How STRONG should a wife be?
April 25, 2007 7:27pm CST
The discussion subject is basically the question I have in mind at this moment. My husband is feeling burned out and unaapreciated with work. I can't blame him coz he's been so loyal and dedicated to his profession that quality family time has been sacrificed once too many. He is at his lowest right now and I am losing hope and options at how to motivate him. You see, when he tells me stories about his day, I try to rationalize why the other person acted as such. I try to balance my comments and show him also that there might be things that he is doing that triggers such reaction from his colleagues. Is this wrong? Then whenever I try to say encouraging words to boost his morale, we end up fighting coz he feels that I am not supporting him enough. I am a stay-at-home mom. I don't have any outlet to vent my frustrations and what-nots. When he comes home, I have dinner ready for him and as much as possible have everything he needs to be in order. However, we also have a 7 month old daughter whom I attend with. When he fumes, I hardly know how to react coz anything and everything that I say will eventually be wrong and appear that I am just adding up to his problems. This issue has been a prayer item for me for quite sometime now. Oftentimes when my husband acts really strange, I got nothing to cling on but prayer. So to all my friends, moms and wives out there... I need advices.. How can I be strong? HELP!
4 May 07
I think i'm a bit in the shoes of your husband. My wife is also a stay-at-home mom. Mmost of the time when I came from my work, I can't prevent my self from telling about all my frustrations at my present work. All my grievances that makes me stress and affected the way I approach her. Sometimes I felt some guilt in my heart about my family shortcomings hence I always trying myself to reach out her. What ever happens be strong, stay with your man, He really needs you. He really needs your words.
4 May 07
Thanks so much for your post. I just hope you guys can lessen your insensitivity. There's nothing wrong with discussing work stuff with us, but do remember that we, as wives, are your partner and not your enemy. We are staying at home and not at the work place to assume all the hassles but we are more than willing to hear from you. Just don't take it out on us all the time. No married man can be successful without your wife beside you. Loving your wife and keeping a strong relationship is the best thing you can teach and impart to your kids. They sense the love around you and the family. They will lear to respect you aas parents and other people because they see that mommy and daddy respects each other. Just think about it. Take care and have a good marriage... ;)
26 Apr 07
Thanks for the response lyndee22. Most of the people around me say that my husband ended up like this coz I have been spoiling him so much. Attending to him so much to the point that I don't mind myself anymore. Now at the realm of our struggles, he still thinks that I don't put his best interest before mine.
26 Apr 07
Im sorry.. I can't give a helpful post since i'm not married. But i think you doing a great job as his wife, for being supportive of him and understanding him. He is probably telling all this things to you because he sees you as an ally and he knows you will listen, so be his ally and listen. It is ok that you balance things and rationalized with him, but at the end of it all, make him feel you're on his side no matter what.