I Wouldn't Cry Over It
By IvySaysHi
@IvySaysHi (4603)
United States
May 6, 2016 11:13am CST
My mother just texted me with a bunch of broken heart emoticons telling me that my stepdad told her she dresses like an old lady. She seems to be really hurt and that is understandable because my mom is sensitive especially when it comes to things said or done by people close to her. I don't know if she really is crying about it, but I wouldn't cry over it.
I told her if his comment is such a big problem she can either fix it mentally and just keep in mind she dresses the way she does because it makes her comfortable or she can fix it physically and just try dressing differently. I've seen my mom dress up and she can make herself look very nice.
How would you react if your significant other of 4 years told you something like that? Would you change the way you dress?
1 person likes this
5 responses
@yukimori (10193)
• United States
6 May 16
I'd tell her "Mom, that's between you and Stepdad. You need to talk to him about his hurtful comments instead of dragging me into it."
Neither of the options you listed is a good one. "Fixing it mentally" equates to ignoring what he said, while "fixing it physically" means she has to acknowledge that he's right and she's dressing like an old lady, which is a "problem" that should be addressed.
If my husband were to say something like that to me, I'd call him out on his disrespect. There's a difference between constructive criticism and hurtful commentary, and the comment about dressing like an old lady definitely falls into the latter category.
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@IvySaysHi (4603)
• United States
6 May 16
honestly i dont take it seriously cause usually when he says stuff like that he is joking around with her and she is easily offended/hurt
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@IvySaysHi (4603)
• United States
6 May 16
@IvySaysHi and she tells him he looks like a chihuahua all the time so
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@rona07 (1641)
• Philippines
7 May 16
Hmmm. Idk, it depends on how my hubby will say it. I mean i cn tell if he is jst.joking or not. And if he is way serious to me. I look at myself.in the mirror again. If for me i feel good with it then ill carry on..if i am doubting then ill consider changing.
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@ricki_911 (21625)
• Toronto, Ontario
6 May 16
I'd find it offensive. Yes, I know if I walked around in mypajamas all the time never getting dressed up. But some people have high expectations. I dated a guy for 2 years who literally expected me to do things yet he shouldn't. He once called me fat and I was like buddy you gained over 100 pounds I am still the same weight maybe within5 pounds. I think it may be his how self esteem and insecurities. Noone would say that to a loved one they love you either way.
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@Sweetsona (300)
• India
8 May 16
He might be having a little fun with her.. Its normal in a relationship. She could ask for his credit card for some new dresses. They have been together four years, they must be comfortable with each other by now
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