Is your opinion wrong if it is not the same as someone else's?
@PointlessQuestions (15397)
United States
September 11, 2011 11:57am CST
Okay... here we go into this discussion about RIGHT and WRONG! Is my opinion wrong just because it is not your opinion? I'm not meaning like I think 2 + 2 = 16.. we all know that is wrong, okay? I simply mean if I have an opinion that differs from yours. Maybe my opinion is that I want to mind my own business and not get involved in other people's business. They might ask for an opinion, but I might not want to give my opinion because it might be of a sensitive nature, and knowing this, it might cause the person to get upset with me. Soooo... what if they get mad because I chose my own opinion to keep my mouth shut?
Or.. let's say Joe Blow asks me (in an email) if he should buy a brand new TV set that takes up half of the room in his double wide trailer. Joe reasons that he can catch up with the bills after he buys the big screen TV. The thing is that Joe already got the pink slips in the mail where they say they will cut off the services if the bill isn't paid this month on a certain date. Joe Blow hasn't paid his electric bill yet, hasn't bought food yet, and his kids are in bad need of clothes to wear, because the clothes they have are already not fitting well due to outgrowing them. The TV service has been cut off for months due to having to pay bills by "pick a number and stand in line"... so in my mind he has no common sense, and his value system probably is way out of line since he will let his family suffer by not even giving them what they need. The big screen is more important, and the TV service isn't even connected, so he will just watch DVDs on it, I guess.
Now, I could tell Joe Blow that he should pay his bills, feed his family and put some decent clothes on his kids, but anyone with one eye and half sense should know this without having to ask me. I could tell him what is exactly on my mind, but I could also choose to be gentle and just say what I would do.. or say nothing at all.
I chose to tell Joe Blow that I would take care of my needs before my wants, and just leave it at that, but Joe Blow wants to make a federal case out of it now because I insulted his way of thinking.
So I chose not to say anymore and mind my own business, and Joe Blow is still puffed up and doesn't want to speak to me because he states that I look down on him for wanting to have what everyone else has, and he has a right to have what he wants.
I choose now to ignore his emails because he is just looking for a fight, and I don't want the drama.
Your thoughts? Would you mind your own business, or would you go all out and tell the person what is on your mind, even if you don't want to get drawn into a fight that could last for a millennia on the net? 
7 people like this
10 responses
@stephcjh (38473)
• United States
11 Sep 11
You are right. Common sense tells me to pay for the things we have to have first and then buy what we would like to have if the funds are there to provide for it. Joe Blow needs to realise that even though they have a nice Big Screen TV.... they have no electric to run it LOL. I don't fight with people like that either. I just ignore them and move on. They suck my positive energy out. Alot of these people know better but they just do what they want anyway and hope for someone else to take care of their other bills for them so they can enjoy that big screen tv. Those people help this person out and they do not even have a big screen tv themselves or they work very hard to pay all of their bills and pay for their tv too without asking others to do it for them!
3 people like this
@PointlessQuestions (15397)
• United States
11 Sep 11
You said a mouthful there Steph! That is true, people like Joe Blow suck the energy out of me too. I know he has to know better about a lot of things.. such as feeding his family and putting clothes on them. A huge TV isn't going to put clothes on their little bodies. I guess they could pawn it if their shoes start falling off!
4 people like this
@hardworkinggurl (37062)
• United States
11 Sep 11
Hi PQ!
If I am asked as you stated in an email and or directly about what my opinion is, although I can be sensitive to the person, knowing upfront what they are like. I will still give my opinion. Now if the person is sensitive and misunderstands my constructive opinion, then next time I am asked I will simply say to the person; because you are asking and it will lead to a misunderstanding I am not sure if you want me to agree and or tell you what I feel.
We are not mind readers and unless the person during the asking that they only want me to agree then, basically I would tell the person how I feel. Now if the person is specifically looking for a fight each time, then depending on what it is I may respond with you did what you felt you had to do and or simply ignore him also. I have enough stress in my life without adding to it with petty stuff.
If I am asked as you stated in an email and or directly about what my opinion is, although I can be sensitive to the person, knowing upfront what they are like. I will still give my opinion. Now if the person is sensitive and misunderstands my constructive opinion, then next time I am asked I will simply say to the person; because you are asking and it will lead to a misunderstanding I am not sure if you want me to agree and or tell you what I feel.
We are not mind readers and unless the person during the asking that they only want me to agree then, basically I would tell the person how I feel. Now if the person is specifically looking for a fight each time, then depending on what it is I may respond with you did what you felt you had to do and or simply ignore him also. I have enough stress in my life without adding to it with petty stuff. 2 people like this
@PointlessQuestions (15397)
• United States
11 Sep 11
Good afternoon HWG! It is always so nice to see your pretty avatar on my discussion, and your good common sense responses. Yeah, I will take their cues... I would normally just say what I would do in a situation, and then when that is leading to a heated discussion because the person doesn't like what I said, for whatever reason, I will just leave it alone. So far, I have refrained from saying what I REALLY think. I would love to say: [b]If you had any common sense, you would take care of your family's needs before getting things you don't need.
[/b]
But I choose to mind my own business and live as stress free as possible.
4 people like this
@hardworkinggurl (37062)
• United States
11 Sep 11
I don't blame you because anyone like this does not want "help" they want others to agree so they can comfort their bad decisions. 
1 person likes this
@stephcjh (38473)
• United States
11 Sep 11
Amen to that!!!!! Some of these people do have common sense but they want to bum off of other people when it comes to paying the bills they should have paid from the start and done without that big screen tv. Alot of them just want to sit around and enjoy these high dollar items and then not do a dang thing to pay their bills. I cannot feel sorry for people like that. I work hard for everything we get and to make sure the bills are paid and food is on the table first. I do not bum money from people or put my WANTS first.
I agree. I stay away from people like that because they bring me negative energy. I do not have the time for the begging, whining and bumming they like to do. I don't comfort their bad decisions either. They DO know better!
4 people like this
@ANTIQUELADY (36440)
• United States
11 Sep 11
If someone doesn't want my opinion they better not ask for it. I am not a sugar coater. I wouldn't fight w/him either online or not.Sounds like your joe blow is a typical male.
@PointlessQuestions (15397)
• United States
11 Sep 11
Yep, from my point of view many males want their own way no matter what.. even if it costs them their family's well being.
1 person likes this
@SpikeTheLobster (6399)
•
11 Sep 11
Mine's a philosophical approach. There is no right or wrong, there is only opinion.
When the vast majority of people agree about something, it is considered true and therefore becomes "right" or "wrong". However, when there are only two people involved, there is no majority, so there is only opinion.
If your opinion differs to his, that's fine. If he won't accept that your opinion differs, that's his loss: he has closed his mind to half of the options available to him and therefore limited himself to only the outcomes he can achieve by following his own opinion. If that ends in disaster, he can only blame himself.
I'd probably do what you'd do: say that I wouldn't do it myself and leave it at that.
He chooses to believe he is "entitled" to something that's a luxury and blow all his cash on it? Fine. When he comes back and moans about the fact that he's got no money, that his TV's been cut off and that he can't afford to eat, you get to smile and say "I told you so." 
Ain't it great what capitalism and a materialistic society does to people's values? 
Ain't it great what capitalism and a materialistic society does to people's values? 1 person likes this
@SpikeTheLobster (6399)
•
11 Sep 11
You're missing a golden opportunity...
He buys a massive TV.
He can't afford food.
You could buy his TV for 20% of the retail price (hey, it's used) so he can buy food. Then you resell it on eBay. Sorted!
2 people like this
@PointlessQuestions (15397)
• United States
11 Sep 11
Yep, I would probably think "I told you so" in my mind, but I probably would just ignore the comment that he has no electricity to watch his TV and can't even watch DVDs.. poor guy! It's amazing how this guy will spend his money on basically stuff he doesn't need and ignore his family's needs... and then cry that everyone else has stuff so why shouldn't he.. and at the same time try to stick his hand into my pocket. Well, his hand will get slapped if he tries to get into my pockets. I don't have money to waste, and buying him food and stuff is just wasteful when he doesn't have the sense that God gave him to take care of his own needs? He can find some other joker to con.
It's amazing how this guy will spend his money on basically stuff he doesn't need and ignore his family's needs... and then cry that everyone else has stuff so why shouldn't he.. and at the same time try to stick his hand into my pocket. Well, his hand will get slapped if he tries to get into my pockets. I don't have money to waste, and buying him food and stuff is just wasteful when he doesn't have the sense that God gave him to take care of his own needs? He can find some other joker to con.5 people like this
@PointlessQuestions (15397)
• United States
11 Sep 11
You are BRILLIANT!!! Who would a thunk it? Not me! That might be just something I do too. I just got a big paycheck from my writing.. over $800... oh but actually... I just don't have a place to put the TV, AND I have other things to do with my money...like buy food myself.. pay the water and gas bill and put the rest toward some glasses... I'm about blind from all the scratches on the ones I'm wearing. If I were more of an opportunist, I might just do something like that...lol! I should be! But then he would cry because I cheated him with only 20% when his food is all gone!
But then he would cry because I cheated him with only 20% when his food is all gone!4 people like this
@bird123 (10658)
• United States
11 Sep 11
This is an easy one. If Joe is your friend, tell him the entire truth. No one can guaranty the actions of another. You can control your actions. Regardless of how angry Joe gets, you are doing him a great kindness by telling him what he doesn't want to hear. Maybe after a time Joe will cool off and really think about things. Give Joe lots of love and kindness after that. Joe will come to realize just how good a friend you are to have around. A true friend always tells you the truth even when you don't care to hear it. Are you really a friend if you don't??
1 person likes this
@mommyboo (13174)
• United States
12 Sep 11
Ugh. Sometimes people you think are your friends aren't really. They don't want to hear the truth about anything and often accuse you of being mean or unsupportive if you tell them the truth. They expect because they are your friend that you will continue to allow them to do things you know are detrimental to their well being or their family's well being and not object to it.
Sorry to say if someone cuts you off after you insist on telling them the truth anyway, what kind of friend were THEY?
Joe doesn't get it. Not everyone has what he wants, and those who do paid their bills first lol! DUH.
@PointlessQuestions (15397)
• United States
14 Sep 11
Exactly! I pay my bills. I work for the extra I get. I don't have the stuff that Joe has. But at least I can put food on my table. Joe is an idiot for the value system he has. He wants what he wants. He gets it and then tries to get into other people's pockets for his needs.
3 people like this
@PointlessQuestions (15397)
• United States
11 Sep 11
I've already said my piece and he gets mad because my opinion isn't his own.. the rest is up to him. He has a brain and can figure things out on his own. Maybe he needs to learn by his own mistakes. He's not really what I would call a friend.. he's just someone I know on the Net and I think he thinks I'm an easy mark to mooch off from, and I'm not. He thinks he can give me a sob story and I will do without myself so he can have the luxuries he can't afford. I don't even have luxuries like what he wants.. he has a Mercedes frame of mind with a clunker pocketbook. He can go mooch off someone else, if that is what he thinks he needs to do.
3 people like this
@cowgirl03051979 (918)
• United States
12 Sep 11
no that does not mean that your opinion is wrong just because it is different than someone elses and i know there are stupid people on here that will post saying that no your opinion is not wrong but turn right around and argue with you on something where you are allowed to have different opinions but i know that some of the stuff that i know is right that i want to stand up for would end up getting me kicked off of here so i have keep my mouth shut even though it is something i am very passionate about now tell me is that right or wrong?
1 person likes this
@PointlessQuestions (15397)
• United States
14 Sep 11
Knowing when to keep your comments to yoursel is a good thing. It oreseves your place here on the Lot. And yes. There will always be oeoe here that will attack you for either side of the fence you stand on. We both know this probably isn't our first rodeo.
1 person likes this
@AmbiePam (120592)
• United States
14 Sep 11
I wish more people would tell the Joe Blows of the world what you told this person. I'm seeing a lot of people ask questions they know the answers to, they just want at least one person out of many to tell them it's okay to do not what they should do, but what they want to do.
@PointlessQuestions (15397)
• United States
14 Sep 11
This guy is a real nut case, in my opinion. We were talking about church once and he said he wasn't going to go to church. Said the last time he went to church he asked the preacher to baptize him and he said the pressure told him he needed to get saved first. Hexalways seems to feel entitled. And he gets angry if you don't do what he wants you too. I kind of just ignore him.
1 person likes this
@weasel81 (2496)
• Australia
11 Sep 11
Bit like my friend, she got asked if she would like to ride in a women's buck jump competition. She was all for it!!!! but everyone else was a no, she had other things to think about. I didn't say much on the matter, expect she should wear a protective vest and helmet. She also has 2 young kids to think about, i'm not one to always say what's on my mind. but a friend of her's did tall her she would be crazy. My friends partner also used to ride rodeo when he was younger, and so did mine. I don't think she ended up competing, her partner finally put a stop to it. But at the same time i could see the fun in doing it, maybe if i was about 10 years younger and didnt have the responsiblties.
Some people need to realise there are more important things in life, than having a big tv or something. Some once on a path of their getting that item, wont stop till they do.
No opinion is wrong or right, we all think differently. money issues are sensitive, maybe mention it, and leave it at that. his wife might leave him eventually if he keeps it up.
@PointlessQuestions (15397)
• United States
11 Sep 11
I certainly wouldn't put my life in danger when I have kids to take care of.. but that is why people make up their own minds and do stupid stuff sometimes.. they don't think things out very well. I'm glad that sometimes someone can get through to people.. i'm not going to push myself on anyone.. I say what I would do, and let it be that.
3 people like this
@Hatley (163772)
• Garden Grove, California
11 Sep 11
hi pointlessquestions I was in a similar situation yesterday about my new discussion and wound up defending myself against a very malicous response,well two responses telling me how mean I was
and how stupid and worthless my discussions and on and on.,so yes the discussion was deleted but not for the malicious reason that
the mylotter gave me but because she would not shut up so the reason given was it was devolving into a flaming war.so I have learned to keep my mouth shut on some topics here.And go on about my own business.Its easy for a person to tell him how wrong he is but it does no
good really and as you say the fight could go on and on.
good really and as you say the fight could go on and on.@PointlessQuestions (15397)
• United States
11 Sep 11
Hi Mrs. Hatley! Sorry I missed that discussion.. I would have liked to have seen that one, and I would have jumped in and defended you. Yes, we do have to be careful about what we say, because NO MATTER how much people say they want the truth, they just can't handle it when we give them the truth they don't want to hear!
Take care, dear one.. and don't let anyone hurt you deep inside. Keep it on the outside so it can't get in.... some folks are just too dang sensitive and don't want the truth.. knowing that.. I don't give it to them if I think they will attack me with it.
3 people like this
