Accept the pity or not?

Yes being that you are a good contributor to the troop I would say it is okay to accept the help. It is not like you are doing so all the time, so why not this once. As for Halloween costumes, do you have a Goodwill and or a Salvation Army near you where you could be creative and cheaply get something there. Otherwise you can try and be creative with what they already have as Halloween is about being creative and why spend a great deal on a costume they will only wear once. Times are hard and in order to get by we must do what we have to do to get by and if fun being included we can only do so much.

3Snuggle Bu nnies oh do let her go, as I feel the leader knows y our circumstances and is not going to blat it to any one else as everyone has times when they need just a little help but are not destined for welfare. the economy has hit all the people here in the US really hard. no shame in having trouble making ends meet as a lot of us are doing just that too.just let her go and when you get your tax refund do as you suggested. you will feel better about it and your brownie daughter will love it that she gets to go.I am sure they do not see you as a charity case at all. thats just your own pride.the money tree is kaput in my own s tead and all over the us too so you are not alone. I havehad to pay my copay on the amubulance trips when I fell and when I had a diabetic coma in 25 dollar pieces it was 150 but I have it down now to 75 dollars and they are bearing with me too.so anything I earn on the net really does help me a lot.good luc k and God bless hugs from Hatley

Think of it like a "do unto others" moment. It will be good for them to be generous, your son will benefit from it, and in the future you can either make a donation to the troop, or in some other way contribute. It all comes back to you. But I understand how sometimes it is hard to let other people help when you want so badly to take care of every single thing for your family, yourself.

I think you should accept the help. I am not saying it is something that I would do on a regular basis, but I would accept the help so that one of my kids could go on a field trip. I would just feel bad that they would not be able to go with their friends. You do contribute to scouting, so it is not really a hand out.

Sorry for the late response. I know it doesn't feel good to be a charity case, but if you have done so much for the troop when others will not, I think you have earned the trip. If you are worried about it, you can make some kind of contribution when you do have the money. Did she have fun on the trip? I hope things are going better for you now. Have a great weekend!!!

It is not a hand out but a helping hand and I would just accept the offer graciously. I am sure that when you have it you do pay your way and probably help other people or their kids too. Let your child go please. My greatest sin is that I am proud and I have to fight against this so much. take the help my friend

I think you should discuss it with your child. She may feel mortified when she discovers later that you accepted charity on her behalf. On the other hand, maybe she'll be fine with it and want to make a donation at tax time. I would talk with her and see how she feels about it, give her some control of the situation. Children learn thrift and how to handle life's problems when they have to miss a trip because of money. It hurts the parents but the child learns a valuable lesson and usually grows up determined to succeed so to spare their child that deprivation. If never given that lesson, they will grow up to take everything for granted and not be equipped to handle life's problems.

Yeah, I know the feeling. You're broke, but you don't really want the whole world to know. Plus, to some people $14 doesn't seem like a whole lot! I remember a couple years ago things were so tough on us it wasn't even funny. I was literally returning my bottles and cans to buy necessary foods like bread to get us through a couple of days. I don't remember many times that were quite so bad. The school year was winding down, and I was getting notes from the teachers about things the kids were getting ready to do. My daughter needed a plain white t-shirt that the kids were going to tye-dye for their end of the year field days, and both kids needed $2 because all the kids of that grade were going to walk down to the ice cream place and get ice cream cones. Well I had no plain white t-shirts and couldn't afford to go buy one, and I had no money to send them for ice cream. I felt pathetic.. how could I not come up with $2 for an ice cream cone? I debated not sending them that day, as awful as that would be. Then I decided to e-mail the teachers and explain my situation. I went into the whole bit of returning bottles and cans for bread, just so they understood how bad my situation was, because to me it seemed awful to say I couldn't afford $2. My daughter's teacher replied and said it was taken care of, not to worry. My son came home with a note from his teacher. In the note was a $20 bill. I about cried. The note mentioned how he'd been hurting pretty bad while going through his schooling, and he was thankful for his friends and family who helped, etc. So he wanted to help me out. Well, needless to say I wasn't looking for a hand out, I just wanted my kids to be able to go have an ice cream cone with their class. So I returned the $20 with a thanks but no thanks letter.

Actually, it's not that pitiful to accept help. The leader fully knows your situation so he is making it easy for you by paying it himself first, since he knows that someday , you can repay him. Or maybe he doesn't expect that it be returned at all, and he really just wanted to help. Go for it, so your eldest could go.