My friend is always late..... grrr..grrr.grrr

@cheenlly (3483)
Philippines
April 19, 2007 10:49am CST
I had this friend of mine who always makes me wait for an hour or two. It seems like she doesnt give importance or respect that someone has doing an effort and a lot of self control not to be angry but the she make me reach my boiling point when the time she makes me wait for almost 4 hours.... grrr..grrr. i was really mad and i really brag on him. we had argue because she didnt realize what she did. She is so insensitive, instead she was the one has the nerve to get mad on me like it was my fault. Oh my.... grrr grrrr... Now we had the gap. What should i do to make her realized that she had the bad attitude and habit and what should i do to change her? PLs help.thanks
9 people like this
38 responses
@piropos (312)
• Philippines
20 Apr 07
This is very common among Filipinos. We even have this expression to denote such practice: Filipino Time. This means that being one or two hours late is not considered late at all, but simply a matter of inconvenience that one should let pass. This insensitivity to time and how much is lost due to being late is quite ingrained in the Filipino psyche. Time and again, we have been reminded that time is gold, yet this practice is rampant and is even expected in some social events. It is like, if you are some big shot guy, you are not expected to be on time and in fact people expect you to make a grand entrance, create a stir when you make your appearance. But on a personal note, I really hate being late. I prefer that I am the one to wait, that the one being waited for. In college, I was usually the one who opens the gate of the building where we had our room. And surprisingly, among my classmates, those who lived in nearby dormitories were usually late in coming to school, while those who lived in the provinces would usually be the earliest ones in school. Quite ironic, is it?
• India
20 Apr 07
Hey budddy c its not only rainbows and butterflies its compramise tht move ppl along Soooo she might be having some or the reason to be late thtzz y she come late or u can do one thing either compramise with her or wenevr u meet next time u too come late thn she'll realise wen she'll wait for u
2 people like this
@denden (803)
• Philippines
20 Apr 07
I am very impatient when someone makes me wait for about and 30 minutes especially an hour.I will get mad and i will confront here why she is like that.
@megaplaza (1441)
• Nigeria
20 Apr 07
i hate poor time keeping from my friends, i always love to be at the venue of any date at leats 5 mins b4 time and it pisses me off when i have to wait for like another 30 mins or more, b4 the person shows up.
@maryannemax (12170)
• Sweden
20 Apr 07
there are lots of people around who are so insensitive. and good that you, as her friend is really sensitive - for her behalf. i have a friend before who always comes in an hour or 30 minutes late. for me, time is precious and so, i really get annoyed quickly whenever i am waiting for her to arrive. i talked to her and told her how much i hate her attitude of being late all the time. good thing was, she listened. the next time we met, she's no longer late... and even arrives early already. as for you, talk to her... be sincere and be true. i am sure she'll realize her mistakes. and maybe, renew her ways for the better. anyway,have you thought about your reunion? happy myLotting!
2 people like this
@howard96h (11643)
• New York, New York
19 Apr 07
I have a friend like that and I will not wait. If you have an appointment for 10 AM and they are not there at 10 then just leave. Your friend will get the message when she arrives and does not see you there. Believe me after a couple of times she will stop this. This is the only way to teach her.
2 people like this
• India
20 Apr 07
I think by reading ur discussion that my freind must be thinking this way always..She always waits for me and I have this habit of going late,..but i dont go intentionally , its just that i get late..I think I have to get ready quickly form now on
1 person likes this
@maryannemax (12170)
• Sweden
20 Apr 07
your friend might be too patient of you. but i guess one day, she'll open up to you as well. don't abuse her kindness. atleast don't be late all the time. it annoys and sometimes is a threat to friendship.
@carryli (876)
• China
20 Apr 07
I really dislike the one who always be late when we have a appointment.I am a unpatient girl,so i won't wait a person for a long time!
1 person likes this
@Stiletto (4584)
20 Apr 07
Well I must admit I'm quite like your friend because I always seem to be running late. Maybe not quite as bad - 4 hours is a long time!! Maybe now you've had an argument about it that will make her think and try harder in the future. You can't really do anything to change her although I suppose you could try giving her a taste of her own medicine and keep her waiting for 4 hours - see how she likes that!
1 person likes this
@inalot (98)
• Malaysia
20 Apr 07
sometimes somebody just won't change.. its a habit.. can't blame totally to the person as maybe he/she's like that because of the way he had brought up or the family background etc etc. However its not impossible to change this type of person but it may take some time
1 person likes this
• Philippines
20 Apr 07
I have been in that situation especially in college. I have a friend who is the number one late comer. Whenever we have to go out and she came late like one or two hours.. I get really really mad and by the time she come I tell it to her face that I'm really angry with her now and she don't know how to read a clock. Sometimes I yell at her, she can't do anything about it cause it her fault. After telling her all my hate I will ask her not to talk to me and let me cool down first. I know I come late sometimes but the only deiffernce is just minutes like 10 or 2o thats it but never up to an hour. I think if you really know her and you two are real friends you can tell it to her as honestly as possible that you don't feel good about this being so late and if all else fails I think its just time to let her do her way.
1 person likes this
@lucy02 (5017)
• United States
20 Apr 07
You can't change her. I've known a few people like this and I've decided that something in their brain makes them this way. You don't have to let her make your life misereble though. Don't ever sit around waiting for her. Hang out with your other friends and if she wants to hang out she can meet y'all whenever she wants but make it clear that you will not wait for her. 4 hour is ridiculous.
@shorva (923)
• Philippines
20 Apr 07
Being late is a sign of arrogance. If she does it so often that means she doesn't give you importance. How can you even stand your friend, she's been rude? Don't you think so? Oh well, I guess you care a lot about her. But men, 4 hours is waaaay too long. How could she not realize that she's wrong? I don't wanna judge your friend, but the best way is to tell her straight that you don't want her to be late next time. Why do you even wait an hour? I would have left by then. Your too nice. Forget about her:)...i'm just kidding. (but jokes are half meant).
1 person likes this
@owlwings (41798)
• Cambridge, England
20 Apr 07
Forget about her. You can say what you like but unless she is prepared to learn about her own selfishness, there is nothing you can do. If she has very few other saving graces, then she is not worthy of your friendship. There are plenty other nicer people in this world who will apologise if they are late. This one will have to learn humility, amongst other things, the hard way.
1 person likes this
@tonyjms (75)
20 Apr 07
I got a friend just like that never on time not even for work! just a week ago we all went away in cars to west wales as the weather was amazing, we all agreed to leave at 9.00am so I was up bright and early and then leaned at 9.00am my friend was still in bed! On one occasion we all booked a tour around an old mansion called tredegar house, and surprise, surprise my mate was late for the tour and got refused entry, when they rebooked them on a later tour, they were still late for that one! And they wonder why they can't get a hogher paid job lol!!
1 person likes this
• India
20 Apr 07
i also have many friends who does not come on time inspite of instructing him so strictly. it rreallly hurts and its not liable to keep anyone waiting despite of knowing the time. i personally think as if they dont have value for time. there are some of my friends who always makes me wait for sometime. it seems like he doesnt give importance or respect that someone has doing and effort. where products havae built in memory media. consumers are strongly recommended to back up and reamove such data from the products before submitting them for repair. to the extent permitted by applicable laws it shall not under any circumstances be liable either expressly or impliedly for any damages orlosses of any kind watsoever resulting form loss of damage of or corruption of and use of content or data during repair or replacement of the product. thus i strongly say that each and every one should understand the value of time ofthem and of others as well. if they dont have respect for their time than also they should atleast have value for others time.
@stella1989 (2274)
• India
20 Apr 07
Well try telling her about this very firmly But for almost three times.Not more than that!!You have your self respect don't you?know your worth very well. If she still shows no change then star waiting for her not more than half hour!! Do not exceed from that!! If she still shows no change then start leaving her the place she is. Creat a story that you were to much in hurry which made you to leave her, do this for 5 times and if she still shows no change then stop waiting for her and this time tell her the truth that you hate this behaviour of her!! and thats it! she will have to change.
@mskzalameda (4036)
• Philippines
20 Apr 07
We have the same situation. I also have a friend like that. I remember that we need to take a college entrance exam in the no. 1 school in the Philippines and then she made me wait for her in about an hour. It made me so irritated to her but I can do nothing for it is already done. I just gave her a pretty long sermon. I told her that change her bad attitude for it would only worsen her life in the future. Me, I am time conscious. I am very shy when I come in late and so I make it to a point not to be late for it is a very shameful act. You better try to talk to her about this matter. Say to her that it is so irritating or try to be late next time. Try to set an appointment with her and let her wait for hours.. maybe in that way (even bad) she will learn her lessons well.
@naka75 (796)
• Singapore
20 Apr 07
I think the best way is to "trick" her into a situation where her friends are late for her. She has to feel the way her friends are feeling, if she is serious about friendship.
1 person likes this
• India
20 Apr 07
as i have no gf but i have a frend name as rahul as he is my past time frend as he is my school frend frend and we studied in the same class as he had the same problem that he always wait someone. i dont forgot that day on which he wait me for 5 to 6 hour as we have planned for attening a party and the party was at the night but we decided to go 4 to 5 hour befor but i cant as he came at the time of party as we never reach there in time ,so we refused it as after that time he always do that i am so angary with him that he do such type of work as this shows that how rude the other one it shows that you dont give other respect................. as i always told him not to do that but he cant after some time when i teach him that this will give a bad impression on the other .......
1 person likes this