people who bring up the past
December 22, 2009 6:46pm CST
im very sensitive whenever the past is mentioned. when i say the past, i meant relationship which involves exes. ive finally agreed to meet my bf's friends. i was hesitant at first because i know things won't be easy. this is like getting to know you pattern. things were okay at first. we enjoyed exchanging stories and such. but they spoiled it by mentioning my bf's ex. it became tensed afterwards. im not sure if they did it on purpose. while my bf reprimanded them not to mention the past anymore because he no longer cared, they still teased him anyway which even made the meeting more awkward. i nearly exploded but controlled myself because i don't want them to say something bad about me... if you were in my shoes, what would you have done? i was being scolded by my friends too because i didn't say anything about it. what do they want me to do? start a ruckus in the restaurant? LOLz. they knew im hurting and that what they are doing is to protect me but its not helping matters at all. my bf just decided not to meet them again anymore because if they're rude enough to bring it up in front of me, they are bound to do it again the next time..sigh.. people can be insensitive and downright rude!
23 Dec 09
Hello eliezl. Sorry to burst your bubble, but I think you should learn to accept it. It's part of your bf's past, and you can't do anything about the past. If you're sensitive about it, you should learn to brave through it. As I've seen in you other discussion, I think you are getting married next year. So, you better learn it quick, as I think it'll be more difficult if you are married.
23 Dec 09
Well, you can try changing the subject by starting up a new conversation. When I feel disgusted by what others say I show it clearly, but they don't always cut it out. Good luck with your boyfriend's friends!
9 Feb 11
its happened already madteaparty, but my boyfriend now hubby doesnt allow me (him included) to interact with them anymore. he thinks its easier that way, saves us both the trouble. and yep i guess i have to learn from that incident should it happen again in the future (if ever) thanks so much for the reply :-)
23 Dec 09
You should have laugh so loud and told them, what matters most is the current and not the past. Past is past but sometimes we can not just drop them out absolutely because they are still a continuation of the current. Learn to explode sometimes if the need would arise, saying enough will be the best way to stop an issue that affects us secretly.
9 Feb 11
i wish i could have done that DenverLC..actually there are many things i wish i would have done that time..hehe but its happene dnow and as uve said, past is past..whats happen has happened already. all i could do is just look back, move on, learn from it. thanks for the comment by the way ^__^