Killing people with kindness

If only these kids came with a manual! I think some parents really have trouble balancing this. Specially if they grew up being pampered and spoiled too. If parents themselves have not learned to be responsible enough, then it goes with their children too. I am even guilty of it sometimes!

Thanks for the best response! I haven't had proper notifications in months!!! I am so sorry to be belated. I think a manual at the hospital would be a great idea for new parents..maybe I will write my daughter one now that she is going to be a mom too.

Hello Chevee. It's hard to be in a family where you can plainly see bad parenting. And yet you can't do anything about it. It's sad that some parents are not well equipped in rearing a child the right way. Thanks. Thank you too stary1.

'And I just put them all in the hands of the Lord.' Chevee... Great point and I am afraid too many forget to call on God for help when parenting. Perhaps even churches need to teach loving and tough love to parents to help them. I do think it's becoming harder to raise kids..but them every generation has that same complaint.

That's what I'm afraid too! It may all be good now, but I could certainly see the future of this kid. Even now, 7 months after I posted this discussion, I don't see much change from the boy and his mom. I'm afraid that the kid would have difficulty in his future, specially if his mom would be out of the picture already. Thanks!

The sad thing is, some parents fail to recognize this. In their 'love and selflessness' to their children, they fail to see that it is actually not helpful for their children later on. Just like this mom. I hope she realizes this. Or that the child grows up better than expected. Thanks HWG!

I think you've hit a good point there! Appreciation of what they have - I think kids who are raised this way fail to learn this valuable lesson. Which in turn lead them to unproductive lives, which sometimes can even be a burden to society. Thanks.

As parents, we can only hope that when this 'rude awakening' happens, the children recover. Or learn to adapt on how the real world works. Else, they'd be part of the many who've become a burden to scociety. Thanks stary1.

Me too! I was spanked and when I was grown , I respected my mom.

I was not spanked (though I'm not against it), but I was threatened often. My mom used the "count to 3" method, and she never had to get to 3 with me. I was raised with respect towards authority, and a fear of getting in trouble. I wasn't afraid of my parents or authority figure, I just didn't ever want to get in trouble. I never spoke back to an adult or did anything out of line. I knew my boundaries and I stuck to them. Kids these days do not have that kind of respect or fear. I don't know what changed.. but kids are not like they used to be.. and it scares me!

That's exactly what I'm afraid off! This boy would grow up like a big baby, and treat his mom the same way even when he's already a man. I grew up in a house with spanking, and I think I grew up alright. I think!

Hi Hatley. No disrespect to your age (sorry), but I think it must be frustrating for you to look at all the young parents out there. And all the mistakes they make with their children. I think there is nothing wrong with raising children with a little discipline. Sadly, some parents don't think so. Thanks.

Hi dawn. I think you could actually extract this response, and place it in another discussion of mine. And I wouldn't even know the difference!

Ugh, must be a guy thing. Lucky for you you don't have 5 kids.. otherwise I think your wife (you do have one, right? You don't talk about her much) would be as bonkers as I am! I think around here it gets worse when the kids are in school. I spend the day finding things that they should have done but didn't.. and of course they're in school so I can't yell at them until they're home, which means I stew on it all day long and am even angrier by the time they're home. Today has thus far been a terrible day for that. I woke up this morning and immediately started a load of laundry. Well there was a basket full of clothes waiting for me to fold them.. this didn't surprise me. Usually by the end of the day I'm so worn out that the idea of folding one more load is just too much for me so it sits until the next day.. I just make sure there isn't a wet load in the washer sitting till the next day. Anyways, I begin folding these clothes and realize a few things.. 1. I had folded my last load yesterday before leaving for work, and 2. these clothes were soaking wet still!! It seems that the oldest child decided he needed his uniform for soccer washed, so he did a load while I was at work. Well I had already had a load in the dryer, and it wasn't completely dry yet. This happens.. sometimes we need to run it twice to get the clothes completely dry, especially when it's a load of towels or jeans like this one was. But my son was in such a hurry he didn't bother running the dryer for another cycle.. he just took the wet clothes out and let them sit in the basket overnight!! Now I have to rewash that entire load.. and I am angry! I called and yelled at hubby for not paying attention.. because I sure can't yell at my son while he's in school. Grrr!

Geez! Sorry. I don't know what to say (write). I hope you've already knocked some sense into your son and hubby. Maybe a good punishment for them would be for them to do the laundry and fold them for the next few loads! I do most of the laundry at home, so leaving them wet is also not an uncommon thing. The good thing is, nobody seems to want to do a load by themselves. So, I need not worry about what you went through.

Oops! Guilty here! I think that sounds like me. Although there are days/nights when I could be on my kids all the time, there are definitely days when I could be lazy. And when they say it, it's good enough for me. Thanks Sargeant Katsmeow!

As a parent myself, I think this is why it's easy for me to see her mistake. I'm sure it's difficult for her to see it. Just having one child, and only one focus of her attention also doesn't help. Thanks teamrose.