Being hated for no reasons
By Yanzalong
@yanzalong (19091)
Indonesia
July 4, 2012 2:24am CST
Do you sometimes find yourself being hated for no reasons?
I often eat out. There is a restaurant where I eat. I love this restaurant as i can spend some time mylotting there after I eat my meal. This has been my favorite restaurant for 4 years. Just recently i've noticed that there are 2 waiters who put on a long face every time i eat there. They were nice to me before. The other waiters have been so friendly except the 2 guys. What would you do if you were me?
3 people like this
11 responses
@sid556 (30953)
• United States
6 Jul 12
Well, that seems kind of odd. It sounds as if something must have bothered them. I might talk to them and ask if it bothered me enough. Otherwise, I'd probably just ignore it. Others have mentioned that it could be that you sit at the table after eating and that could be possible. I know from past experience that someone who sits at a table for long periods prevents other patrons from sitting there. A waitress is paid very little money and relies on tips. Since each waitress is assigned certain tables on their shift then whoever gets you has at least one table that is not going to earn her much for the night. Do you tip well for the the time you spend at the table? Another possibility ..do you stay there right until closing? Most restraunts stop serving after a certain time and then the waitresses start clean up in hopes of getting out of there on time. If someone is sitting in the dining area, it just holds up the process. Getting paid so little, no one really wants to stay any later than they have to. I guess the only way you are going to know for sure is to ask them.
@sid556 (30953)
• United States
7 Jul 12
Oh I see. Well if all the others are nice to you then I would just ignore it too. Maybe it's not you at all. Maybe they are just grumpy...maybe tired of the job itself? I wouldn't worry about it. You are the customer and no matter what their problem is...you do have a right to be there. Truthfully...even IF, for whatever reason, they had a problem with you then they still should not be letting it show. Part of their job is to be courteous and friendly.
There is a girl who works the opposite shift from me at the store I work at. I have had customers come in and tell me that they think she hates them. She is so grumpy, rolls her eyes, mutters under her breath etc. I've assured them that it isn't just them. Apparently, enough of them have gone to my boss to complain because she has been warned that one more complaint and she is all done. It's too bad because other than that, she is a good worker. Smiling and being friendly is so important though when working with the public. You are not letting it keep you from enjoying your time there (and you shouldn't) but some people just would not go back. Your friend has a right to know how they are treating you. If they are treating others the same then it is really not good for his business.
1 person likes this
@sid556 (30953)
• United States
7 Jul 12
Oh and I wanted to add that even though I listed in my initial response 2 possible reasons for why they might be acting the way they are, I should have included in that response that those may be "reasons" but it still does NOT make it ok to treat you that way. You ARE a paying customer and neither of those reasons justifies them making you feel anything short of welcome there.
1 person likes this
@yanzalong (19091)
• Indonesia
7 Jul 12
I don't think it has something to do with my staying there after eating. There must be something else I am not sure of. However, I think I have to just ignore it as the others (15 other waiters) are nice to me. Thank for responding sid556.
1 person likes this
@PageTurner (2825)
• United States
6 Jul 12
Hello yanzalong
Yes, I do know what it's like to be hated for no reason. When I was a child living in Hawaii, I had many classmates who I considered to be my friends. Then one day they met me in the playground and commenced to beating me. I was so confused and I asked them how they, my friends, could do this to me? They said that their parents found out that I wasn't their race, therefore, I was to be hated. So they decided to hate me.
If I was you, I would ask those waiters if there was a problem. It could be that I was reading more into their long faces than was actually there and that their long faces had nothing to do with me. As I am an excellent tipper, I would know that that wouldn't be the reason for their perceived dislike of me.
One thing is for sure. If I didn't get a satisfactory answer from them I would not eat there again. I will not eat anywhere that I have to worry about food tampering, and I would worry about that if I suspected the wait staff held something against me.
I hope that it works out for you.
Peace
@yanzalong (19091)
• Indonesia
7 Jul 12
Thank you page turner. If you have time to visit Indonesia, let me know. Who knows I can do something for you during your stay in Indonesia. Happy mylotting.
2 people like this
@yanzalong (19091)
• Indonesia
6 Jul 12
page turner, that is an excellent advice for me. Thank you so much for your response. I appreciate it.
2 people like this
@PageTurner (2825)
• United States
6 Jul 12
I hope that you are able to reach a satisfactory solution, yanzalong, especially since it is your favorite place to eat.
1 person likes this
@Hatley (163772)
• Garden Grove, California
13 Jul 12
yanzalong are you sure they really hate you? Hate is a strong emotion. I would make it a point if they wait on you to
give them a nice tip and a smile. maybe they are the moneygrubber type and a little moolah might bring a more courteous attitude
Or say in a joking way"what did I do to make you look so sour?"
It might work but seriously
ignore them or glare back at them.
try the tip though as so me people are s o money oriented.
ignore them or glare back at them.try the tip though as so me people are s o money oriented.@yanzalong (19091)
• Indonesia
22 Nov 12
Hatley, I finally decided to give him a blind eye. Thank for the suggestion my friend.
@trisha27 (3494)
• United States
27 Nov 12
If I were you I would just ignore it and their reactions. Maybe they are having a bad day when you walk in. Whatever the situation or whatever is going on don't mind it at all. Besides you came in to eat. Maybe if they have a certain section that they wait at, then when you see them around then maybe you could ask to be seated somewhere else, or if you are able to seat yourself, then try and not sit in their section. That is the only advice I can give you.
@bhabycatch013 (9150)
• Philippines
4 Jul 12
hi yanzalong,
Well I will just ignore it as long as they will give me good services and will not poison me.
If I can't take it maybe I can call them and ask them can you give me a glass of water please oh by the way include your smile there hahaha!
There are people who hate others without any reasons.
happy mylotting
@yanzalong (19091)
• Indonesia
4 Jul 12
You are right. I have ignored them. Whats the use of thinking of them. My time is more valuable for others. Thank for responding.
@jobfindonline (1744)
•
4 Jul 12
wow babycatch I like your answer
that's the right way to tell them that you noticed what's wrong in their face. I will try this one time and see how would they respond.
that's the right way to tell them that you noticed what's wrong in their face. I will try this one time and see how would they respond.@bhabycatch013 (9150)
• Philippines
6 Jul 12
@ jfo,
Tell us if you do this and if it is an effective one 
@natliegleb (5173)
• India
19 Nov 12
if they hate you ,just leave them and come past,there are so many people in this world ,there is no need for us to stick with them,for every action there is an equal and opposite reaction
@yanzalong (19091)
• Indonesia
22 Nov 12
Hi bro, that is nice. I finally did what you said. There is no use thinking about it, isn't there?
@Lauraleigh99 (4718)
• United States
4 Jul 12
I would ask one of the waiters that is nice to you why they act that way or ask the 2 waiters themselves if they have a problem with you. That is weird they were nice to you at one time and now aren't.
@yanzalong (19091)
• Indonesia
4 Jul 12
Yes, I found it weird, too. I will act on your advice later. I will ask the manager about it. This is the best solution. Thank you for your info.
@allknowing (153544)
• India
4 Jul 12
That must be their natural expression. Why don't you strike a conversation with them and see how they react?
@yanzalong (19091)
• Indonesia
4 Jul 12
I did. They gave me the cold shoulder. But I will find out about it later. Thank for responding.
@fashionfever (2200)
• Indonesia
4 Jul 12
Jealousy! I bet they are jealous at you, i have had the same experience but most of the sales who treat me unfriendly are girls but I often get compliment if the sales is male or old lady. I went to a store to buy my craft supplies and the sales girl treat me so bad, she stared at me from my hair to my toes, i dont know what was her problem with me, she didn't serve me well so I feel not comfortable to shop there and I prefer to buy from another store. If I were you I would still eat there, especially if the restaurant has delicious meal and affordable price. Just ignore the 2 guys, perhaps they are only jealous at you.
@yanzalong (19091)
• Indonesia
5 Jul 12
You may be right about it. I have tried to forget it. I would want to lose my time just thinking about this trivial things. There are so many valuable things I have to concentrate on. Thank for your advice.
@enelym001 (8322)
• Philippines
4 Jul 12
I think I don't need to do anything. Most people spend quite a long time eating and sitting. They aren't the owners and there are no rules or policies advising customers to leave once they are done with their meals.
@yanzalong (19091)
• Indonesia
4 Jul 12
There might have been something I did that hurt them but I am sure I did not do anything that hurt them. I came there to eat and I paid.
@jobfindonline (1744)
•
4 Jul 12
I never had an experience like this in a restaurant but if ever I would experience I think I will let them know that I'm aware of their acts in a smart way, it's very impolite to show those attitude especially in a regular client like you. They should be in their best behavior before you kidding, that's too much but at least the kindness to treat a customer must be there. If they have something against you, they can always approach you. You may also ask them, "Is there anything that you would like to say?"
kidding, that's too much but at least the kindness to treat a customer must be there. If they have something against you, they can always approach you. You may also ask them, "Is there anything that you would like to say?"@yanzalong (19091)
• Indonesia
4 Jul 12
Hi jobfindonline, thank you for your suggestion. I will do that later. Now, I just have to be patient. I go to that restaurant almost everyday.
