of peoples names! But such is life. I'm sure your hubby will forgive you.
1 person likes this
@riyasam (16556)
• India
9 Jan 09
my most commonest faux -pas is ,i keep the keys in a safe place and i forget ,which safe place it was.
@snowy22315 (168420)
• United States
9 Jan 09
I also am very forgetful. I always have been. I will walk into a room and forget why I'm there. I also will leave things in hotel rooms and stuff like that alot. If I go somewhere to visit and stay overngiht I am always leaving things behind. It is never an easy to task for me to get ready and go somewhere.
1 person likes this
@riyasam (16556)
• India
10 Jan 09
sometimes i open the fridge and stand there wondering,why the hell did i open the fridge??
@salonga (27775)
• Philippines
9 Jan 09
Oh that is really forgetfulness but I believe it is not a serious condition. If I may say so it could be the same case as I always experience. I tend to forget a lot of important things because I have so many things to attend to. To remedy the situation, I am now maintaining a notepad that contains all the things to do and to remember for the day. Each morning before I start to work I look over that notepad then start working on them as prioritized. I also do not put off. I do immediately and then check as I finished working one after the other. Very important things to remember are birthdays of course of our loved ones. I also put a reminder in my mirror because each day as I wake up I always comb my hair first at the mirror so I see also the reminder.
1 person likes this
@riyasam (16556)
• India
10 Jan 09
that is a very good idea to put the reminder on the mirror.most of the time,i remeber certain tasks after going,then i feel quite lazy to get up.i will put reminders on my mobile ,as it is always by my side(i use it for alarm purposes also).
@silverjam (969)
• United States
8 Jan 09
Well I guess people always tend to forget something in one way or another. I myself is a very forgetful person; I always forget about anything, usually small things and am not very good in remembering things. I have this since childhood and I guess I got it from my mom who was very gorgetful herself. I don't really know what's the cause of this but honestly this quite bothers me because it had affected me in many ways.
1 person likes this
@riyasam (16556)
• India
9 Jan 09
it seems moms always have a history of forgetfulness.my mom puts the specs atop her head and searches for it,everywhere else.
@iskayz (5420)
• Philippines
9 Jan 09
Hi there! Maybe you forgot about the date due to the recent busy days because of the holiday season. I myself sometimes lose track what day it is during Christmas season cause of the continues days of no work and holiday. It was an honest mistake so I think there is nothing to worry about. Just tell him the truth that you forgot about it. That the special day just lipped your mind. I'm sure he'll understand. Ciao!
@riyasam (16556)
• India
9 Jan 09
yup tthere was a lot of things on my mind and he does understand,but he became hurt,as i forgot at his birthday at my in-laws place.(it implied that ,they were giving me some sort of tension.)
• India
9 Jan 09
Hi riyasam, these things also happen to me sometimes. I too cannot understand what is causing such forgetfulness. I noticed that it happens more when I remain preoccupied with some other thought without noticing it. To make up it is better to let him know the reason and say sorry than to put forth arguments in favour of not doing it. He may not understand immediately but will do it after some time. One way is to use reminding devices as many have suggested. I do one more thing. If I have to something very important on the next day, in the bed,I just concentrate (kind of prayer) and request the pillow of mine to remind me the important thing and it helps. You may try. Good luck
1 person likes this
@riyasam (16556)
• India
10 Jan 09
that is a very good idea.i do believe in the power of prayer. i donot know why i didnt think about it till now.
@amitksing (1323)
• India
8 Jan 09
Its very natural that we forget things, I dont think there may be any specific cause. May be you were too busy with everyday work and so forgot it. Well, to make ur hubby happy, U can try this. Send some lovely gift to him through mail and say it got delayed.. Although a lie, but I think a lie that doesnt harm anyone but only makes happy is worth doing.
@riyasam (16556)
• India
8 Jan 09
i will try .thanks for your advice.
@comfort55 (1574)
• India
8 Jan 09
It depends how much your husband understnds you. If I would have made such a mistake( though I don't remember making ever till date), my hubby would take it lightly as he can understand that one tends to forget in a busy schedule. So don't feel guilty, this doen't reflect that you don't care for your husband..just relax.
@riyasam (16556)
• India
9 Jan 09
it happened first time ,during the ten years of our marraige,hope i donot repeat this forgetfulness again.
@jordan04n (463)
• United States
8 Jan 09
Make a date with him, take him to dinner, movie, sweet gift. run hid shower and hop in. make a candle light dinner at home...do all or some of these or be creative. Sometimes words are not enough...write him a love letter from, the Book of Soloman...that always works.
1 person likes this
@riyasam (16556)
• India
9 Jan 09
he he.thanks for the input.
@bamrahkirti (1821)
• India
9 Jan 09
Dear it is not a blunder which you have done,you might have forgotten it because of some busy schedule or being owerpowered by other things .Just apologise for your forgetfulness and arrange a special dinner for him.Make dishes which he likes the most and present him the thing which he wanted to have. His anger will vanish in a second.
@riyasam (16556)
• India
10 Jan 09
he is not at all angry,just hurt,as he feels i didnot give him the deserved attention!!thanks for your input.