When you're gone....
By lisado
@lisado (1227)
United States
April 21, 2007 12:23pm CST
Do you have a will? Have you made arrangements for what will happen to your belongings, kids, pets and so on if something were to happen to you? Do you have someone to handle things for you when you're gone?
My husband and I have been meaning to get paperwork done but we keep putting it off. I guess it's something a lot of people don't want to think about. Anything could happen at any time so we really should get it done. Anyone else procrastinating about this stuff or have you actually gotten paperwork together?
2 people like this
6 responses
@carlaabt (3504)
• United States
21 Apr 07
My husband and I do have all of our stuff in order. If we die one at a time, everything goes to the other person. If we die together, his sister and one of my sisters handle the money, but it all goes to our son. One of my other sisters gets the baby and the pets, and she will of course get some money to take care of them, but it will all have to be approved through someone else, just to keep her from spending ALL of his money or something. We actually need to go change our will soon, though. The sister that is supposed to be taking care of my son is getting married to someone that would probably spend any money he could get his hands on, and we definitely don't want that!
We got everything in order last summer when my husband was getting ready to be deployed. Since we already had to go to the legal office, we decided to get it all taken care of at once.
1 person likes this
@lisado (1227)
• United States
23 Apr 07
We've meant to get it done several times. Usually it has came up when Matt was being sent out on deployment but something always came up that we didn't get it done. Since he's been on shore duty it's taken a back burner, even though the chance of something happening here is greater than something happening to him while he's out on the carrier. Car accidents and such.
Our problem is trusting someone to handle that stuff. With an infant and a special needs child that will need help all of his life, finding anyone in the family (besides our parents who may not be around long enough to handle them the rest of their lives) or otherwise that we trust with their care. Sad, isn't it? :( We have the same situation you are talking about with the sister you mention. We have several members like that on both sides.
@lisado (1227)
• United States
28 Jun 07
How many kids do you have? Any chance of them getting into a fight over stuff when you are gone? I'm more worried about making sure my kids go to family and not get lost in the system if something happens to us. Zacky will never be able to care for himself (he is non-verbal and Autistic) and I want to make sure he is taken care of. We're hoping that Jesse won't have that type of issue, but we don't know yet since he is only 14 months old.
@lisado (1227)
• United States
23 Apr 07
That's been our issue. Some people say "you're only 34" but people die every day in car accidents and such. We've talked about it but actually getting around to get something on paper and noterized (sp?) hasn't gotten done yet. We really need to do this! I don't want my children stuck in the "system" because we didn't get around to making our wishes known on paper.
@musicman6 (2413)
• United States
17 Jun 07
I was reading up on wills and trusts,and it said that actually, a trust is better than a will! When you have a will,when you die, the will goes to the courts, and it goes into "probate", then takes some time and money to wait and get it processed before the property belongs to you! In a trust the property goes to the name of the beneficiary, while you are still alive,then when you die, they receive possession of it, and it doesn't have to go to probate court,thus eliminating a lot of time and money!
@lisado (1227)
• United States
28 Jun 07
Thanks for the tip! I'll have to check out the library and see what I can find out. Since we can go to Navy Legal I don't think we have to pay for either. I know they will do wills for no charge to active duty, but not sure about trusts. We don't have a lot, anyway, but anything we can keep out of legal fees and leave to our sons would be great!
@musicman6 (2413)
• United States
18 Jun 07
Yes, that's the difference between a will and a trust, you set up a trust through an attorney! The reason you don't hear much about trusts, is that attorney's and the courts make money off of the procedure of a will, and they don't make as much money off of you with a trust! There are books that explain all this at the library, which are very helpful!
@saierchok (1294)
• United States
17 Jun 07
I'm only 20 YO, and my whole so called fortune does not exceed 20 000 USD, and never thought of dying or writing a will, but my uncle did a week ago, he is 70 YO and he has an estimated 10m $ fortune.. he isn't married and has no kids..
@lisado (1227)
• United States
28 Jun 07
Did he have a will? If not, what do they do with all of his stuff? Since he has no spouse or kids I don't know how they handle situations like that.
We don't really have anything of value, but anything we do have we want to go to our sons. We also want to set up guardianship in case something happens to us. Also, since one of our sons is special needs and will need to be cared for all of his life, we want to make sure that he is taken care of in case something happens to us.
