Whom would you choose and why?

@winterose (39887)
Canada
May 2, 2007 11:48am CST
One of the hardest obstacles in today's society is to balance work and family life. Many families are complaining that they do not have enough time for family activities or family life in general, their work is demanding more and more from them to the point that it is truly interfering. Which is more important to do, getting a head in your job so that you can make all kinds of money to support your family financially and give them everything they want even though you don't see them. Or having less money many even struggling to make ends meet but you and your spouse are they together to raise the family? What spouse would you choose, the one that works so hard the kids hardly no him but you have everything financially you could want, Or the spouse who is a loving father, always at home, and you hardly are able to pay your bills and make ends meet?
6 people like this
12 responses
@whyaskq (7523)
• Singapore
3 May 07
It would be ideal to strike a balance. It is unlikely a family who struggles to make ends meet will have the spouse together to raise the family as both parents will be busy making money too. It would be nice to have a head to bring in money for the family provided the head does not need to work 24 hours. In my opinion, it does better for both parents to be working while the children is under day care of either the grandparents, day care centre or schools.
2 people like this
@worldwise1 (14885)
• United States
3 May 07
Just want to put in my two cents about daycare. I am well aware that it is necessary in some cases, but it would not be my first choice. Maybe it's because I come from a different time, but the whole purpose in having kids is to raise them by your own hand. I see so many young people these days who just don't want to be bothered with their kids. They'll do anything to get rid of them. That's not how it was meant to be.
2 people like this
@whyaskq (7523)
• Singapore
3 May 07
While I agree with you and I do have some reservations about daycare centers, I do not mean throwing the kids there :P In Singapore, there are daycare centers which provide enrichment and personal development classes to the kids and at times, it is better to put them there if the parents or grandparents are not "educationally" inclined. I would say it depends on the family and what is deemed best.
1 person likes this
@worldwise1 (14885)
• United States
3 May 07
At this point in my life all I worry about is whether my adult children have the time to fit me into their lives. I was in a 20-year relationship until about five years ago. When that fell apart, I chose to remain unattached. As to your question, I would rather have a happy medium- a successful and loving relationship where we get to spend lots of quality time together and enough money to go around. Sadly, that is next to impossible these days (unless you are independently wealthy). My great-aunt who raised me had a saying that went something like, I would rather live in a one-room shack and be happy than to live in a mansion without. So, there you go.
@Betso221 (1699)
• India
3 May 07
I think that is a very tough question to answer cause i feel a family mostly understand that why he is doing so much hard work he is doing all for tha family cause he wants them to get whatever they need in your life so that after earning so much the whole family can stay happily and enjoy themselves in the future.
1 person likes this
@mypigbox (2245)
• China
3 May 07
The spouse is better to work altogether.This will bring more money back home.and spouse is important to family.they are equal.that is my opinion.
1 person likes this
@charms88 (7538)
• Philippines
3 May 07
Ahhh, this is a very difficult question. Money nowadays are difficult to earn. If I choose to have a husband who works all the time and hardly have any time for me and the children, I would end up lonely. If I choose the other way around, I don't think we will have a very peaceful life either. I would prefer in-between. I don't require my man to work 24/7 just to feed us and give everything we needed. Whatever he can earn, I will be there to help him out.
@docaru (28)
• Qatar
3 May 07
Its the choices and decisions that sometimes hard to decide, because quality time that should have been spent with the family will never be retrieve and during your twillight years you would evaluate that you should have to choose spending those special moments with the family,on the other hand there was also these strong point that would alter those grievances when you have finally establish a strong financial foundation for your siblings and have prepare a good stable future for them.
1 person likes this
@jewel76 (2305)
• Canada
3 May 07
I don't even have to think this one through; the loving father all the way. Money helps pay bills and buy things, but that's it. It won't help teach your kids right from wrong, it won't help tuck your kids in bed at night, it won't help have a nice family picnic. Family is so much more important than money could ever be, even if we're having a hard time make ends meet, i'd prefer my kids knew both their parents and got to spend precious time with the both of them.
1 person likes this
• India
3 May 07
every situation has its own pros and cons and it depends entirely on how you are able to handle different situations per se. i was never a stay at home mom and was entirely dependent on my in-laws to bring up my kid! (lucky me, i know) but even such an arrangement was fraught with unspoken tensions as each mother has her own way of bringing up a child. many a times i have thought of giving up my job as i was not happy with the way my son was brought up by my mom-in-law. but the money i earned helped the family a lot financialy and even today i pay all expenses for my child (school fees included). my husband is a darling easy type of person who never hankered for a good job or better pay. he was satisfied with what he earned and generally stayed at home giving company to our growing son. even i was happy with the arrangements as i liked the fact that father and son shared a special bond. but now, with rising inflation, i have forced my husband to look for better paying jobs and he, the poor thing, is out of home most of the time. gone are the idyllic afternoons when my son would walk from school into his father's arms or when they would share a story book and go to sleep together after having lunch. i feel very guilty specially as my son has become very lonely with only his aged grandparents for company, till i go home in the evening. but i am at a loss as we desperately need more money to maintain our minimal lifestyle otherwise we will just become more poor in a few years from now. as the saying goes " take what you want but pay for it!"
1 person likes this
@Celanith (2327)
• United States
3 May 07
For me family is first, last and always, Money is important but there are ways to make ends meet. Family is what you rely on and need when things are tough, they are who you laugh with and share with and build lasting memories with. Hey Carol is this you. I hope so. I added you to my friends. Jen
@tholitz (1127)
• Philippines
3 May 07
This is a hard question, what will I choose money or family, a good and abundance life against a hard life. I wish I can choose in between, an adequate life where I can have a complete meals in everyday (3 times) and enough money to buy the necessity of life such as clothes, water, etc. without sacrificing the family bonding and time. People are looking for convenience in life, I can see it here in my country where most family head (father, mother, eldest son/daughter) are going to other countries to work and support their families. But this plan had many disadvantages, broken family, children growing in a bad way, etc. So I think family should be prioritize and go first of all, but we should look for a way on how to give our son and daughter an adequate life.
1 person likes this
@mari123 (1861)
• China
3 May 07
it is difficult to choose,in today's society,money is the best,if you have no money,you can do andthing,and don't support family financially and give your children good education.so in modern times,i will choose the first one,but in a family to consider,spouse need love,and have a happy family,so the last is best,in oreder to balance work and family life ,the spouse also should balance their emothion,.
1 person likes this
@castleghost (1304)
• United States
3 May 07
While it is nice to have everything one wants in life it is even nicer to know that you have the love of your family. I want a good relationship with my children while I would love to be able to afford everything that they want in life I think that it is more beneficail to them to know that they have my love and support. Money doesn't always bring happiness.
1 person likes this