How would you interpret "I have a gift card so we can get coffee" - ???

@much2say (44518)
United States
August 20, 2010 4:03pm CST
I have this friend who lacks clarity in the things she says. For another friend's birthday, she wanted to take her out to Starbucks. Birthday friend hates Starbucks - and she has told that to my friend a zillion times - but the friend insisted they meet at Starbucks - which is always the case for some reason. Now, birthday friend is hard up on money right now. Starbucks is a waste of money to her. Birthday friend had invited the friend for coffee at her place for cheap eats - but our friend still insisted on Starbucks. So the friend said, "Oh, well I have a gift card, so we can get coffee there". I would interpret that as she had a gift card to spend already so there was no "buying" involved, so coffee was on her - especially since it was her birthday. And so did the birthday friend. So birthday friend agreed, though she still didn't want to go to Starbucks. So she gets to Starbucks, and the friend already had a coffee and snack in hand (she does this all the time). The birthday friend didn't get anything . . . as she assumed that the friend was treating her - so she waited for her to say something. 45 minutes into this meeting, the friend gave her a gift card for Starbucks for her birthday and asks "Did you want to get some coffee?" - meaning she can now pay for Starbucks herself . . . and then had to get back to work shortly thereafter. WTH? First, I wouldn't give a friend a Starbucks gift card to a friend if I knew she hated Starbucks. Second, I wouldn't have expected the friend to use the gift card on the spot if I had just given it to her for her birthday . . . I would have treated her and have her save the gift card for another time. This is really sad - considering a couple years ago my friend said she would treat the birthday girl to dinner at a nice place . . . well, she took her out to dinner but didn't pay for the birthday girl's dinner - so birthday girl unexpectedtly had to pay for her own bill by credit card (in which she was in debt and the other friend knew about it). Like I said - WTH?
3 responses
@dawnald (84199)
• Shingle Springs, California
20 Aug 10
Going back to my discussion on etiquette... Why mention the gift card if she wasn't treating? I don't get that at all.
@much2say (44518)
• United States
22 Aug 10
Funny you say that . . . actually a lot that I mentioned on your etiquette discussion pertains to this friend. I think "she" is a pet peeve of mine period - ha ha! I think she needs a big lesson in manners . . . I swear this girl has the worst I've ever seen . . . otherwise, she can be a good friend, if you believe that.
1 person likes this
@dawnald (84199)
• Shingle Springs, California
23 Aug 10
Maybe she was raised by wolves. :D
@much2say (44518)
• United States
23 Aug 10
Ha! Doubtful - as wolves even have better manners than her - ha ha!
1 person likes this
• United States
21 Aug 10
Yes she puts it bluntly and well knowing that your friend hates starbucks well it should be a mutual agreement as to where to go. The fact that she says she has a gift card, what the hooey is that, what kind of gift was that. I mean she may has well just not given anything that being the case. Wow!
@much2say (44518)
• United States
22 Aug 10
Yah, pretty lame, eh? My friend ALWAYS has to pick Starbucks as a meeting point - it's convenient to her I guess. But yes, not everyone wants to go there! And yah, she might as well have not mentioned the gift card - stupid hooey is what it was!!
@OConnell87 (1045)
20 Aug 10
thats not a real friend is it really. And coffee is not a bday present, like you said dinner at a nice place is a better idea and one that people appreciate because they can dine and chat for hours whereas coffe is just a few mins. The only way to get back at this person is for your friend to get her a gift card for a pace she doesn't like
@much2say (44518)
• United States
22 Aug 10
Well, I think treating someone to coffee is convenient way to celebrate a birthday when everyone doesn't have the time, but still, it's not good that my friend picked "her" favorite hang out, knowing that the birthday friend did not like it there. And why did she give her a gift card for that place too? Yah, that would be funny if the birthday friend did the same to her!