Sometimes things get solved for you...

@Loverbear (4918)
United States
November 21, 2009 2:09am CST
Many of my fellow MyLotters have read my discussions about a dear friend of mine and her marital problems. Her husband has been abusive verbally and emotionally plus he had an affair during their marriage. One day he looked at my friend and told her that he married her because "HE FELT SORRY FOR HER". If it had been me I would have kicked his fanny out right then and there. But she stayed with him and suffered the pain of the abuse, affair and even took care of him after he had valve replacement surgery in his heart. Well, today she was informed that he needs to appear before Social Security in the first part of December, bringing along his green card (which expired quite awhile ago) and other documents including the marriage license. Other things have been happening which lead me to believe that my friends husband is facing deportation rather soon. It will be a blessing as she is planning to divorce him shortly and she is afraid that he will be pestering her constantly and knocking at her door at all times of the day and night. I am very relieved as she will be safe if he is deported, and she won't feel the need to keep an eye on him and take care of him (she is too caring for her own good!). We have spent many hours discussing the problems that her filing for divorce will cause, and this is one of those times that I realized that the problem is being taken care of for us... Have you experienced this form of relief?
1 response
Apple3Cranberry
@Apple3Cranberry (678)
• United States
21 Nov 09
WELL! I think your Dear friend has some troubles. Not only is she going through a rough time, but she is losing someone she had thought she had loved for a very long time. It sounds like they "went through" a lot together. Why did she stay with him? And why was he so mean to her? There must be something going on here! Perhaps HE is going through some rough times. And she is kind enough, (if she believes in marriage vows) to love him through sickness and in health, etc. Sometimes you can't take things at face value. But I guess he is moving out anyways, and that they are getting a divorce anyways. Sometimes love ends up like this. I feel bad for him that he had trouble with his heart. It sounds like they did have a rough time! I feel sorry for him. Mainly because it sounded like he needed/needs help. As with the affair as well. Help as in...do I really want to stay in this relationship?...I have bad health, do I want to stay in love with her?... It sounds like you are very concerned! Perhaps you are quite interested in relationship dynamics. Are you glad that the "problem was taken care of, for you?" I don't really understand what a green card is...is he from a different country? Well your girlfriend will have to look forward to dating other guys in the future. This will help her look forward to something!