Would you marry a man with hiv/aids

United States
January 16, 2010 12:19am CST
if you were not infected yourself? I have a family member who lived an openly gay life. he lived with his ex boyfriend for over 9 years. he got this from a previous relationship and was never tested. Now some of you may already know about this person from my post about finding this out. Anyway,my family member said he wants to do away with that life style. he has since met a very nice woman online from the Islands. She is now living with him in NY. He will be marrying her to keep her here. They will even try to have kids. My entire family has mixed feelings about this situation. I feel Sharon has every right to be happy with him. But,what kind of life would the child have if infected? I would like to know your thoughts.
2 people like this
12 responses
@maria1081 (1252)
• Philippines
16 Jan 10
I dont have the right to judge anyone how he/she live his/her life. But I guess one reason for having HIV positive is having different partners. If I were to choose I wont marry someone who has HIV. It would be also selfish to his part since he knew that he was the one who has HIV why risk others by infecting them. Why let little children suffer because of his/her parents. If you really care about children you wouldnt think of having them.
• United States
16 Jan 10
I can respect this as well. he loves kids and never ever talked about having any. Now she wants another child so he wants one. I would not do this to that sweet woman. Thanks
@joyadalia (1408)
• Philippines
16 Jan 10
Will true love save the day? Probably not. In the end, you might both die of the illness. So, for me, I won't do that no matter how much I love the person. You might just have a child out of this marriage - what happens to the child who will surely be AIDS positive, too? That will only bring yet another human being into the world to suffer.
1 person likes this
• United States
16 Jan 10
I could not have said it better. Thanks
@joyadalia (1408)
• Philippines
17 Jan 10
Thanks
@kaylachan (5054)
• Daytona Beach, Florida
16 Jan 10
I try not to be a very judgmental person. So to me it doesn't matter what the person has or doesn't have. It is true there is a possibility any children they have may contract the dease since hereity is one way to transmit it, but if the two believe they would be happy togeather, they should at least try. Though marrage is a binding thing, so they should see if the relationship can develop into something strong to withstand that.
1 person likes this
• United States
16 Jan 10
marriage is not sacred as it once was. I wish happiness on anyone. But ,this situation is sick. Thanks for your nice response.
• Philippines
16 Jan 10
If I truly love her, then yes. Love is sacrifice.
1 person likes this
• India
29 Oct 10
Hi contract with me -- debapriya1972@gmail.com
@adhyz82 (36255)
• Indonesia
1 Nov 10
what`s wrong with your email??
@Kalyni2011 (3497)
• India
9 Dec 10
hello you may call me selfish or outdated, but i am not going to marry a person who has aids or had aids, i will never take the risk, oh this discussion is 11 months old, did they marry, how are they now? god bless thanks for sharing. kalyni
@ally12 (1203)
• Philippines
9 Dec 10
I would surely not.I wont sacrifice my kids future for my selfish decision.But who I am to speak for others.?
@adhyz82 (36255)
• Indonesia
1 Nov 10
i think it`s hard to marry with a man like that
• India
29 Oct 10
I am HIV +42 man I am married& I have a daughter they are not HIV + now they are make distance with me, now I am filing alone I hopeif eny HIV + woman marry with me so I am living next life beter,my family parmition me,I am profetional body builder & fightness trainer,but I am now UN emply because my both side of leg is wick after HIV attack now I am 80% quore. My Email ID (debapriya1972@gmail.com)
• United States
17 Jan 10
That's a scary situation. I understand you want him to have some happiness in his life.... however he needs to be forward with this Woman even if it means loosing her. If they plan on a family they may look at donor for the mans end of things or adopting and not have full "relations" so she does not catch the disease. I would worry too about the quality of life for the baby, the medical expense, and the length of the childs life provided he/she is not born with it. As I imagine his treatments are not inexpensive to keep it under some control. I guess I would support him provided he was honest with her & hope for a happy life for them.
@Nameless_ (1180)
• Australia
17 Jan 10
This is hard. is the woman actually agreeable to be infected with HIV and AIDS? The child will most surely be infected. The child is sharing the same blood with the mother. I think the woman should get pregnant from a fertility center instead.
@JenInTN (27545)
• United States
16 Jan 10
That's a tough one. Everyone has the right to happiness and I would never dispute that but your right about a child. Children have no choice and it wouldn't be fair to bring one into the world knowing that it would be infected and have very limited time to live. If it were me, I wouldn't but that's me. If I were in love..that might be different but even if..I wouldn't want to have children with him.