You Just Never Know...
By Jeff Moffitt
@moffittjc (128824)
Gainesville, Florida
November 16, 2015 8:58pm CST
Sometimes people avoid you for one reason or another. Or, at least that may be what is seems on the surface. But give some consideration before giving up on them. They many not be avoiding you, they may just be:
1. Experiencing a sudden life change that required their immediate attention.
2. Perhaps they are struggling, and working hard just to make ends meet.
3. Maybe they've been dealt a hard blow, and they are closing themselves off from the outside world in order to make sense of the situation.
4. They could be suffering from personal pain or illness.
5. It could be they have grown tired of pretending to be okay, when in reality they are not.
6. They could simply be doing everything they can to survive.
7. They want to talk to you about something personal, but they just don't know how to reach out.
Please, don't make quick judgements on your friends, family or acquaintances. You just never know what they are going through in their lives!
14 people like this
12 responses
@moffittjc (128824)
• Gainesville, Florida
17 Nov 15
I'm kind of going through that now. Dealing with some personal health issues, I've shut myself off from the world around me for a few weeks so I can focus on healing.
2 people like this
@LadyDuck (502189)
• Italy
17 Nov 15
@moffittjc In my opinion we should not make an effort to be sociable when we feel the need to be left alone.
@moffittjc (128824)
• Gainesville, Florida
17 Nov 15
@LadyDuck But maybe we can communicate better to others around us that we need time alone. Most people would be understanding. Except for my two children, I really didn't tell anyone I was going to be out for surgery (well, I notified my employer). So now everyone has been wondering where I've been for the past week. And I really just don't feel like dealing with all of them right now! lol
1 person likes this
@annierose (21977)
• United States
24 Nov 16
I do agree with you. It is easy to judge. It seems very natural to us. I am also one of them. It is not okay and I am trying to remind myself not to judge. We cannot just jump into conclusions easily.
1 person likes this
@moffittjc (128824)
• Gainesville, Florida
24 Nov 16
I think it is human nature to judge others, based on our own perceptions of reality. We just have to realize that not everyone else is like us, or has had the same experiences as us.
1 person likes this
@annierose (21977)
• United States
25 Nov 16
@moffittjc That is true. Being an open minded person will help us immensely in our personality growth. I dream to be a person who is calm. It is not easy but I am trying.
1 person likes this
@moffittjc (128824)
• Gainesville, Florida
25 Nov 16
@annierose At least you're trying! That's the important thing! Many people don't realize that personality growth is a life-long learning process!
1 person likes this
@DeborahDiane (40843)
• Laguna Woods, California
17 Nov 15
You are absolutely right. Many of us take things personally, when another person's solitary behavior has nothing to do with us.
1 person likes this
@moffittjc (128824)
• Gainesville, Florida
17 Nov 15
It's just hard when we get no explanations of why someone seemingly shut down on us. Sometimes, just some simple communication would help to ease a whole lot of stress and unanswered questions. Although that's much easier said than done though! Communication is never as easy as it should be!
@Castlerock34 (2255)
• Minneapolis, Minnesota
17 Nov 15
Love this! My biggest pet peeve is when I pour my heart out to someone or try to explain my feelings for a certain situation and all they say is "okay". I mean what the hell is wrong with you? Thats when I decide to tuck everything inside and I don't let people in because I just made myself more vulnerable. ugh
@moffittjc (128824)
• Gainesville, Florida
17 Nov 15
It is hard when we open ourselves up and let our emotions out there. We always run the risk of having it come back to bite us in the you-know-what! But don't give up hope, sometimes it just means finding the right person to open up to!
@moffittjc (128824)
• Gainesville, Florida
17 Nov 15
@Castlerock34 You are a human being, we are emotional creatures, so it is natural to go through what you are going through right now. Just don't let it harden your heart to the point where you shut out every single person you encounter throughout your life. Hang in there, it's perfectly acceptable to closely guard your emotions right now.
1 person likes this
@Castlerock34 (2255)
• Minneapolis, Minnesota
17 Nov 15
@moffittjc I feel like I can't open up anymore, Ive opened up so much and I am hurting right now. Its going to be hard to let someone else in. I just have to try to get over this person
@VivaLaDani13 (60812)
• Perth, Australia
22 Nov 16
@moffittjc I love this. It's very true and I can relate. I've had so many people not even bother to try and understand certain things going on in my life or even in my head. It's ok to not know what to do when someone isn't feeling their best but it does make me feel bad when people just don't even want to try and understand that something personal could be going on. Instead people tend to take things personally or get overly defensive and get in attack mode which only exacerbates things. People need to try to stop and think before assuming they know.
1 person likes this
@moffittjc (128824)
• Gainesville, Florida
23 Nov 16
By the way, how are you doing? Haven't heard from you in a while. I know you were taking some time off for yourself, which I admire. Just hoping that you're okay. I miss you!
1 person likes this
@moffittjc (128824)
• Gainesville, Florida
24 Nov 16
@VivaLaDani13 I look forward to hearing from you! I miss our conversations!
1 person likes this
@VivaLaDani13 (60812)
• Perth, Australia
23 Nov 16
@moffittjc I am fine thank you. Will message you a bit later though so I don't have to type it here. I miss you too!
1 person likes this
@much2say (57760)
• Los Angeles, California
17 Nov 15
Very true. Believe me there have been times when I just wanted to put a bag over my head and go hide in a cave - I've actually felt that way recently. Yep, no one should be quick to judge especially when they are not seeing the whole picture. (This is SmilePie by the way!).
@moffittjc (128824)
• Gainesville, Florida
17 Nov 15
I'm going through that now. I've been mentally, emotionally and physically exhausted, and seemingly at wits end. Thankfully, I had to have hernia surgery this past week, and it basically is forcing me to give my body and mind a rest. Just what I needed to recharge my batteries.
@Marilynda1225 (91013)
• United States
17 Nov 15
Well said and certainly all valid reasons for avoiding or being avoided. I tend to shut myself off when I am going through things that are difficult to handle
@ElizabethWallace (12069)
• United States
17 Nov 15
This is all very true, but after they disappear for several years, (no matter the reason) it's over. Move on.
@moffittjc (128824)
• Gainesville, Florida
18 Nov 15
For sure! If someone disappears for that long, then you should move on (or if you disappear for that long, they should move on).
1 person likes this
@just4him (323168)
• Green Bay, Wisconsin
17 Nov 15
That is so true. We all want a second chance in life, so do the people we associate with.
@Katlynn (366)
• United States
23 Nov 15
Human nature causes us to jump to the wrong conclusion, even feel rejected before finding out 'why' someone is being distant. It's always best to give some space on the chance someone is going through something and needs time for themselves. Good advice you have!
