Amy Vanderbilt, Emily Post, and Miss Manners

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Etiquette. I was born in the 1950s and raised on the etiquette of the time. Everything was covered. My family was not rich, but my mom wanted me to have good manners. I learned how to set a table, walk like a lady, clap my hands like a lady, how to use my tableware properly and more. I was taught how to sit like a lady because back when I was a kid, we wore dresses whenever we went out to eat or to anything else. We did not wear jeans or slacks out to public occasions. We had to make sure our legs were together so as not to show our undies, etc. and how to properly cross our legs like ladies. If you have been following me, you probably know that I enjoy cooking competition shows. So, something that really bothers me about these shows is how the judges eat, how they use their tableware, etc. Very few, if any, are following any of the etiquette that I learned. It isn't quite as bad to me as someone smacking their lips or talking with the mouths full, but it still puts me off a bit. Etiquette rules, at least back in the day, included how to cut your meat, which hands to use for each step, and how to put the food into your mouth. None of these professionals who are chefs and judges in all of these top restaurants, 3 and 4 star places, in all of their dressed up clothing...the way I was taught, my mother would have said they eat like pigs. Maybe etiquette has changed tremendously over the years, but that much? We would never, ever, eat off of our butter knife. We would never cut our food with the knife in our right hand and keep it in our right hand while we pick up and eat with our fork in the left hand and the fork upside down. We would never stick the fork in our mouths and show our teeth closing over the fork without closing our lips over the fork. We did not show our teeth when taking the food into our mouths. Instead, we cut our food with the right hand, set the knife down across the top edge of the plate, and used the fork in our right hand to pick up the food. We opened our mouths and put the fork inside, with the fork right side up, and close our lips over the forks, sliding the forks out cleanly, never showing our teeth. I know it should not bother me. But it does. Do you think etiquette is important these days? Is making a good impression important or is it simply okay to just do what everyone else does even if it doesn't look good? Now I see women with short, tight skirts and they sit so that you can see right up to their undies. Modesty? Not much. Also, back then we wore slips under our dresses so that people could not see our legs through the skirts. It seems that is not the way things are done these days. BTW, I don't know much about the etiquette for boys and men other than getting up and giving your seat to a lady or an elderly person. I don't see that much these days either. So, is following proper etiquette important or not so much? Is not following proper etiquette being disrespectful of those around you and of yourself? What is your opinion?