So many ups and downs
@GardenGerty (169406)
United States
January 16, 2023 6:46am CST
Yolanda is speaking, but mostly all anyone understands is "I want to go home". Actually before her first surgery she told me "I want to go home, I can die at home as well as in a hospital." Personally I believe there is more there cognitively than we are hearing and seeing, because she has not got the strength and volume to speak clearly. Her dentures are not in.Her youngest daughter says she is speaking gibberish. However she asks me about her balance on her money card and other things. I just cannot understand her.
The doctors feel she is lacking cognitive function and because of the plaque in all of her arteries, from her brain to her lungs, and intestines she is basically a time bomb fixing to go off.
In order for her to move out of ICU they have to remove the "central line" which is an IV where she is provided with fluid and nutrition. They will attempt to feed her with an "NG" tube, (naso gastric to her stomach) which also is a temporary measure. Next step would be a peg tube(stomach feeding tube) for feeding. Her oldest daughter says "no more holes punched in her" so we will not be doing that. Probably no more IV's. If we want to set up Palliative care or Hospice those measures are not used. She will be kept comfortable.
Both of her daughters are nurses. Both are very broken up, but know the odds.
It is hitting me hard.
14 people like this
14 responses
@DaddyEvil (174208)
• United States
16 Jan 23
@DianneN You're very welcome. I know exactly how you feel.
2 people like this
@DianneN (254949)
• United States
16 Jan 23
@DaddyEvil Thanks so much for explaining DE. I hate being out of the loop. The poor woman.
2 people like this
@GardenGerty (169406)
• United States
16 Jan 23
@DianneN @DaddyEvil Explained pretty well. I was a part time care giver for her as she was classified "frail elderly". While you were away my husband also had many health crises. I continue to work as well.
2 people like this
@BarBaraPrz (51811)
• St. Catharines, Ontario
16 Jan 23
Maybe if they gave her back her dentures they might understand her better.
3 people like this
@DaddyEvil (174208)
• United States
16 Jan 23
They may be afraid she'd swallow them or they'd block her breathing.
2 people like this
@BarBaraPrz (51811)
• St. Catharines, Ontario
16 Jan 23
@DaddyEvil Ever try to swallow a set of dentures?
2 people like this
@DaddyEvil (174208)
• United States
16 Jan 23
@BarBaraPrz Thankfully, I've never had dentures in my mouth.
2 people like this
@Tampa_girl7 (54714)
• United States
17 Jan 23
@GardenGerty it’s unbearably painful watching a loved one die.
1 person likes this
@GardenGerty (169406)
• United States
16 Jan 23
She passed peacefully with comfort care. It was not possible to care for her at home.
1 person likes this
@GardenGerty (169406)
• United States
17 Jan 23
Yes, I have had Hospice in for my first husband. I also have worked in care homes where they assisted.
1 person likes this
@MarieCoyle (59106)
•
16 Jan 23
Oh, this has to be very hard. I do know Hospice can be of help, but that's no consolation to have when a loved one is so ill. I'm so sorry, I hope she gets to go home to give her more peace of mind.
2 people like this
@GardenGerty (169406)
• United States
17 Jan 23
Hospice helped me when my first husband was ill.
1 person likes this
@much2say (57760)
• Los Angeles, California
18 Jan 23
This is somewhat similar to what my dad went through in October . . . it hit my mom and I hard too. Feeling for you @GardenGerty 
.
.@GardenGerty (169406)
• United States
17 Jan 23
Thank you for the caring thoughts.
1 person likes this
@GardenGerty (169406)
• United States
17 Jan 23
I am just going to keep on breathing and wait for her daughters to tell me what they need from me.
1 person likes this
@RasmaSandra (97912)
• Daytona Beach, Florida
16 Jan 23
I will keep praying for her and hope that the best can be done for her. My husband went through a very tough time with his mom. My mother-in-law had cancer on the pleura. It was a tough time and the night before she passed she asked to be brought home. Thank God the hospital does not keep patient's out door clothes. We told her we would see about that tomorrow, The next day came and we sat with her, She had screamed all night from pain and given morphine. Finally I had some errands to run but before I left I heard her say I am dying what should I do. Before I left I said the Lord's Prayer for her and the next day she was gone.
1 person likes this
@GardenGerty (169406)
• United States
16 Jan 23
I know my sister loved the Lord. She is better now.
1 person likes this
@GardenGerty (169406)
• United States
17 Jan 23
It is hard. Growing ol is not for sissys.
1 person likes this
@LindaOHio (222222)
• United States
17 Jan 23
I am so sorry Heather. I cannot imagine what you are going through. I read that she had passed. May she rest in peace.
