How to know if someone is lying to you...

United States
April 23, 2007 9:19am CST
Step One Look for body language that might indicate someone is lying, such as not looking you in the eye when speaking to you, being fidgety, or acting nervous or uncomfortable. Step Two Listen for inconsistencies in what the person tells you, such as different stories on different days, different time frames, mistakes in remembering details or mixing up details. Step Three Notice if the person steadfastly resists answering any questions. Extreme defensiveness could mean that he or she is trying to hide something. Step Four Notice if the person accuses you of lying or being deceitful when you really haven't been. This could reflect the other person's own underlying behavior, which he or she is projecting onto you rather than owning up to it. Step Five Listen to your gut and intuition. You may just know someone is lying. If you are not sure, don't jump to conclusions. Try to get some evidence to back up your hunch. Step Six Consider asking directly if the person has lied to you. Many people feel bad getting caught up in lies, and find it a relief to finally be honest. Step Seven Try to be understanding and listen to the person's reasons for lying. Was he trying not to hurt you? Was she afraid you would be angry, upset or disappointed? Step Eight Look at your possible role in having someone lie to you. Are you someone who gets so upset hearing the truth that others feel they can't be honest with you? What about you? How do you catch someone in a lie? I usually tell by their inconsistancies with their story. How about you?
2 responses
• Philippines
23 Apr 07
I don't like dishonest person. But I will eventually forgive him or her if he/she admits he/she was lying. I can tell that someone is lying when like you said they do step 1-7. (^^,LOL) So the signs are really reliable and of course don't forget to trust your instincts. Have a nice day Jen! (^^,)
@nilzerous1 (2434)
• India
23 Apr 07
Excellent Tips! I did not expect to have so much input in this subject - but there are really going to help out someone. Anyway, I personally trust people brutally, I've paid the penalty a number of times for doing so, still I just can't help that. But now, with my new vision, I'll try to figure out who all are actually lying to me and to treat them accordingly. Thanks.