My Silly Thoughts

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Weeks before my surgery, I was really afraid. I overcome my fear, though as friends advises and prayers gave me the strength. I prayed a lot but still as the day comes nearer silly thoughts hunted me. I thought of talking to my children friends and leave their fate to them. Am teary eyed watching everything at home, including the pc, oh I sighed, "my online friends, my blogs, and everything". I was thinking of the coming christmas and I felt sad I may not be able to see, the happiest occasion am always excited about. When the day came, I hugged my eldest daughter who would be left at home as she could not come with me at the hospital as she just gave birth to my first grandson, I kissed my two grandchildren crying as if I could no longer come home again. My children were also crying but they told me "God is good", everything will be alright. We pass by the Baclaran Church, prayed the novena to Our Mother of Perpetual Help, My daughter's co teacher kissed me and said they're praying for me, I cried again. When I was brought to the operating room, I no longer cried, I just prayed hard and recited the Psalm-91, while there, I was expecting a shadow or faces of my dead loved ones, my mom and dad, my husband and my sister as they said if you'll going to die they will visit you, but instead I whispered, "no don't wish for me to be with you yet", my children and grandchildren still need me. I continued praying, reciting two words "Allelujah Jesus" repeatedly until surgery done. When I was returned to my bed, my children and brothers were in all smiles, I smiled too and whisper, "those silly thoughts". God is really Good. I laugh every time I remember those silly thoughts. Do you have similar experience? Please share.