Being attractive and nice, may be dangerous to your health!
May 8, 2009 6:51am CST
When my daughter complained to me about some unwanted attentions from a guy at school, I advised her to be kind but firm that she didn't want him coming on to her. It wouldn't be proper or kind to give him the impression she was interested. She was really afraid, though, because she didn't know how to make this guy understand that it wasn't personal, it was simply because she wasn't ready to date anyone. She was scared that if she didn't play along this guy might pull a "columbine". SHe felt he was the "type" She spent the semester on tenderhooks. What would you say or do in a situation like this? Guys, how does a girl say "no" in such a way as to NOT make you feel bad?
3 people like this
8 May 09
Ask her to tell him that she has more ambitions in life and don't want to date anybody until she has achieved something.She should be firm and steady not only in her words but also in the body language.The boy should understand that it will be a mere waste of time to convince her for a date.Cheers!
• South Africa
8 May 09
I can hear your concern because of all these incidenses that happened at schools you don't want to offend the wrong person. It might just be a trigger for disaster. A decent guy would approach in a decent way and understand if being told that she does not want to be in a relationship. Unfortuanitaly not all people are decent. She must make sure that she is never alone so that guys would be hisitant to appraoch when she is with a crowd of friends, guys and girl friends. Hope the situation is resoved soon. Blessings
8 May 09
Actually, this situation is now resolved. She ended up asking the teacher to move her seating, and this helped alleviate the situation. She avoids contact with him other than a polite "HI" when he says hello. I wondered though, how many other young girls are going through something similar? How many are afraid to say no because they are terrified of the possible ramifications?