Top Ten Ways To Terrorize A Telemarketer

@Katlady2 (9920)
United States
May 4, 2007 10:31pm CST
Number 10: When they ask, "How are you today?" -- tell them! Say something like... "I'm so glad you asked because no one there days seems to care, and I have all these problems; my arthritis is acting up, my eyelashes are sore, my dog just died...." You get the idea. Number 9: If they say they're John Doe from XYZ Company, ask them to spell their name. Then ask them to spell the company name. Then ask them where it is located. Continue asking them personal questions or questions about their company for as long as necessary. Number 8: Cry out in surprise, "Judy! Is that you? Oh, my goodness, Judy, how have you been?" Hopefully, this will give Judy a few brief moments of pause as she tries to figure out where the heck she could possibly know you from. Number 7: If MCI calls trying to get you to sign up for the Family and Friends plan, reply in as sinister a voice as you can, "I don't have any friends... would you be my friend?" Number 6: If they want to loan you money, tell them you just filed for bankruptcy and you could sure use some money. Number 5: Tell the telemarketer you are on "home arrest" and ask if they could bring you a case of beer and some chips. Number 4: After the telemarketer gives their spiel, ask him/her to marry you. When they get all flustered, tell them that you could not just give your credit card number to a complete stranger. Number 3: Tell the telemarketer you are busy at the moment and ask them if they will give you their home phone number so you can call them back. When the telemarketer explains that they cannot give out their home number, you say, "I guess you don't want anyone bothering you at home, right?" The telemarketer will agree and you say, "Now you know how I feel!" Number 2: Insist that the caller is really your buddy, Leon, playing a joke. "Come on, Leon, cut it out! Seriously, Leon, how's your momma?" And last but not least... Number 1: Tell them to talk v-e-r-y s-l-o-w-l-y, because you want to write every word of your conversation down.
8 people like this
12 responses
@gabs8513 (48708)
• United Kingdom
5 May 07
Kat I will print this lol and I will certainly take your advise on this as it sounds fun and you know I love being up to mischief lol
2 people like this
@Katlady2 (9920)
• United States
6 May 07
Getting into mischief is so much fun though! LOL
1 person likes this
@gabs8513 (48708)
• United Kingdom
6 May 07
hehehehe I am glad someone agrees with me
1 person likes this
@Katlady2 (9920)
• United States
8 May 07
But of course! Imagine if we were turned loose to go shopping together....NO ONE would be safe! LOLOL
1 person likes this
@hezoid (2147)
5 May 07
These are excellent! I think i might have to print the lsit out and keep it by the phone, ready for when the next pesky Telemarketer calls! I really, really hate unsolicited phone calls, and untill they are banned i will try some of these beauties out! Thanks!
2 people like this
@Katlady2 (9920)
• United States
6 May 07
Those people are pretty aggravating aren't they? I hope these work for you. Hehehe
• Australia
5 May 07
these will come in very handy one day...they r good...have had telemarketers call up home in a very very long time
2 people like this
@Katlady2 (9920)
• United States
5 May 07
LOL I get them every once in a while
• United States
5 May 07
I'm totally going to use those! I'm always trying to come up with something to make telemarketers hang up on me. Next one calls, I'm definitely going to use one of those. That's great!
2 people like this
@Katlady2 (9920)
• United States
5 May 07
Thanks hon. I was snickering the whole time I was reading them. Hubby uses # 3 all the time....it works really well. They hang up pretty darned fast. LOL
1 person likes this
• Canada
13 Jun 07
Thsoe are great gonna try a few of those myself
1 person likes this
@Katlady2 (9920)
• United States
14 Jun 07
LOL And I bet you'll have the same little evil grin as your avatar, right? Hehehehe
1 person likes this
• Canada
15 Jun 07
You better belive it and soem tiem s i even torment them by saying just one more sec then listen to the TV real loud.
@deebomb (15315)
• United States
6 May 07
These top ten ways to Terrorize A Telemarketer sound like fun. I almost wish I was not on the national do not call list. Wouldn't it be easer to get on the NATIONAL DO NOT CALL REGISTRY. The only telemarketers I get now is from charities like the State trooper association.. It really is easy to register . And it is registered for 5 years. https://www.donotcall.gov/default.aspx
@Katlady2 (9920)
• United States
6 May 07
I love that registry. Each of my land lines, plus our cell phones are registered on it. It's been much more peaceful, phonewise.
1 person likes this
@deebomb (15315)
• United States
6 May 07
I do to They can be so annoying when they get insistant. but your way does sound like fun.
1 person likes this
• India
22 May 07
This is a perfect to terrorise them lol..Thanks for letting me know this.I would certainly follow this..And pass on this list to my friends as well. Thanks :)
@Katlady2 (9920)
• United States
22 May 07
LOL! Thanks hon. Hope your friends get some use out of them too.
@munhozmib (3840)
• Sao Paulo, Brazil
15 May 07
Those are really some ways of getting rid of Telemarketers! I wish they kept on calling here, so I'd use one by one all these. But they all stopped calling some while ago, for mysterious reasons (Thank God).
1 person likes this
@Katlady2 (9920)
• United States
15 May 07
Lucky you! There are a few that still make their feeble attempts, but I am such a smartypants that they usually end up hanging up REAL fast. LOL
@sweetlady10 (3617)
• United States
7 May 07
Wow these ten ways sounds like lot of fun. Whenever I get a call from telemarketer next time, I would surely apply one of these. I am going to save this and will share with my friends, they would love them too. So, from the next time me and my hubby can become a headach for telemarketer LOL.
1 person likes this
@Katlady2 (9920)
• United States
8 May 07
Make THEM have to go and buy the headache medicine for a change. LOL Have fun!
• Philippines
7 May 07
lol. geez this is really funny and useful. sometimes its really annoying when someone will call you and ask to subscribe to their products or whatsoever. ill try this the next they call. XD it'll be surely a lot of fun for me and so much annoyance for them.
1 person likes this
@Katlady2 (9920)
• United States
8 May 07
I think your horns and forked tail are showing hon. LOL You'll have to let me know how they enjoyed your terrorizing. Hehehe
@blackbriar (9080)
• United States
7 May 07
lol These are pretty funny, Kat. Before I put all my phone numbers on the National Do Not Call Registery, I was always asking them if I could borrow whatever amount the product was they were selling and would pay them back when I got paid for my hitman services. They would hang up every time. lol Now, my landline never rings and my cell only rings when my family/friends call.
1 person likes this
@Katlady2 (9920)
• United States
8 May 07
Now that would have been a fun one to try. LOL My dad always pretended to be a chauvinist when it was a female caller. He would always say that he didn't buy from women, and the poor girls would cough and sputter and end up hanging up without saying another word. It was hilarious.
@astroo13 (964)
• India
5 May 07
It’s the spring of 1957 and Bobby goes to pick up his date. He's a pretty hip guy with his own car. When he goes to the front door, the girl's father answers and invites him in. "Carrie's not ready yet. Why don't you have a seat?" Carrie's father asks Bobby what they're planning to do. Bobby replies politely that they will probably just go to the soda shop or a movie. "Why don't you two go out and screw? I hear all the kids are doing it!" Naturally, this comes as a quite a surprise to Bobby so he asks Carrie's dad to please repeat himself. "Yeah," says Carrie's father, "Carrie really likes to screw; she'll screw all night if we let her!" A few minutes later, Carrie comes downstairs in her little poodle skirt and matching cardigan sweater and announces that she's ready to go. Breathless with anticipation, Bobby escorts his date out the front door. About 20 minutes later, Carrie rushes back into the house, slams the door behind her, and screams at her father: “Dad, it's called the Twist!"
1 person likes this
@Katlady2 (9920)
• United States
6 May 07
Ohhhhh, that's a naughty one! LOL