What Do I feel Today?

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I just want to runaway from where I am right now and breathe for a moment in a place where I can dream and just enjoy the nature that surrounds me. Life is too toxic ever since, but there is no other way but to hang in there and just try not only to survive but to make everything better. I don't want to survive my every day, I want to make it better and better, not perfect but I want to be in control of the things that I can control, I want to be someone who can make a difference for the better. I want to leave this place that I am in, and try to see the other side of my world. I don't want the tide to move me, I want to stand still and pick the places I want to explore. I don't want to be dictated but instead I want to start running my life without fear! How about you? What are the things you want to end right now and what are the things that you fear most but you really want to try that you think you will really grow as a better person?