It has been five years but yet.....

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9th October 2014, we lost him to Cancer. He fought with all spirit and grace for three long years and finally gave up one morning. I am talking about my father in law who was such a gentleman and a wonderful person. A man of fine thoughts and action, he was loved and respected by all around him. And he always treated and supported me like a daughter. It has been five years and I still feel the deep pain. He had a healthy lifestyle and did not drink or smoke. At 77, he was as active as any youth and free of all ailments. We bet that he will cross 100 years.He hardly had to visit doctor in his life. Very punctual and disciplined for his diet and exercise, he led a very active life. But at 77, a car accident changed everything. He lost his two young grandsons in the accident and could not bear that loss. It impacted him deeply. His spine and backbone was damaged and he had 18 hour long surgery to fix it. He fought back with good spirit and then recovered fast for his age. But in next six months, he developed constant sore throat and his voice was always gone for a toss. What was mistaken for a common prolonged sore throat turned out to be a deadly throat cancer. He lost his voice box and had to walk with a hole in his neck. He had to be trained to talk without voice box closing that hole with his thumb and making sounds. He coped well. But soon the malignancy traveled to other parts and he showed deterioration in his health but he kept his spirit high. He spend his last four years of life staying with us. I drove him to doctors and to his chemos. I wanted to have every last moment of his company. He kept talking to me all the time. When he could not talk, he wrote. Whenever he had energy he sat down to spend quality family time. Was jovial and playful with my daughters. But slowly cancer ate him. A six foot tall football player and a disciplined police officer was reduced to skeleton in few months. He was bed ridden and got hospitalized frequently. Then he was kept on life support system for few days. We knew he hated it and so we as a family took decision to bring him back home with all equipment and nurse. And he opened his eyes for a day, smiled at his children, their spouses and grandchildren and finally passed away at 81. I could not write this post on 9th. Husband and I woke up with that vacuum in our heart. Later in evening we visited temple and then to orphanage to donate some food and stationery items. This is fifth year and in Hindu ritual we celebrate it according to tithi( planetary position). So there is a ritual on 14th and my husband will go to his native to perform that. Others from family will also join on 14th. I will not be able to make it as elder one has exams going on. Husband has left today for a business summit for two days and from there he will fly to his native and spend two days with his mom and perform the rituals. Though he has left us, he has left behind so many things in his legacy and we will always remember him with all love and respect.