how would you help a friend

@mamalev (264)
Philippines
February 21, 2009 7:10pm CST
my friends and I have been friends for more than 2 decades now, we've been friends since high school. in short we've been through good and bad times. but this time one of us have a very serious problem with the father of her kids because his ex-wife is causing trouble. now, we're about to meet up and we don't know how to help this friend of ours. the thing is she doesn't ask for help so we don't know if we should touch the topic of her problem. we resolved that we'd never open that topic and let her speak first. i have long wanted to tell her that the guy is a super jerk but i think she already knows that and wouln'd want me to rub it in.
2 responses
• Canada
23 Feb 09
as tough as it might be to not say something you would be better if you waited for her to come to you. just be there for her. and support her the best way you can.
@mamalev (264)
• Philippines
24 Feb 09
thanks! my other friends and i agreed to let her open up. yes, we'll definitely give her moral support and i know that's what she expects us to do.
@forslahiri (1042)
• India
22 Feb 09
Hi, On the contrary,she may also feel the same-being a 'friend' why U r not asking for help/advise/suggestion, when she also could sense U know it all?Ask her straight, if she is a 'friend', she will respond-Yes/No.Proceed accordingly.Transparency has no substitute, in friendship. =Lahiri,Kolkata,India.
@mamalev (264)
• Philippines
22 Feb 09
thanks, i've the same thoughts but had to agree with my other friends about not opening the subject because i was outnumbered. i have always been transparent with my friends and they know that.