Adoptions

@kelandy (114)
United States
April 30, 2007 7:34am CST
I would like to know if anyone from the myLot group is a birthmother who gave up a child for adoption. I did 5 years ago. It was a little boy. I have an open adoption. The adoptive parents are wonderful and keep in touch with us regularly i.e. sending photos, and making phone calls. It was a tough experience and I would like to have some feedback from some of you on this subject. Thank you.
1 person likes this
3 responses
@wachit14 (3595)
• United States
30 Apr 07
I have two adopted children and I often wonder how their own birth mothers fared over the years. We did not adopt from a state that allows open adoptions so they have little information about their birth mothers. My son is about to turn eighteen and he wants to do a search and, of course, we support him. Birth mothers are wonderful people who give a very unselfish gift to those who cannot be parents any other way. I know it must be tough, but to your son's adoptive family, you are an angel.
@Gemmygirl1 (2867)
• Australia
1 May 07
I have never given up or adopted a child but i have always wanted to know what the birth mother does or is allowed to do when it comes to a situation like this. You are one of the wonderful people who doesn't abort, you carried the child to term & were very selfless in giving him to a couple who, for whatever reason, couldn't have children of their own. It would be great to see more people like you :) I think an open adoption is a wonderful idea, you still have some contact &/or updates of what your son is up to but still give him the chance to have a loving family & extra parents, that means more presents :) - LOL! If you don't mind my asking - what made you put him up for adoption after carrying him for 9 months, rather than aborting early? You don't have to go in to personal info or anything i was just wondering what made you choose 1 over the other :)
@kelandy (114)
• United States
1 May 07
I would like to thank you for your lovely comment. I am not however the most wonderful person and I'll explain why. I almost did abort, but something kept getting in the way of it. It must have been a special sign that I needed to give life to my child and in the end I wound up giving him to lovely parents who already had a young girl. The couple was chosen by my husband and me through a profile that an adoption agency set us up with. Yes we are able to correspond with them. They were able to give him what we couldn't at the time. I did subsequently have another little boy less than a year and a half later. The adoptive parents know about our 3 year old son. The son that I gave to them is going to be 5 in a few days. The reason I said that I was not so wonderful is because as I mentioned I almost cut his life short in the early weeks in the fetus. I do not want this to become an issue on myLot to condemn or persecute anyone for the choices that they make. I basically feel that what I did at the time was the proper thing to do. Feel free to comment back. Thank you.
@tinamwhite (3252)
• United States
30 Apr 07
Kelandy, I have never experienced this....I am not sure that I could ever give up one of my children....I do think that you are very fortunate athat the adoptive parents have continued to allow you to see him, as he grows.....many never see their child again.