A friendly jew?

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Where did this term come from? Its so offensive? This last Hanukkah I was in a restaurant. I was paying my bill and an older woman walked up, I let her go ahead of me. She said to the host. "Merry Christmas and she is so disgusted by the use of merry X-mas, that is the only holiday whynot just call it Christmas," The host replies, "actually it is not the only holiday, there is Hannukah," I chimed in saying "It actually comes before Christmas this month and gave the date." She gets all hostile and says "Well that's not a real holiday." and storms out. The host and I look at each other in a little disbelief. Then he says, "your Jewish? I am too. Nonpracticing though, I am a friendly Jew." I smiled and left. I was very disturbed by this saying. I am nonpracticing, a friendly Jew. He is basically saying a nonpracticing Jew is friendly, the underlying belief is assimilation which the Jewish people have fought so hard for so long to stop. It is sad and very self loathing. I think it is sad that this term is used. Even worse than someone of any other religion saying this, it is denying his own ethnicity, his own people, it says a lot about public and self acceptance of the Jewish identity.