How to be polite
April 18, 2007 12:11pm CST
Polite Ways to Say Your Zipper Is Down - by David Letterman 10. The cucumber has left the salad. 9. Quasimodo needs to go back in the tower and tend to his bells. 8. You need to bring your tray table to the upright and locked position. 7. Paging Mr. Johnson ... Paging Mr. Johnson. 6. Elvis is leaving the building. 5. The Buick is not all the way in the garage. 4. Our next guest is someone who needs no introduction. 3. You've got a security breach at Los Pantaloons. 2. Men may be From Mars.....but I can see something that rhymes with Venus. And the #1 way to tell someone his zipper is unzipped..... 1. You've got your fly set for "Monica" instead of "Hillary".
18 Apr 07
A woman in Cape Coral, Florida, arrested for shoplifting has attributed her crime to irritable bowel syndrome. The woman, identified as 61-year-old Helen Gallo, of Clearwater, Florida, was arrested on April 15 after police say that she shoplifted from a grocery store in Cape Coral, The Daily Breeze of Cape Coral reported. Gallo reportedly told the cops that she could not wait in line because she has irritable bowel syndrome, the newspaper said. Gallo was charged with petit larceny and released April 15 from the Lee County jail on $500 bail.