Shut up or I'll do it for you.......
@mommey20032005 (264)
United States
April 27, 2007 12:21pm CST
I don't this women at all, and yet she thinks she knows me. I was playing at the park with my children and she was there to with her child. They all started to play, and look like they were having fun. Her child wanted to go down the slide, but my oldest wanted to down too. So i told her to let the other child go first and she did. But when the womens child wanted to go down again, my daughter was just about to slide down. Her child pulled my daughter back and pushed her, and just started to cry. I ran up there to see if she was Ok, and the women said that she will be fine. It's just children playing, and that I should not be so protective of my children. I told her that her son pushed my daughter and hurt her.
And that she needs to keep an eye on her son, he should not be bulling children like that. She went on to say that my daughter needs to be more tough, and stop being such a big baby. She said that I was teaching her to be a wipe and need to take lessons on parenting. I lost it there, I started yelling at her.I told her that her son will end up a juvenile delinquent, and needs to teach him right from wrong. By then my fiance came and I told him what happen. He got mad to, because the women said to him. That your the father teach her how to be tough girl, he said some things. Which i can't say, but they were awful. This happened yesterday, and I'm still upset about it. I think I'm teaching my children right from wrong, and doing a good job. But this women really made me so mad,how dare she tell me how to raise my children.
6 people like this
17 responses
@jmcafam (2890)
• United States
27 Apr 07
So sorry to hear that happened to you and your child. It sounds more like the woman needs to be a better person by teaching her child to wait turns and have good manners. I would be upset too if that had happened to me. I just have to say it sounds like you are doing a good job at teaching your child to allow others to go first and take turns, and that you did stand up for your child.
1 person likes this
@rodeotexas (1153)
• United States
28 Apr 07
I completely agree. You didn't do anything wrong and your daughter was the nice one and let him go first. He needs to be taught some lessons and so does his mom.
1 person likes this
@clary21 (54)
• United States
28 Apr 07
I understand because I have been there. How come your fiance said some things you can't repeat? I hope he was not cursing in front of the children. It is human nature for mothers to be protective of their young, and us mothers do not like to be told we need lessons on parenting. It is too bad you lost your temper in front of the children as this is NOT a good example to be setting for them. The next time this happens it would be best if you totally ignore the woman and do not respond to what she says. Talk only to your daughter and tell her it is time to leave if the little boy can not play nicely. The little boy will probably be upset because he is not getting the attention he seeks and your daughter will probably feel like you are protecting her which is in her best interest. This is the "adult" thing to do since you two mothers were both acting like children. I am sorry if this is not what you want to hear.
1 person likes this
@Stephanie5 (2946)
• United States
28 Apr 07
How could you stand there and say those things in front of your child TO another child!?! You both made complete fools of yourself. Look what you have taught your kids. In my opinion, you show by example and the behavior by your children, was learned from watching the two of you! You both instantly attacked the CHILDREN! And you did this in a park in front of a lot of other people's children. I would of been very upset if my children were there to see that. I think you both could of used better judgement. The boy pushed your girl, that doesn't mean that he's going to grow up robbing banks. How could you say he's going to end up being a juvenile delinquent? I'm sure your daughter has pushed before, does that make her a juvenile delinquent?
Now, having said that, I have behaved the same way you did. I'm so over protective and I don't take critism well. That woman was SOOO out of line, but you should of been the bigger person and just walked away. I'm NOT saying that I use my better judgement all the time. I show my butt too often in fact. I need to have more self control and I think you do too. I'm not trying to be mean and nasty to you at all. You layed it all out here for our opinions and I gave you mine. I hope you can atleast try to understand what I'm saying. Good Luck!
@mommey20032005 (264)
• United States
28 Apr 07
No your right, I should of showed an example.
1 person likes this
@jennybeans (912)
• United States
28 Apr 07
You have every right to be appalled by this woman's behavior. Not only is she teaching her children that it's okay to just walk right up and take whatever you want from someone else, she's teaching them that not responding that way is weakness. What kind of horrible woman condones bullying, especially among children so young. :( I think that in teaching your childlren right from wrong, how to share and how to treat others with respect and kindness is where you are right and that crazy woman was wrong. Keep up the great job being a mother.
@Impervious (1147)
• United States
27 Apr 07
Once again another stellar example of why there should be a licence to have children. Some people will just maintain that " my child can do no wrong attitude right up till the day that they are sentenced to prison. I know that any of the parents that I know would have given that boy a good what for.
Try to let it go, I know how hard that can be but remember that there is no shortage of stupid in the world. Besides do you really think that she is still thinking about it.
1 person likes this
@student7 (1002)
• United States
28 Apr 07
Ok first that woman is raising her son to be abusive and a bully. If she lets this behavior continue then she will probably have a son that beats women. First sign what that little snot did to your precious little girl.
Second, that woman lets her son walk all over her. She can't discipline him because he probably hits her, scratches her, and bites her.
Third is the environment he is in. If his father is abusive to his mother then what is the child going to learn? It is ok to be a bully and beat people up. You had EVERY Right to protect your daughter and tell that mother what you said to her. Yes if that pattern continues he will end up in prison. She has no right to tell you how to raise your child. It seems to me that the mother in her own right was or still is a bully, when the father is not around. This is her way of gaining control of her situation even if she feels out of control.
I know this may sound out of place, next time you are at the park and the mother/son bully tag team are around go else where. Don't leave, then they will think that they own the place and all hell will break lose. Maybe if you talk to the other mothers that go there and see if they had a similar incident with the duo. It is just a suggestion. If I were in your place, I would have done the exact same thing. You have to let your children know that you are there for them. Good luck with the duo.
@Stephanie5 (2946)
• United States
28 Apr 07
OMG! How can you say that? The little boy pushed a girl, BIG DEAL! It happens ALL the time. It does NOT mean that he hits his mother or any of those things that you said! Kids push eachother sometimes...You act like he tried to set fire to the girl or something....how rediculous!
@babykay (2131)
• Ireland
27 Apr 07
It sounds like this woman was in the wrong, for sure. And if it were me, I would probably have done the same thing. However a better course of action to have taken would be to have kept your cool. Perhaps to have responded with a remark to her silly suggestion that you need parenting lessons when clearly her son was out of line, and left it at that but not to have yelled at her, even though this would be hard.
People who bring their kids up to be aggressive and violent are the ones who need the parenting lessons. I think we can probably all benefit from some lessons in how to parent, this woman more than most.
If I were you, in future I would not raise my voice at such a person as this is only bringing you down to their level of conduct which is not very high. But sometimes we can't help ourselves, I know!
@Katlady2 (9904)
• United States
28 Apr 07
I don't blame you for getting upset. I would have too, and probably would have reacted the same way you did. It sounds like that woman needs to take some parenting classes, and also learn to discipline her child. By her allowing her son to hurt your daughter, she is teaching him that it is ok to hurt people and be pushy to get what he wants. And good for your husband to tell her off. Maybe the things he said touched at least one nerve in her insensitive body. I hope your daughter is ok, hon.
@carolscash (9492)
• United States
27 Apr 07
It sounds like this women thinks that her child does no wrong and I think that I would have told her to keep her kid away from mine and that I would have just told her to shut up and leave me alone too. It is okay for you to raise your kids the way that you want to. She needs to parent her kids and not parent yours. It sounds like you are doing a fine job and don't let her make you doubt that.
@bunbunrocks (185)
• United States
27 Apr 07
Now, please don't take offense, but I'm having an opposite feeling here.
Kids push each other at playgrounds all the time, and in my personal opinion, both of the adults here acted terribly wrong. Do you really think and even if you think it it's ok to call someone else's presumably young child a juvenile delinquent? Do you think it was right to banter back in forth in front of your child? Is this really how you want your children to react?
Her wrong doesn't make your right, and there's always better ways to handle thing, especially in front of children.
@dangerpapu (42)
• Pakistan
28 Apr 07
No I think you must not to take the worries of this kind of thinks with your childern This all are childern plays and this make the childerns brave and active It will take ime for you to accept this type of things
@SEOGUY (906)
• United States
28 Apr 07
I wish I new who this woman was, By letting her son do as he leases I beleive this is the worst form of (non Phisical) child abuse. This child will grow up beleiving anything he does is okay, She will probably go to school and yell at teachers for saying her child has a behavior problem, Project sexteen years to the future, he will make some lucky man a fine wife in prison, thanks to this absurd woman. My 9 year old had his lip busted the other day by an 11 year old, The other boys mom thought it was okay becouse my son told the boys sister that girls are stupid. Some parents canjustify anything their child does and how dare anyone tell them that their child is behaveing badly. Just let it go, unless you see her again, take down her plate and report her to child welfare for inableing delinquint behavior.
@amydawn11 (906)
• Canada
27 Apr 07
I think I would have done the same thing you did if that was me at the park with my daughter. Some people just think there kids do no wrong and will stand up for them no matter what. If I think or saw my daughter doing something wrong i confront her i don't blame it on other childern. I love my daughter but she is not perfect, none of us are. I wouldn't worry about it, just take a deep breath and put it behind you, You're proabably not the only person she has gotten into an argument about her child before. She'll learn someday.
@barrywh (11)
• China
28 Apr 07
so sorry to hear of that for you and your daughter,i think the women should say sorry to you,but she didn't.she is arbitrariness as her son,that a teaching problem for her.
@paulsy (1263)
• Philippines
27 Apr 07
I think you were absolutely on the right side. If I were you, I would have been just as upset as you feel right now. The fact that her child was a boy and your child was a girl, she should have simply apologized for what her son had done. Yes, the children were just playing, but that doesn't mean that her son was doing the right thing by hurting his playmates! There are ways to teach your daughter to be tough. But letting a boy hurt her is definitely not the way. Allowing her son to hurt playmates is also not the say to teach him to be tough. She probably is the kind of mother who enjoys watching her son bully other kids too. As for you, you were doing the right thing to defend your own child. I would have done the same if this happened to me.
@beaniegdi (1964)
•
27 Apr 07
That is a horrible thing to happen and it can be a dreadful eye opener to find out how others raise their children. It is better though not to get into arguments with people like this as it is upsetting for the children and you don't really know what someone like this might do. Children do tend to push and shove a bit when it comes to playing and maybe you upset this woman when you called her son a bully. For all you know she went home upset as well as you. Try not to be upset about this, just concentrate on how you bring up your own child and try to put this out of your mind. The children involve sound very young and have no doubt forgotten all this.
@babyangie27 (5176)
• United States
27 Apr 07
It is sad to hear a story like this,some parents don't want to face the fact that their child is being mean or bulling. But I don't think yelling is a way to deal with it sometimes has parents we have to walk away our children are watching,I understand being so mad at this person. Don't take this the wrong way,I too have done the same thing you have. Just have faith in how you are raising your child and forget about people like this woman you feel the need to tell you how to raise your child. I know it might take a few days to cool off but stay strong and keep doing what you are doing. I hope I didn't come off rude I just wanted to share my feelings. Good luck hun.
